@ gracevslaw I haven't heard anything lately. I don't think Timothy is still absent from the studies. Frogla might know something, but I haven't heard from her in a while though. I hope she is doing ok! I think she is just having a rough time and trying to focus more on her marriage so I completely understand. I think for the most part everyone is just trying to put their life back together, but it is hard with all the stuff going on in the news lately, it's definitely a trigger for some of us.

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gracevslaw
Has anybody heard anything new? How's is everybody doing? LLG, did you have any other episodes of "floating"?

I recently saw that a letter had been posted on 2 of the Delphi boards by a trumpet member. They said it was their "last post"

@ ryyra Interesting, did they specify why?

@LLG your inbox is full.

@ryyra do you know which trumpeter said that?

@saleh saleh your inbox is full

@LLG your inbox if full

Yes, I know which one. It was Trent.

why did that flock member say it was his "last" post? what does that mean?

LLG, your inbox is full again.

I don't know why he said that.

It could be because he was warned at both of those forums that it's not cool to 'post-n-run' So to speak.
To just go there for no reason but promoting The Letters and maybe even to recruit, but not be willing to answer questions, address issues, defend his position or the claims in The Letters... all that is not considered okay by most hosts/hostesses on Delphi.

So he was told at both of those forums that he couldn't do that.

That could be why. Or maybe there's some other reason. If it's some other reason, I wouldn't have a clue any more than anyone else would.

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LLG
frogla,

In the article about psychopaths it mentions the leaders inability to have true emotions and be sympathetic of their members suffering. I'll recount one such instance that happened to me. I shared with Tim and Amy a very harsh experience I went through at home while trying to obey the letters. The reason was because I wanted to hear a letter that I knew one of the other prophets in the group had apparently received for me months prior, I had heard that the letter told me how much God loved me. I needed to hear that at that moment. Amy seemed fairly genuine in her sympathetic response, but Tim, while his words were meant to be sympathetic, seemed empty. I needed to feel loved and accepted, but I'm not sure I ever experienced a time when Tim would actually portray love or sympathy. There were times in our studies where he seemed to be loving, but never in personal experiences, it definitely looking back now seems like it was staged emotion only.

I relate to you on this LLG, the letters are very enticing and they sound real, they sound like God talk, the hope of the rapture, the promise of the set date, and Timothy seeming genuine and sincere, but only from a distance and when he has the time.

I had some serious issues I needed help with but Timothy would never even give me the time to talk with me in private, he would only divert me to Trent. When he did this it made me feel like he was trying to hide something or like he didn't want me to get too close to him.

It also didn't help that it seemed like Trent counseled me with things in a condescending demeanor (I no longer hold any ill will or resentment towards any of the members but I was made to feel like I was a horrible person from the start because of my questions, thoughts, or struggles instead of being able to have someone to confide in) as well as told/ counseled me to do things that were in contradiction to the letters. That sent me in spiraling because I was under the assumption that since Timothy was an all knowing prophet (who was supposedly humble, compassionate, loving and cared so much for his 'flock') would let Trent 'counsel' me that Trent must know what he is talking about, instead I was being pulled in two opposite directions and left more confused and abandoned than I came.

Some days I feel so weak and reclusive and I find myself wanting to run back to 'safety' in the letters/ flock (but of course for the most part I have been ostracized-which makes it a little more easy, but makes me curious as to the fruit the letters produce. It's like all Timothy has to do is give the ok and they all turn on you or frown upon on you)

But most days I just want to break down and cry because I feel so helpless and lost and find it hard to trust anyone and I am always afraid God is mad at me and find myself 'floating' throughout the day and I don't even need a trigger, just isolation. I know, I need help.

Post-Cult Trauma Syndrome

After exiting a cult, an individual may experience a period of intense and often conflicting emotions. She or he may feel relief to be out of the group, but also may feel grief over the loss of positive elements in the cult, such as friendships, a sense of belonging or the feeling of personal worth generated by the group’s stated ideals or mission. The emotional upheaval of the period is often characterized by “post-cult trauma syndrome”:

* spontaneous crying
* sense of loss
* depression & suicidal thoughts
* fear that not obeying the cult’s wishes will result in God’s wrath or loss of salvation
* alienation from family, friends
* sense of isolation, loneliness due to being surrounded by people who have no basis for understanding cult life
* fear of evil spirits taking over one’s life outside the cult
* scrupulosity, excessive rigidity about rules of minor importance
* panic disproportionate to one’s circumstances
* fear of going insane
* confusion about right and wrong
* sexual conflicts
* unwarranted guilt

The period of exiting from a cult is usually a traumatic experience and, like any great change in a person’s life, involves passing through stages of accommodation to the change:

* Disbelief/denial: “This can’t be happening. It couldn’t have been that bad.”
* Anger/hostility: “How could they/I be so wrong?” (hate feelings)
* Self-pity/depression: “Why me? I can’t do this.”
* Fear/bargaining: “I don’t know if I can live without my group. Maybe I can still associate with it on a limited basis, if I do what they want.”
* Reassessment: “Maybe I was wrong about the group’s being so wonderful.”
* Accommodation/acceptance: “I can move beyond this experience and choose new directions for my life” or...
* Reinvolvement: “I think I will rejoin the group.”

Passing through these stages is seldom a smooth progression. It is fairly typical to bounce back and forth between different stages. Not everyone achieves the stage of accommodation / acceptance. Some return to cult life. But for those who do not, the following may be experienced for a period of several months:

* flashbacks to cult life
* simplistic black-white thinking
* sense of unreality
* suggestibility, ie. automatic obedience responses to trigger-terms of the cult’s loaded language or to innocent suggestions
* disassociation (spacing out)
* feeling “out of it”
* “Stockholm Syndrome”: knee-jerk impulses to defend the cult when it is criticized, even if the cult hurt the person
* difficulty concentrating
* incapacity to make decisions
* hostility reactions, either toward anyone who criticizes the cult or toward the cult itself
* mental confusion
* low self-esteem
* dread of running into a current cult-member by mistake
* loss of a sense of how to carry out simple tasks
* dread of being cursed or condemned by the cult
* hang-overs of habitual cult behaviors like chanting
* difficulty managing time
* trouble holding down a job

Most of these symptoms subside as the victim mainstreams into everyday routines of normal life. In a small number of cases, the symptoms continue.

* This information is a composite list from the following sources: “Coming Out of Cults”, by Margaret Thaler Singer