changedagain Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> The Jewel wrote:
> Looks like they are still peddling the
> literature under the Living Word banner and
> logo.
>
> I like the fact that you can not only purchase
> items, but donate to the 'ministry.':
> /s
>
> Donate
> Thank you for supporting the ministry of The
> Living Word.
>
> Donate with PayPal button

I’ll pass. I donated enough over the time I was there. :-(

This is highly recommended

[youtu.be]

Thanks for posting the link, puddington.

I wish there was a way to shut down that damn site. [livingwordpublications.org]

I am really connecting with the videos from the living word cult that are on you tube. It's helping me heal from the pain of what happened and validating the fact that I wasn't insane when I ran away from it.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/09/2023 04:39AM by katnmouse91265.

"This culture will not change."
Post by 'reveal' from September of 2018:

Posted by: reveal
Date: September 06, 2018 09:37PM

I love what everyone has been posting lately. I feel like so many of us have been holding our tongues for a very long time and we have somehow collectively realized that the time has come to SPEAK UP! Someone mentioned recently the concept of "doing your own thing" and do I ever relate to that. I was certainly labeled as such on many occasions. Oddly, when I look back at the times when I wasn't super involved in the church and wasn't submitting to any shepherds (tsk tsk) those were the times when I was actually functioning the best in my life. Sure I had ups and downs and heartaches, regular life stuff...but it wasn't this intense psychological war zone like it was for me when I became involved and submitted to TLWF leadership. To be honest, the only reason I did give myself to submit in the first place was because I was made to feel so "less than", so unloved, so marginalized by the people that were supposed to be my family because I wasn't. I came to the conclusion that well, this is what I had to do to be accepted so I had better get on board. And thus began the worst years of my life. No joke.

I spoke recently with an old friend of mine who was never in the church, and when I was finally honest with her about how I had been raised in this bizarre cult, she felt free to be honest with me. She said that once when she and her boyfriend came to a church sponsored function on my invitation, on their way home she said to him, "I think she is in a cult!" We had a good LOL over that, but it also saddened me. She could see it so clearly, but I was completely blind. How could I not be? We were completely immersed, discouraged from relating to the outside world in any real way, made to fear it even. The truth is that the friends I have made outside the church over the years have oftentimes proven to be far deeper and more genuine than those I had in the church. It made me realize how shallow so many of my church relationships really were. We were fed lines about being family, and told that the relationships are born out of the work, and so we labored together and built Rick three bars to get drunk at church, and five-star facilities for the pleasure of a relatively small group of elite, and made Gary & Marilyn's meals, cleaned their house (while they had two assistants on staff) and any other number of endless projects that were put before us. Not one of which involved helping ANYONE in the community, no encouragement to get out there and help the underprivileged or be socially conscious. I realized one day that, for the most part, all of these people I had worshipped with and labored with for so many years didn't even really know me, nor I them. We weren't given the time! We were too busy laboring for Jesus! This became all the more evident when we left the church, because NO ONE has even asked us why they haven't seen or heard from us. Family my ass.

On another current topic of conversation, I am sickened hearing about this plan to implement a team of overseeing ministries that will allegedly have "one equal voice" but still includes mean-spirited, power-drunk individuals and is still meant to be at the top of the divine order chain. It is still being preached that submission and divine order are necessary, but oh, "there is no hierarchy". I call bullshit. I am so sick of having divine order shoved down my throat. And why does it always have to mean some pyramidal idea of order? They could easily restructure it to be circular, level, equal. More of an organized way of doing things rather than a chain of command that does not allow the "little people" to have a voice. And for God's sake, let people make their own fucking life decisions! Teach people to navigate their own way in life and cultivate intuition and good decision-making skills. Stop dictating to them and telling them that YOU know God's will for their lives. Why does this demand for total involvement and total renunciation of your will to another HUMAN BEING continue to be a theme?

Also, even if Rick & Lorena Holbrook are permanently ousted, every single one of the people mentioned for that leadership team (Phyllis & Craig, Silas & Shuma, Steve & Becky, etc.) are guilty of treating sheep at a minimum unjustly, but mostly cruelly. The hierarchy will continue, because that is the culture that Gary & Marilyn created when they continued to allow themselves to be put on a pedestal, worshipped essentially as gods, and waited on hand and foot. Their leaders are only emulating them! This culture will not change. Get out while you can still salvage a good portion of your life. I agree with everyone else that has said life on the outside is BRILLIANT! The trials and tribulations that the Walk labels "battle" are really just the fruit of what they are sowing. You sow shit, you eat shit. Plain and simple. Over here on the other side, there is freedom and peace, genuine relationships and LOVE that does not require you to be anything but YOU. And also does not require you to clean their toilet. (snark)

"God's will for their lives", sounds like something my parents would have hammered into me a million times. I spent my whole life trying to figure out "God's will for my life", because I couldn't find a purpose. Now I know there's no such thing as "God's will". I still don't have a purpose, but at least now I can accept that it's okay.

I don't want to detract from the rest of this conversation, but I remember back in YASP I felt like I had more connections and genuine friendships than I could ever get while in school. When I reconnected with some of those friendships years later I couldn't figure out why they acted like they hardly even knew me. Because of my parents I was basically living in two worlds and couldn't form connections or make friends in either one.

During YASP I believed the work we were doing was actually for the community.... I was so wrong. I couldn't even grasp that this whole thing was a cult until a couple of weeks ago. I just thought my parents were super zealous religious people who couldn't be reasoned with. Growing up I never knew what it was like having a safe-space of someone you can talk to, or knew what boundaries were.

I finally told my parents last week that I no longer believe in God and that I've been using psychedelic drugs to cope with depression and mental illness.

I'm surprised to hear they still love me. I've always been terrified to say anything.

reveal wrote:
Over here on the other side, there is freedom and peace, genuine relationships and LOVE that does not require you to be anything but YOU.

True

katnmouse91265 wrote:
I am really connecting with the videos from the living word cult that are on you
tube. It's helping me heal from the pain of what happened and validating the fact that I wasn't insane when I ran away from it.

The decision to leave was rooted in sanity--but the toxic culture we all were immersed in made it seem otherwise. It's refreshing to think our own thoughts, rather than the thoughts of those who seek to exploit our lives, and get a 'bad spirit' when they can no longer do so.
The line is drawn. :)

Absolutely Changed again. The girl that lived down the street from us went to public school and was not in the church she was more of a friend and I got in way less trouble than I did with the girl I hung out with in the church. If my parents had only known how much trouble me and her could get into. But it didn't matter because she was in the church and Judy wasn't so I wasn't allowed to do things with Judy.

So glad there is no one ruling my friendships now.

The grass is greener on this side of the line.

Changed wrote:

"The decision to leave was rooted in sanity--but the toxic culture we all were immersed in made it seem otherwise. It's refreshing to think our own thoughts, rather than the thoughts of those who seek to exploit our lives, and get a 'bad spirit' when they can no longer do so.
The line is drawn. :)"

Oh, yeah! I like that. This time, we draw the line on them. : )


And katnmouse91265, you said,
"So glad there is no one ruling my friendships now."

Yes. The leaders wanted to keep all of us dependent on them forever. Never again!