Firstly...I would like to apologize to brokenbycheryl if my username might appear to make light of your username. I chose bruisednotbroken as my username because I feel so much relief that although I at one time felt as if I were a discarded, broken piece of humanity...through therapy (relating to depression and issues from my childhood and church experiences) I now would call myself a "bruised" individual, but I do not feel broken now. I feel I am "coming together" again. It isnt anything you have said that has caused me to offer an apology...I just thought it might seem as Ive described (making light of your username) and so felt I wanted to clear that up....just in case.

I am forever grateful for the moment I decided to heed what I believe was God's voice....when he told me to "run" from KCF.

I am curious....I have the need inside of me to try and uncover the harmful teachings of churches who are controlling (i.e. KCF) and to share what experiences I have had in their midst.

There is always something inside of me though that "wobbles" when I either disclose my feelings/thoughts/reactions to my experiences, or when I read of the experiences of others, as those posted here on this forum.

Does anyone else get these "wobbly" feelings? I think this is why I refer to myself as "bruised"...cause it still lingers iyswim.

Despite these "wobbly" feelings I will not be deterred from posting, sharing and reading all that is on this forum. I do believe God, in his wisdom, will use this site for his healing purposes.

Onlyme and Polar Bear,

I'm a bit puzzled, to be honest. I really don't know what you think equates to bullying on here. Onlyme made a judgment on [i:58968a0910]us[/i:58968a0910] for "slagging off" KCF, and I for one corrected that.

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I think the way you have judged and bullied someone on this site, to the point where they won't return, is unfortunate and makes me sad.

Hi, Polar Bear. Can you point to some actual instances of bullying on this thread? I looked back over the thread and couldn't see any evidence of it at all. If it's there, please help me see.

I wish we could all meet up. Maybe seeing faces from the past whom are in the same places and trying to heal would be a help. A big mental hug to everyone, the people i know and the people whom i can't figure out who yet. Because a hug can go a long way especially if they have been in similar places.

In response to the comments of Polar Bear and onlyme, no-one has acted in a manner which could be seen as bullying. I am sorry that you felt this to be the case. Polar Bear - no-one is saying we have to start a riot, but look at all the positive feedback and talking that is happening now because we all shared. Please do not put a negative spin on something that is helping so many people whose worlds have fallen apart. We are trying to create a place where these things can be talked about in order to help the healing process. Please help us with this.

We have all suffered things that are too painful or humiliating to put into words (including me), but if something is helping people how can that be bad or judgmental? Maybe your healing cannot take place until you can accept what other people need to say without seeing it as bullying or judgment on an individual. That is not the point of this forum.

Some of you may know who I am (Trina). Trust me when I say this, I do not want other lives destroyed at the hands of Herr Doyle. That is the only reason for my remarks about press, media and the law, it was not to put pressure on anybody - it was just part of my healing process. Please respect that.

Bruisednotbroken; I wonder if I could just clarify, when you say you feel a wobble inside, what are you trying to say? At first I thought you meant like an emotional wobble, like feelings rising, perhaps upset lingering that you thought wasn’t there any more, but after thinking about it I wondered if you meant more of a wobble like when you don’t know whether something you feel is right? Perhaps that you feel your feelings or experiences are not valid? I have a wobble occasionally where I’ve wondered if I’m remembering things wrong, and that what everyone else said is right? I almost doubt myself, or wonder if it’s all ‘the enemies’ lies’? Completely off the mark? (usually!?!)....

Thank you for asking, Liverpool writer, I think it’s important to be clear on things, and this seems to be growing out of a misunderstanding.

“[i:0a79183267]Onlyme made a judgment on us for "slagging off" KCF, and I for one corrected that.[/i:0a79183267]”

What Onlyme said was “[i:0a79183267]can i ask why you have taken that post off your website? it was quite a long post and constuctively talked about using our experiences to support each other and move forward rather than setting up a 'slag KCF off' website up[/i:0a79183267]”

What Onlyme was referring to was my own posting on the other site (now here too) which actually said “[i:0a79183267]This (website) is a perfect opportunity for us all to explore and share our experiences. To help one another grow and move on. Or it can be a place where we come to be bitter and ‘bite back’ at those who hurt us.[/i:0a79183267]”

I’m pretty sure Onlyme’s question and comment were not meant as an offence; perhaps the communication of meaning through words has not been proficient enough in conveying the real feeling or meaning? I can speak clearly for myself in that my posting was originally intended as an encouragement. I too think that a group, public, and hopefully loving setting is a good place to work through feelings, and to encourage one another. However, I think if this does become a place were we just sit and play a game of “isn’t this awful” for months on end, I don’t think that is healthy. Yes things are awful, don’t get me wrong. There is a time to grieve, and perhaps this is that time. But there is a time to grown too, and maybe we can facilitate growth in one another…

I have to say I agree totally with what Rosebud has just said. The thought occurs to me that KCF are a charity (maybe I am wrong, but I seem to recall this), could we maybe get the charity Ombudsman involved in this?

To onlyme and Polar Bear, I am sorry if you feel that anything bullying or judgmental has been said to you, Rosebud is right - there are a lot of people on this site who are angry and hurt trying to get it out. You have to remember that a lot of them have never spoken about this. Please show them the courtesy and respect that you expect from us, and please be assured that no-one on this site is out to bully or judge anyone else. We had enough of that from the fellowship. Please do not let Cheryl's divide and conquer still run your life, lets all support each other and help the healing process along.

Sometimes when people are angry they do rant, but none of it is aimed at you - lets all remember who we are really angry at here and focus it on them rather than turning on each other.

I hope the negative comments have not put anyone off this site, we all need to stick together like we were never allowed to do once we had left KCF. Lets concentrate on rebuilding our lives and healing the hurt than sniping.

By the way, in case you hadn't guessed, I'm Becky. I don't feel the need to be anonymous because there is nothing they can do to me that they have not already tried. Its time to be honest for me, there is no point in hiding anymore - she doesn't scare me now!

Take care guys xxxxx

Just bumping this up, as there seems to be a blank page four at the moment...!

Yes ,
Liverpool Writer poor old page four does look bare doesnt it lol.........

I did post something before. Don,t know where it has gone too.Maybe i have broke a rule or something? Posted it about 5.30