Laughed out loud at the closing comment in your last post Al Duff![/ But the story of your experience with Miss T. confirms the conclusion I finally reached after much inner conflict and confusion (as mentioned a few pages ago). A major reason that SMC has been so dangerous and damaging is theadmixture of truth and error, real and pseudo-spiritual experience.

Like a lot of people, I was deeply shaken by the financial scandal of ?1987 and almost left but as always happened in these situations, leaders swooped round to keep you close, as Mary did with me when the lovely McConnachie family left. To ensure I wasn’t troubled by it. Which of course we all were, as with how we felt when many others left then and again, later, when I was asked to remove bible class photos from the church wall because they included someone who was no longer in the church.
And yes, Phoebe2, the mixture of truth and error.

Hi Al Duff,

Same here - my baptismal verse written by Elizabeth Taylor (given by Mary Black on the night) has stayed with me all my life, whether I go to church / believe or not. I remember it by heart but don’t think I still have the wee paper. I was 10 years old & 50 years later still totally applicable.

Btw @ ALL - any thoughts on my last post? It seems to have been forgotten in the great E Taylor discussion thereafter :-) :-)

Greetings to all

Hi GirlWiston!
I wanted to reply to your post that you mentioned but felt I’d said too much so he was waiting for others.
In the absence of that, I will say, I thought your ideas were excellent and could be really helpful for anyone else reading here who is as yet undecided.
You gave two questions: what made you leave? and how did you get on thereafter? At least that was the gist of it. I think I’ve probably answered most of that first part personally but maybe some others could say, what made them eventually leave, and how did they adjust thereafter?
Our journey ‘adjusting thereafter’ was not smooth, being suddenly cut off from all we had known for the best part of 20 years & I’m finding ourselves with outbthere with three kids aged from 12 down to 8 years old. Having said that, the huge relief kind of outweighed any difficulty.
I look forward to hearing stories from others!

Hi GirlWiston
I’ve had some thoughts about your list of questions. I’m not able to give a lot of details because I’m still not comfortable with revealing my identity on here and personal details would give too much away. You left Struthers a long time ago, GirlWiston, whereas many posters on the Forum have left SMC in more recent years and might be wary of revealing too much.

All I can say is that I left SMC one day and never went back, ever. My reasons for leaving built up gradually over a number of years until I decided enough was enough and I got out. My reasons were:
- seeing gifted people being sidelined, ignored and replaced by others who were the leaders’ new favourites,
- controlling teaching from leaders, affecting lifestyle, prayer, time, relationships etc,
- the setting up of Cedars School and the subsequent focus on the running of the school, the iPad carry-on, and consequently neglect of other church activities,
- lack of interest in evangelism locally,
- lack of Bible reading and study in both leaders and congregants,
- hypocrisy and superior attitudes to other Christians in the lives of Struthers members.

The hardest part after exiting SMC was having to leave friends behind. Some still don’t speak to me if I see them at the shops. There’s nothing you can do about that.
I did seek help with my recovery after my Struthers involvement from Christian counselling. I felt so free after that but it did take time and wasn’t instant. I found a new Bible-believing church where there is no unhealthy control and where I’m happy and I still have my Christian faith. I have made new friends.

That’s my story.

Thanks Rensil. Noted.
We must’ve left around 2006 just for interest.
What was ‘the iPad carry on’?

A number of things have crossed my mind when noting recent experiences and observations. First of all, well done to all the folks who have shared their own stories. It is good that folks feel able to share different experiences and perspectives. That in itself is a huge step forward, as what happened decades ago was that people who left were totally isolated. They were frequently told that no-one else had any sort of problems and as a result felt it must all be their fault. That was hardly the case though, as even things like limiting the group of friends to those in the church then advising these friends not to speak to someone who has left leaves people in a very vulnerable position. No wonder there are so many people were and are unhappy with the lack of care.

It is now very clear that the idea that “it was just me” is the exact opposite of the case. If there are some folks who managed to leave without trauma, they are the exception, as the most common experience by far is that people have struggled in some way. Quite a number of the testimonies on this site also include a statement along the lines of, “I thought it was just me”, so thanks folks for sharing, whether anonymously or openly.

That observation that there are so many people who have struggled also made me think of a key point of Scots Laws which is Res ipsa loquitur or "the thing speaks for itself". It means that the mere occurrence of an accident can, in certain circumstances, suggest negligence on the part of the defendant.

The doctrine allows the court to infer that the accident would not have happened if proper care had been taken, even without direct proof of negligence.

This is quite important as it changes the burden of proof. Normally it is the complainant (“the pursuer”) who bears the burden of proof and has to provide evidence of negligence. Where res ipsa loquitur applies this is reversed – the burden of proof shifts to the defender who has to explain the accident and to provide evidence that it occurred without fault on their part.

As I said above, the doctrine allows the court to infer that the accident would not have happened if proper care had been taken, even without direct proof of acts of negligence.

I think there is now overwhelming evidence that people have been hurt by Struthers. If that was just one person, that person would have to provide evidence to show how Struthers was responsible. I believe that the testimonies on this forum however provide considerable evidence of things that “would not ordinarily occur if proper care is taken”. That being the case, it seems pretty clear that “the thing speaks for itself” and res ipsa loquitur applies.

In both common sense and in law, that shifts the burden of proof to the defendant to try to explain how this could have occurred without fault on their part.

That is why the generic letter of complaint posted by Friendly Face and the lack of any attempt to show they were not negligent is so important. Without any specific evidence to the contrary, it is really hard to believe that the things listed on this forum could have happened without negligence on the part of the Struthers leaders. The burden of proof therefore lies with them. If they do not reverse their earlier decision and seek to respond to issues that have been raised everyone including the Courts, the Charity Commission and Companies House are entitled to believe that they have been negligent.

I suspect that has very profound personal implications for the Trustees.

Hi All. I think I posted here many years ago but can’t for the life of me remember my login details. I have been lurking again for a while and loving the recent content. So it is only right that I throw in my tuppence worth.

I escaped from SMC in the mid 1990s, as I emerged into adulthood. I was brought up in the church, mainly in Greenock. I had a great childhood but I must say that SMC cast a bit of a shadow! Like many others, I have fond memories of some of the kinder, dare I say it, more “human” members of the church.

I remember, however, being petrified of Miss Taylor. This was probably triggered by one particular incident. I was maybe 9 or 10 and zoning out a bit as she descended from preaching into the inevitably prolonged prayer time that followed. I was absentmindedly staring at her as everyone else was bowing their heads and she rebuked me. “How dare you look with such impertinence at the mouthpiece of the Holy Spirit”. I mean, I was probably just daydreaming about playing football, as many young boys do. But my bad, I guess!

I do feel sorry for the kids who came later and had to go to Cedars School as well as the church. How on earth did they learn about the real world? I only had to contend with dodging Mary Black in the corridors of Greenock Academy! It also makes me mad that thousands of pounds of collection money from SMC congregations was used to prop up this second rate private school. A very misguided vanity project.

I must say I have had a few genuine lolz in the last few days from the forum and thank everyone for their contributions. Challenging HB on the importance of fasting must have taken some nerve!! However I feel genuinely appalled at some of the recollections. I think I can imagine which “Radical Alternative” members believed that they were the only ones holy enough to be allowed to have a romantic relationship. What incredible hubris.

So, anyway, I think SMC has cured me of organised religion forever. Now I just seek the beauty and kindness that exists in the world and aim to share it where possible. I am most likely to have a spiritual experience sipping a good glass of red whilst listening to the St Matthew Passion.

And I still occasionally take the time to actively enjoy doing normal things on a Saturday night 30+ years later.

Hi dmccThank you for that balanced and honest reflection of your time in SMC. Your humour is not lost on us and your story adds to the growing body of information concerning both the leaders and the ordinary members.

Cheers….


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Hi Rensil,

Thanks & totally appreciate that many people are uncomfortable giving information which may reveal their identity. I am doing this 36 years later & started posting again mainly because of the lovely comments about my Dad.

One thread which I see a lot is « I left & I’ve never been back » same for me, same for you & thankfully many others.

I totally identify with your points, especially the lack of evangelism. Even though I hated going to my Dad’s open airs in Greenock (my school friends would pass & giggle) at least he was one of the few who did do this faithfully every Saturday.

I’m glad you have found peace & a new safe environment. This is so important for you firstly, and for others to know.

Each generation suffered differently. Same methods, same (lack of) values transmitted.

If I may: were they really your « friends » if they won’t talk to you now? I’m sure you have found nice genuine friends now.

Liz25 thanks too for your information. So nice to reconnect :-)

DMMC Hi there, I think we are the same generation. Love your comment about organised religion. I feel I went to church for a whole lifetime in my first 23 years: Monday bible study (kind of), Tuesday prayer meeting, Wednesday Youth Group, Thursday (free - really? Yippee) Friday Glasgow church, Saturday night, Sunday - now this needs a page of its own: 1) go early to set out communion 2) Sunday morning church 3) afternoon Sunday school in Port Glasgow 4) Evening service Greenock 5) Prayer meeting upstairs with miss Taylor (& Mrs Morris - little rebellious ones) Whew! Glad to get back to school on Monday for a rest :-)

Sorry for my tongue in cheek but listing it helps!

Greetings to all