Re: Has Anyone Ever Heard of Radiant Life Church in Sacramento
Posted by:
timeforchange
()
Date: October 22, 2008 10:42AM
This will be my last post. God has made it clear to me that if I go any further I will be trying to fight His battle. I have come to stark revelations over the last several days. The first is that while I want to see justice, the only just judge is God. For the last several days I have lamented over many horrid situations that I have seen. I have awakened with levels of anger I didn't know a person could have, I have grieved to a depth that I didn't think possible.
God continues to take me to I Samuel. Eli and Saul both did what they thought was ok and permitted evil to happen. Men were not allowed to bring them judgment, only God could. When God sent those to speak for Him with no response from either Eli or Samuel; He acted, He brought swift judgment. In His perfect timing God made it right, He brought justice. But God sent only one messenger, one time. I feel I have gone to; I have spoken; now I must learn to trust God.
David did. Although there were times he crossed the line, he came and repented. He realized that judgment was Gods. I believe for me maybe the lines have been blurred a time or two. I need to trust God, just as David did.
I have also considered how party lines have been drawn and irreparable damage has been done. God speaks about unity. There is serious division. There is a chasm that is so wide; it will take significant and miraculous circumstances to heal it. I am more than positive God never wanted this type of division within His people. This grieves God and it grieves me. I never wanted to bring division. However, I can tell you while repentance has brought reconciliation in many ways; I am divided from some I love deeply. I can't help but consider how God must feel.
Truth is I have come to a conclusion... I must get out of the way. I must allow myself to trust God. I must listen to His voice. His voice is speaking to me, "Will you trust me to defend the brokenhearted." Let me tell you, I WANT TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS! But alas, it's not mine to kick.
I sat in business meeting appalled as I watched it become a three ring circus. I heard the lies and half-truths. As I sat God made it very clear, I was not to speak a word. You see anything spoken now is on deaf ears. Decisions are made and sides have been chosen.
I lost respect for some I once held dear. I don't hate anyone. But I walked away with the knowledge we are fighting something much bigger than us. Only God can fight on this level. While I think a public forum is a splendid idea, I also realize that it just won't happen. I won't happen for many reasons, the main one is there is far too much to lose and far too much to hide for those in leadership. To continue to protect the hole they are in is their only option. Anything that comes out now only causes greater implication and misfortune.
This isn't just about Tony Cunningham anymore. This isn't even about the elders or remaining leadership of RLC anymore. This is about the body of Christ. This is about God being allowed to be God. He is the only just judge.
I am not saying stop fighting. Our fight is not about flesh and blood. Our fight is with principalities and darkness. Darkness merely uses people. The only way for Satan to hurt the heart of God is to hurt His people. He's done a great job thus far. Let's continue to pray.
Let's continue to fight in prayer. Pray against the darkness and ask God to expose it with His light. He will, He has, and He is doing it even now as I type. There is hope. Many eyes have been open and people are getting free. Healing will come to all of us.
I have also pondered the issue of anonymity. Tony wants to know who is bloggin', who is speaking badly. The people on this forum want people to come on and use their name for validity to the stories. I asked God about what I should do. I came to a conclusion, it's not about my name; it's about my heart. You see the Bible tells me there is "no other name in heaven by which we are saved” Only the name of Jesus matters. So if I can be His light, show Him to the darkness, who cares what my name is. I want people to see my heart. This name thing has been the problem all along. Just in the book of Corinthians, Paul addresses this. Today it is not different. I don't want to follow Tony, I don't want to follow a discipler, or any one else for that matter. I want to follow only Yahweh!
Yahweh is my salvation. He is my rescue. I believe it is time for me to let Him be my defense. I believe I have been obedient thus far. I was supposed to speak to elders, I was supposed to speak to RLC members via my posts, and now I think I am to end here with this encouragement to all, no matter what side of the battle field you are on, this is a time for repentance, reconciliation, and restoration.
We are all in various places in that journey. Some need to repent, some need to reconcile with God and others; However, I believe we all need restoration. There is so much healing to be had. God wants to restore our hearts, which is His business. That is his goal, to restore us for relationship with Him.
This has been a long taxing season; war exhausts everyone, including the innocent. There are many innocent caught in the crossfire. We all need to find them and love them. We all are in need of love. The only way this will happen is if we put down our swords and allow God to pick up His.
I love you all! I am so grateful for your journeys; both those who have posted and those who have just read. I love the elders of RLC. Yes, I even love Tony Cunningham. You see love is not contingent on behavior; it is based on my ability to apprehend the heart of God. He loves us all unconditionally, no matter what we do. I know personally I have sinned and transgressed against him many times and many ways. He has forgiven me many times. It is time for me to forgive and love. This doesn't mean I forget. That would be stupid. I have to learn something from all of this. Right now I am learning to allow God to do the battle and to trust Him even when it looks like the other side might have won. Which by the way, nobody really wins during war, everybody suffers.