Re: Turning Point Church World Outreach Center-Tell Your Story
Date: September 19, 2010 05:36AM
I think its worth comparing TPCs "reconciliation" letter with letters from other leaders who engaged in spiritual abuse.
First is a copy of Jeff's Letter. It is then followed by another letter from another church leader at a different church. Your thoughts and insights are welcomed.
Dear Brothers and Sisters in Christ,
I am writing this letter on behalf of myself and the elders of Turning Point Church. The
purpose of this letter is to make right some wrong actions and attitudes that may have
impacted you. It is with a heavy heart that we speak of these failures, and ask for your
grace and forgiveness as we work to heal and address these issues and continue in the good
work that God has for Marysville.
While God has done many amazing things at Turning Point Church over the years, this
letter will be focusing on areas for which repentance is necessary. We write as ones who
have also been hurt, part of the problem, and now seek to be a part of God’s solution and
redemption.
One of the things we are learning is that over the years there was a spirit of fear and
intimidation that took us to places we did not want to go. Looking back we wish we would
have functioned in a greater awareness of what was taking place.
We have also come to realize that a spirit of control led to an overly authoritative
environment. This has hurt individuals at TPC, our reputation in the community, and our
ability to serve Jesus well within His kingdom. For this our hearts are grieved and we are
examining our doctrine closely to ensure this does not happen in the future.
We are thankful for Jackie Singer’s many years of faithful service at Turning Point Church
and how she touched many lives. Looking back, we regret how we handled things with her
and her family. We have put into motion meetings with Jackie and our leadership to help
bring clarity and understanding to what took place. Our deepest desire is for a restorative
redemptive process so that we may worship together anywhere in Jesus name.
We are working with a leadership consultant who is helping us walk through these issues.
We ask for your grace, as it will take focused time and much prayer. We are humbly looking
to God for complete restoration and the sacred opportunity to rebuild His church according
to His plan. It is our desire that this letter will encourage your own healing if you have been
impacted. We pray that God will use this for his glory in the future and that we would learn
from our mistakes and not return to the bondages of the past.
In Christ’s love,
Senior Pastor Jeff Barnes and the Elders of Turning Point Church
And now a letter from Brad, a former leader in an abusive church:
Storms reveal the god we serve. My god was clearly people;
specifically pastors and leaders I served in my mid and late 20s.
But, really…it came down to ME.
As a young man learning what it was to be a husband and minister, I was more often scared than confident.
When it came to confronting what I knew to be right and wrong in people’s lives…
rather than speaking up on their behalf or asking ”why should they be told that?” or “handled that way?”
I buckled under pressure…the pressure to make my leaders happy. Several times I worked so hard to stifle
the Lord’s proverbial “jab to the ribs” that came in form of a racing heart beat or feeling as though I knew what
I was being asked to do or say was wrong.
Rather than “question my spiritual authority” I simply obeyed. In those instances and times when I had
the chance to be a voice for the voiceless…I didn’t do it…I didn’t speak up for them. Instead, I convinced myself
that I was wrong and prayed so hard for the Lord to rid me of my rebellious nature. Yet, the desire to say
something or take a stand kept trying to show itself against the leaders in my life.
The people who convinced me that they ”knew best.”
So the storms came. I don’t mean the outright one’s that others can perceive.
The storms I speak of are the ones hurled at us from inside that FEEL as if everyone is noticing.
Your sitting in a room with dominate men who “know” their place and yours… and everyone else’s.
“This is what you need to do…”, or ”You take all her responsibilities from her and have her meet with
someone until we say she’s ready.” and the favorite ”Kick… his… butt, man of God.”
Inside me the wind would blow, and the ship that was my convictions would begin to toss.
I would begin the minds struggle…”If I say anything, question any of those I risk looking like a weak man
and minister. I risk ridicule,punishment or removal. But if I don’t say anything, these people, these friends,
these brothers and sisters get…tossed. “
And I would always choose…ME.
It’s been a process, but the “ship” has become stable in those storms since then.
It helps having the Lord in His rightful place and people who realize my weakness and stand to strengthen me.
As I’ve recounted those years and the friends I had the privilege to walk with as a mentor and even a peer,
my heart has hurt. I did wrong to many of you. If you read this and are one of these “under” my direction in
those years, I am so sorry for how I handled you. I was selfish and serving the wrong master. I took orders
and followed them to lead you even when I knew the way to be hurtful and wrong,
and sometimes I was just hurtful and wrong. In the personal tossing, you got tossed.
Together…Jana and I have no words to mend the past, but we do offer you our sincere apology.
We had no right to be dictators in your life. We repent and ask you to forgive us…we repent and want you to know something.
The representation of God’s heart shown to you during that time was wrong…because we were wrong.
So, whatever the storm may be in your life…whatever waves may crash against the wall of your soul…please know this…YOU ARE LOVED.