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6. PERFECT YOUR PERSONAL FOUNDATION.WHEN BOUNDARIES ARE STRONG AND STANDARDS ARE HIGH, PROBLEMS DISAPPEAR.
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ginahQuote
6. PERFECT YOUR PERSONAL FOUNDATION.WHEN BOUNDARIES ARE STRONG AND STANDARDS ARE HIGH, PROBLEMS DISAPPEAR.
Actually the higher a persons standards are in regards to others actions, thoughts etc, the more likely you are to have problems with people. If you lower your standards of what you believe people should be like, and have tolerance of others actions and thoughts, you will have less problems.
You will have more problems in life when you have very high standards and no tolerance.
I am not saying let everyone run all over you. Everyone definitely has to have boundaries and have certain standards of others. Just to not expect much from most people, and you won't get disapointed and have problems.
For example, lets say you have high standards for other drivers and no tolerance for their actions. hhhmmmm, this is the perfect stage for ROADRAGE.
For example, I was driving the other day with my child in the car with me. Something happened in front of me, I put on my blinker to change lanes, looked behind me, their was a truck, but still plenty of room so I moved over. When I put my blinker on the person behind me sped up so as not to have someone get in front of them, so when I moved over they had to slam on their brakes.
When I moved back over in the other lane this person sped up, started flipping me off, and tried to side ram my vehicle. My son was upset and scared. I had to jerk my wheel and almost go off the road to keep from getting hit. This person had no tolerance and high standards. All because I tried to change lanes and this person sped up to prevent it. All with a small child in the car screaming at this other person as he saw what happened.
If I had also had no tolerance and high standards I could have been someone to slam his vehicle back, or chace them down to "fight". As I have low expectations and high tolerance, I just put the situation down to "moronic behavior" and went on with my day mostly unaffected.
Zero tolerance, High standards, major problems, High tolerance, Lower standards, not as many problems.
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nutrino
Markus.... [b:608bb1daf9] there is something flat out wrong with your mind. [/b:608bb1daf9] There is a bizarre literalism to your thought patterns which is sometimes associated with brain injury. I suggest obtaining a psychometric work up to see if you can pinpoint the issue. Your personality structure is generally not one that is comfortable seeking therapy, however I think you would benefit greatly from professional help, assuming you can find a good fit between yourself and the psychologist or psychiatrist. Sometimes these rigidities are seen in head trauma, PTSD, undiagnosed micro stroke, or they may have resulted from traumatic or repressive childhood experiences. In any case, my opinion is that you need help and you would be wise to seek help. You aren't well. That's obvious.
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anon0820
We are losing sight of what this message board is all about. I would like to research this site for more information, not to see bantering between the users.
Let's play nice, and let's stay focused on the subject matter without getting everyone's dander up. :shock: :roll:
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anon0820
I have often heard that LGAT's tell people that the judgment they are hearing from others is not a reflection on them. It is that person's interpretation of the criticism of how they see this person.
I thought it is a positive thing to hear feedback from someone you are close with. So, if I tell a person (one who attended an LGAT) that they are sending a message that they are being selfish or cold, then that is MY interpretation. The 'LGAT' person should not be affected???? :?:
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ginahQuote
3. ELIMINATE TOLERATIONS IN ALL THEIR FORMS. TOLERATIONS ARE THE BREEDING GROUND OF PROBLEMS.
Sorry, just have to say, TOLERANCE towards others in this world is what we need more of, not less of.
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Rswinters
I should [b:b3db1c48f6]not[/b:b3db1c48f6] look at myself? What I am bringing to the conflict?