Wow. I'm utterly dumbfounded. Wow.
After my first response, she tells me how "hurt" I appear. I write back these exact words:
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First of all, there's one thing that needs to be clear. Your email did not hurt or upset me. The truth is that you have very little, if any, power to hurt me.
To which she responds:
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I apologize for not getting your communication clearly. You're last e-mail left me with the impression that you are pissed off at me, and hurt. If you are pissed at me, I totally deserve that.
And then rants on for two pages full of language and I can't understand. [u:eb5e7e1828]All[/u:eb5e7e1828] of it, very obviously, lek-speak. Here are the "good parts." (Ellipses denote clipped text.) I'm hoping that someone who's been through Landmark can translate some of this, if there even is a translation. Warning: Those of you with bad experiences may shudder. I've never done anything Landmark-related, and the language even makes [i:eb5e7e1828]me[/i:eb5e7e1828] cringe.
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Yeah I never respected you as my friend... I wasn't respecting you by not understanding your communications clearing. I wasn't respecting you when I gave up on our friendship... The impact that has on me is that I never really got to know you, and what you are really all about, and what you are up to in life. I robbed myself of that opportunity. That has left me with feeling frustrated, angry, and actually very sad. What I've seen recently is that I walk out on people and things in my life before I ever really give them any effort at all. I had this crazy idea that things would never work out at all, and rather than try I would just quit. I'm not committed to that anymore.
Yes, I do respect you now... I will honor your feelings and your feelings toward me. I will never give up on whatever relationship we have (whether it's never talking again, or becoming friends again). In that e-mail I sent you I never said that being your friend again was out of the question. In fact that e-mail was a huge mistake. I handled that situation poorly.
I get that you think Landmark is what disintegrated our friendship. What disintegrated our friendship was me, and the choices that I made. I've said this before and I'll say it again. You do not need to do Landmark Education to have an amazing life. No one needs to do Landmark to have an amazing life. That was never the impression I meant to leave you with and I apologize for that. I care about you, and am committed that you have everything you want for your life. I'm committed that you have an amazing life that you love, that lights you up everyday, where you can't wait to get out of bed in the morning to start your day.
I also what to thank you for reading my e-mails and responding. It really takes something to step up like you have.
The only real reaction that all of this has elicited from me is some fairly severe eye-rolling. Is there anything about this that I should be taking seriously? I'm not being mean in my responses; distant, perhaps, but that's because this all seems so utterly absurd to me.
So... yeah. Wow.