Hi Mork,brokenbyCheryl,littleyellowspider
I have read all the recent posts. I can understand your frustration i wasn't there that long but i could see what direction that the fellowship was going in. I even mentioned it to the few people i was friendly with that it i thought it was becoming a cult. I had many a argument with Ged over it.
There were a lot of people who lived and breathed everything that was preached to them by Cheryl et al these same people are still there many decades later and are now part of the hierarchy because thats what there aim was and didn't care who they stepped on to get there.
If your face didn't fit they looked down on you!

Here is an interesting podcast on Religious Trauma Syndrome. Helpful for ex fundamentalists


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[new.exchristian.net]

Also a site that is helpful for lots of resources.

More on religious trauma syndrome


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8 steps to help you on your way. There are so many help and support groups online, and even therapy. Don’t struggle on your own.

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Here are the 12 symptoms of Religious Trauma Syndrome. I know I definitely have it, I remember I used to feel anxious before a KCF meeting, as I walked through the door I used to brace myself for the stares from the welcomers. Always a dreadful experience. I would then scan the room to find a “ safe “ chair somewhere to hide, from all the dirty looks. My heart would be racing. The worst would be during the teaching, dreading the accusatory stance of the sermon.

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Marlene Winells book is very good (just having a look at some of the links), Leaving the Fold I think its called. It has some lovely exercises in it to help you take care of yourself and make yourself feel safe. The exchristian site looks interesting.

The way our brain tends to work is very much about survival. When a tiger/car comes flying toward us our instincts take over and we leg it. When we're not running away from tigers our brain is telling us that how we've lived so far has kept us alive so we'll continue doing what we're doing. Without even realising it, totally subliminal, our brain is saying "well done, keep it up." You see this in people who are in abusive relationships all the time; the brain says "this has kept you alive, well done, keep it up" and they stick with the person. Everyone around can see whats going and wondering why they're staying.

The brain can quite easily be hacked, you've only got to watch people like Derren Brown to see that. We all think it won't work on us and then we go out and buy a new iPhone or car. The way spies work to get support when they're away spying is super interesting.

Mind control stages
1. Put people into the fight or flight mechanism - fear overrides normal thinking. The way cults do this is by talking about hell, demons, warfare, by asking which side you're on. I can remember a lot of "demonic warfare" and lots of talk about hell - some of the images have burned (no pun intended) their way into my brain. Lots of talk about the end times too. It's only when you look back decades later that you realise we weren't in the end times at all.
2. Dissociation with self - you’re not yourself. Not your 'true' self anyway. You associate into things that are so big and important, the entire history of humanity and eternity depend on it. Demons, angels, deadening things in your own body and taking on things that are like science fiction. "Lean not on your own understanding."
3. Building habitual compliance. Reward for agreement. One of the things abusers do is they are friendly and warm towards you, then they're cold and dismissive. You long for the warmth so you bend over backwards to try and please them; thats when they've got you. Easier to stay with the familiar than to change.
4. Foster dependency. We need to lean on the leader/group for information and answers. “If you don’t get it right, you will die/go to hell.” You won't survive outside the group, "this is a word from God", the world can't be trusted, nor can your brain or education, or your own intuition, and DEFINITELY don't go on that website!

Religion prevents facing real life Marlene Winell


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Marlene Winell at the ex Mormon conference, this beautifully sums up what we have been talking about on this site for decades now. Enjoy this video, I did!


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M Winell at ex-Mormon conference part 2. Religion can be terrorism. I am grateful that I was not brought up as a child in KCF. By the time I joined I had my own sense of self, my awareness that I could be successful at whatever I put my mind to. I have never lost this. However what does concern me, are the kids that were indoctrinated from an early age, and are still in KCF as adults. I found this video quite disturbing. It might trigger some of you that were raised in KCF as a child. I see it as child abuse.

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