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Having finished college, I decided to do Higher studies in the US. Every day I would do the sudarshana kriya, and would attend the patanjali yoga school at calicut, also read the emails as a ritual. The acharya in the yoga school knew what he was teaching about Yoga. When I was doing Sudarshana Kriya though, I was hyperventillating at the end of the kriya after doing the entire set of breathing , which wasn't part of the package which I had been taught. Inspite of the lack of information, I would continue to do it. I never felt the connection with the yoga acharya, inspite of the enormous wisdom, knowledge and experience he had. Regardless, I respect him for teaching me hatha yoga.

I also started following astrology, which gave me insights into myself. It was very revealing. It predicted that in a particular period the following year, I would come across very important people related to the planet Jupiter / Guru. More on this later ;)

The best thing about the US, when I had come here was the unlimited internet ( now that is somewhat the case in India as well ). What resulted from that was immersing in youtube to quench my spiritual thirst.

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SanthipDecember 4, 2010 at 10:28 PM

One of the videos I had come across was that of a Kundalini Guru, Guru Swami G. The first impression I had after seeing her unprofessional video explaining kundalini symptoms was, who would want to watch her video. Regardless,I did stumble on her website by chance once, and that was about it.

Now .. the big time period came about in my life.. the time when I was supposed to meet someone very special related to the planet Guru in my life, which basically meant a spiritual Guru. I hoped that it would be Nityananda, and I would receive some kind of symbol from his videos. So I was watching some of the leftover videos in his channel. I fell asleep watching one of his videos, and I had a dream in which I was standing in front of an ashram gate, where there were two guardsmen. They wouldn't allow me to enter the ashram and see Nityananda. However I demanded to them that " by the power of divinity within me , I had to see him". The guards reluctantly had to bring Nityananda to the Ashram gates, and when he arrived, I fell at his feet and that was the end of the dream.

I woke up, and surfed around for a bit, and went to the same GuruSwamiG website, and registerd in one of the yahoo groups of the website. In the website she basically said one to decide within a week if they would like to follow the path which she had to offer. I was kind of confused. So I sought the help of one of my Orkut friends, who knew mantra and tantra.

He told me that this guru had a golden aura, which meant that she was a satguru, and she will take care of me.

I had more faith in his words than my decision at that time :D And the funny thing was, I had a vision during my time before coming to the US, about a bald lady who was also fat at the time of Guruvayoor Ekadeshi at the Guruvayoor temple. At that time it didn't make sense. But now it felt to be serendipity to come across this Guru in the astrological period as well.

(Corboy: Confirmation bias? Had he not seen the Guru G video, he perhaps might
never have recalled or recreated the memory of the vision he had at Guruvayoor
Temple. )

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What she had to offer was of immense value, as I would realize being with her for a long time. She had the actual experience of realization/non-duality. She could talk from that point. I was able to be in her presence, when she was holding a retreat for the students under her guidance ( about 30 of them from all around the world , most of them with an awakened kundalini ) . I was able to experience deep consciousness shifts merely being in her presence. She wasn't willing to ego massage any of her students, and would tell them exactly what their problem was right at their face. Many of the students whose ego was bruised, She was indeed a realized being, who walked the talk. My search for a spiritual guru ended there.
.... Contd ( Just one more :)
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((Corboy Note the rationalization of abuse))

SanthipDecember 4, 2010 at 10:29 PM

Once I was convinced of this fact, my attention for Nityananda faded away. Regardless, when a friend told me that Nityananda was caught making out with his devotee, I didn't feel suprised ( inspite of watching over 100s of hours in his youtube videos ).

I realized that he was more of a showman, whose talks would begin with a curtain opening up , and a promotional song/video in the background. Apparently he wasn't also accessible to many of his students, except through the #1000 programs/courses. And he was thus a self-proclaimed guru.

(Corboy: A contrast with how S's original interest in Nithyananda -- to the point
of having had a dream of wanting to enter Nithya's ashram. This is an example
of how people often re-shape memories to validate a change in loyalty. This
reduces cognitive dissonance)

My guru backlashed Nityananda vehmently in her youtube channel, as he was bringing a bad name for genuine satgurus. And Nityananda's students who were blind devotees, would attack back at my Guru with their illogical arguments without looking at the evidence, to which she would again reply point blank at their face.

I can only thank all the gods in finally putting me in the right hands of a genuine Guru. I consider myself incredibly blessed to have access to one as well.