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Holy Hell Gail Treadwell
19 of 27 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars If you don't want your faith in Amma shaken, do not read this book., November 21, 2013
By Hipstorian - See all my reviewsAmazon Verified Purchase(What's this?)
This review is from: Holy Hell: A Memoir of Faith, Devotion, and Pure Madness (Kindle Edition)
It is so difficult to read this book if you love Amma. Be aware of that, and be careful to avoid it if you do not want your faith deeply shaken. Even shredded. It sat in my book bag for several weeks before I could gather the strength to open its pages. What I found was a courageous memoir, a heart-rending tale, and an important caution for those who are so devoted to this Mahatma. The "revelations" show a human side to our beloved Mother that I do not judge. But one thing in particular troubles me greatly. That is Her failure to protect Gayatri from the rapes (multiple) of a co-aspirant... which absolutely enrages me. James Duffy's review puts so well: "the character assassination campaign underway against the author should set off alarm bells." PTSD and rape survivor syndrome may have made her behave the way she did, as told about in the PR-spun and clear efforts at damage control on the ammascandal wordpress site. I am deeply disappointed in the community around Mata Amritanandamayi for lacking the discrimination to see through the "she is crazy" party-line of the U.S. satsang coordinators. Deeply, profoundly disappointed. Y'all are supposed to be about love. Help other customers find the most helpful reviews
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17 of 27 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Bold honest memoir, riveting story, November 20, 2013
By Stephen Hartley (Eugene, OR United States) - See all my reviewsThis review is from: Holy Hell: A Memoir of Faith, Devotion, and Pure Madness (Kindle Edition)
This is a boldly honest memoir and riveting story about the journey of a guru-disciple relationship, from one of the very closest female disciples to Ammachi. While we would like to hear that the guru leads the disciple to eternal bliss, instead it turns into an abusive relationship. The memoir could be a textbook study on how such relationships can go bad, and on how divine and trusting faith can become blind faith. Westerners who read this book will want to "kick the tires" before readily accepting a teacher as their guru.
Having spent two decades with Ammachi, the author undoubtedly showed great courage in breaking from the webs of deception and embarking on a new life. As readers we should be grateful that she was able to accomplish her bold escape to the outside and tell her story. Help other customers find the most helpful reviews
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44 of 57 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A brave act...pranams to Gail., November 18, 2013
By James Duffy "J. Duffy" (Los Angeles) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME) This review is from: Holy Hell: A Memoir of Faith, Devotion, and Pure Madness (Paperback)
Read the book, read Amma's devotees' and Swami's responses....make up your own mind. Are the Amma defenders sharing evidence to contradict Gail's accusations?....or are they merely attacking her character?? Gail Tredwell's book, Holy Hell, gives all a glimpse into the minefield of the traditional Guru disciple path, both the sublime and the horrific aspects. I would like to have heard more about the sublime aspect, so the reader without direct experience of Amma and such Gurus would better understand why she would tolerate such abuse, but regardless, I think Gail has done a great service (!) in sharing her story. Especially since I'm sure she anticipates the massive tidal wave of wrath from devotees and Amma's org to be unleashed against her.
My opinion...
As someone who has spent significant time around Amma (amritapuri ashram resident, tours, etc etc) since 1990, the response to Gail Tredwell's book by Amma / her org / swamis has been profoundly disappointing and revealing in my opinion. Pure character assassination. Their self-delusion being so strong as to blindly enable them to promote immoral rationalizations and lies. I've seen Amma's violence first hand and it isn't pretty. One example, I saw Amma take a brahmacharin by the throat and slam him against a wall. I don't think that Amma is an utter fraud or 'the devil", but she isn't what's claimed by devotees either, that's for sure. Here, I should say, that I've also seen first hand Amma perform numerous, deeply moving acts of love and compassion. What seems to drive these debacles is the inability of devotees to accept their Guru's humanity. I feel I learned this lesson the hard way. The necessity that the Guru be "perfect", all knowing and all powerful...and thus inhuman...ensures that one day the pedestal will crumble. Then whatever greatness the Guru authentically possesses is thrown out with the bathwater by many, while the "true believers" continue to drink the koolaid. Neither option being an accurate portrayal. The traditional Indian "mythic" worldview of "spirituality", "enlightenment" and Gurus must stop if we, as humans, are to evolve beyond the unfailingly, ever-repeating enactment of "fallen Gurus".
The character assassination campaign by Amma *should* set off alarms for everyone, but it won't, except for a small handful of people. And please don't be so clueless to think Amma hasn't signed off on this campaign against Gail. The swami's, her attendant, etc do not do anything without Amma's approval.
Unfortunately, for most, Gail's book will be divisive, separating the believers from the non-believers...aka "Amma is perfect" vs "Amma is a charlatan preying on the weak minded, the devil", etc. There is a third alternative imo, that requires a far more nuanced perspective of what it means to be an evolving human being. It isn't black or white. It's messy, it's complex, it's paradoxical...in other words, it's human. For more, research Spiral Dynamics or Integral Theory etc. Equating "spiritually enlightened" / "divinity" / Self Realization with perfection must end. We're all a work in progress (evolution), and Amma is no exception. Help other customers find the most helpful reviews
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22 of 35 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Heartfelt and eye opening memoir, November 18, 2013
By monica - See all my reviewsAmazon Verified Purchase(What's this?)
This review is from: Holy Hell: A Memoir of Faith, Devotion, and Pure Madness (Kindle Edition)
I would recommend this book to anyone looking for a guru to "fix their life" or thinking that somehow they can justify being mistreated in any relationship. Help other customers find the most helpful reviews
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22 of 38 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A Betrayal of Innocence, November 17, 2013
By Marit Hegge "MH" (Brisbane Australia) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME) Amazon Verified Purchase(What's this?)
This review is from: Holy Hell: A Memoir of Faith, Devotion, and Pure Madness (Kindle Edition)
‘Holy Hell’ is above all a story of innocence and trust betrayed. I bought the book from this site within days of it being released and read it cover to cover almost in one sitting. Have read most of these reviews – the five star and the one star ones, and, like others, have come to the same conclusion that most of one star reviewers had not even read the book. Because if they had they would see that above all Tredwell’s story is one about her quest to find God. That throughout this book she never actually wavers in her belief in God and it is probably for that reason that she suffered such abuse for as long as she did.
She came to Sudhamani Idamannel (Amma) offering her everything. And I do not mean her worldly goods, of which she almost had none at the time. But she came to this guru, who at that point in time was little known outside her local region in Kerala, offering her youth, her innocence, her trust, her devotion, and above all her love of God. She came to Idamannel believing that by offering herself up to this guru that it would bring her even closer to God. From what I can see she was already leading a saintly existence herself at the Sri Ramana Maharshi ashram at Arunachala in the year she spent there before she came to Idamannel. Meditating daily and herself having already undergone some intense mystical experiences, not unlike those described in Idamannel’s biographies. She was also using her meagre financial resources to make meals and feed others, some of the poor near to the ashram and other ashram residents in need of support. So she also, for one so young, was demonstrating much compassion for her fellow beings. Had decided to become vegetarian for that reason. Who knows if she had not met Idamannel where her devotion would have led her. Possibly SHE herself would have started to attract a following. But one thing is for sure, she came offering SO much to this woman.
THAT is what makes this book so shocking. Of how Idamannel possibly never even saw the light in her when she first came to her. Did not even appreciate these special qualities in that young woman in the portrait at the beginning of the book, who is full of so much light and purity. But what she certainly did see was a trusting and gullible young woman, a strong and healthy young woman who wished to serve her and, above all, a white woman, that she could then have accompanying her everywhere to help promote her and bring her to fame.
(name omitted-Corboy) (Nealu) appears to have failed her abysmally after her arrival. A young woman barely 21 who accompanies him to Idamannel’s village , a man committed to a religious life but in his thirties. He then allows her to be used as Idamannel’s servant and the work horse for the community, toiling in the oppressive tropical heat in primitive village conditions preparing meals and doing the washing and other tasks, whilst he, protected by his wealth, his ill health and his gender, opts out of any real responsibility for what is going on, spending extended periods lying around in his hut because of this illness.
What those who have only given this book one star fail to realise, and who condemn Tredwell for her “betrayal” of her guru and her lack of faith is that if anyone did the betraying it was Idamannel. What was taken from this woman was her dream of living in a state of Grace, to be One with God. The vileness of what happened to her at the hands of Balu, Idamannel’s #1, Swami Amritasvarupananda. If such a thing had happened in a Catholic religious community it would become evidence in an enquiry into abuse within the Catholic Church!
Joel Kramer and Dianna Alstad, authors of ‘The Guru Papers: Masks of Authoritarian Power’ , who endorsed this book, would have seen straight away what had happened to Tredwell. The second part of their book’s title – Masks of Authoritarian Power’, which is what I believe is happening in all guru/devotee relationships. The mind games and the tricks these usually very charismatic and invariably narcissistic people use in order to manipulate others and control them. In the case of Idamannel, someone I believe who is one of the most clever and unscrupulous of them, it is ALL about a mask. Preying, as Tredwell says in her final pages, after finally realising the true nature of this woman, on the needy, the desperate, the trusting and above all, the innocent. The much publicised humanitarian works, the hook which Idamannel uses in the West to pull in so many new devotees, and the donations, has now been shown to be nothing other than a hollow PR exercise. The evidence now being out there on the Indian government’s Home Office site that less than 10% of these donations actually are used for real humanitarian projects and that 63% is being held in foreign banks. Another reviewer having provided detailed information.
I believe that this book will become a classic in the genre of guru exposés, and a text that many will refer to in future years. It is very well-written and entertaining. And above all the sincerity of Tredwell shines through.
This is why I give it five stars! Help other customers find the most helpful reviews
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