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Kirkby Christian Fellowship
Posted by: bruisednotbroken ()
Date: April 19, 2007 06:14PM

It's good to see the site back up again. Also, thank you for your encouraging comments regarding my going home for my sister's memorial service.

I don't remember sharing previously the circumstances which caused me to eventually leave KCF. As many of the KCF members are reported to be reading this site I thought I would enlighten them to what actually did happen.

On what was to be my last night at KCF (although at the beginning of the evening I had no plan to leave!) I arrived at the hall. Posted on the notice board was a piece of paper with many names on it (mine included). I was a knitted partner to Hazel who was already in leadership in the fellowship. Remember that knitted partners were to do all things together...hold no secrets from one another..."twinned" as it were. The list of names included all the "knitted" partners and we were summoned to a meeting the following week where new structures of leadership were to be set up. Prior to reading this list I had no knowledge that I was to be part of this new leadership structure! I was already becoming increasingly unsettled by the confining nature of the knitted partnerships and the hold the fellowship was exerting on my own personal life... This was the last straw for me...I was being coerced into falling into line and committing to a very confused, manipulative, dangerous and destructive fellowship. I couldn't even think for myself any longer.

As the service unfolded that night there was a prophecy given and although I cannot remember the exact wording the basics were "be obedient to what was being asked of you, don't waver in your involvement in KCF, don't rebel" etc. It was strongly worded and I was quite worked up about it! I did not believe it was a prophetic message from the Lord, but rather an attempt at manipulating us into co-operating.

By the end of the meeting I believe I did hear from God and his words to me were "Run." I never returned to the fellowship again. It has troubled me that I couldn't say good bye or attempt to explain my reasons for leaving the fellowship, particularly to my knitted partner...it is not the way I normally choose to leave a situation/relationship. But believe me when I say I was literally "running for my life."

My experiences at KCF and one other previous evangelical fellowship have to this day raised a big yellow caution light over anything "Christian". I hope and pray that any member of KCF or any other controlling, manipulative fellowship will listen to that still, small voice of reason and freedom (the voice of the Lord) and will find the strength and resolve to flee! You will recognize straight away that indeed, Christ has set you free!

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Kirkby Christian Fellowship
Posted by: rrmoderator ()
Date: April 19, 2007 07:49PM

To whom it may concern:

There was no "hacking."

The site was being loaded onto a new server and there were some technical problems along the way during this process.

All previous posts are up and remain intact.

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Kirkby Christian Fellowship
Posted by: yetigoosemonster ()
Date: April 19, 2007 08:33PM

Hi Rmmod,
I wasnt meaning the Rick Ross Site but Liverpool Writers web site about KCF.

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Kirkby Christian Fellowship
Posted by: dragonflyer ()
Date: April 20, 2007 12:41AM

Welcome little yellowspider ,well said you summed cheryl up pretty well,she is a control freak.

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Kirkby Christian Fellowship
Date: April 20, 2007 01:13AM

To Mods and all.
Forgive me, its seems i started this chain of events, re, the redirecting to kcf web site. They did this some time ago to Liverpool writers own website. When the site came on yesterday, what i thought was L,pool writers site, was in fact kcf's! I pressed the wrong link. Yes L'pool writer, i noticed your site doesn't flag up on a search. Not everything is done in error.

Bruised, I hope you are ok and thankyou for your last post.

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Kirkby Christian Fellowship
Date: April 20, 2007 01:35AM

Greetings Bruised! May I offer my condolencies...
I have had a period of many deaths I think I am at that age now. It did bring me down to the bottom of the barrel but I have emerged a different person from the one before. In fact I prefer the new me, it kinda put my life in perspective. I do believe from my experiences that every cloud has a silver lining now.
I know what you mean about Cheryls control tricks. It is classic old fashioned Primary School teacher behaviour to gain control over a class. Except she is doing it to vulnerable adults, who have allowed themselves to become like children by letting go of their own reason and judgement. It is interesting that 3 of them are teachers. Having been a Teacher myself and leaving the profession unfortunately teachers find it difficult to leave their controlling ways at school and so often take the control home with them...
But then it escalates to the old classic control trick she decides who she puts together in pairs. More often or not she would put you with someone who you clash with so she maintains control of the relationship as one tell tales on another. Its not so bad if you are strong mentally and emotionally. But as most people are vulnerable and broken and come to KCF as a last resort to resolve their problems the end up falling victim to Cheryls control. They become as even more vulnerable children when she gets them to sign pieces of paper foregoing their basic human rights. Rights to question and query ,Rights to voice opinions , rights to be friends with who they want to. This is definately not allowed. God did not give you a brain and an intellect to hand it over to a sociopathic bully....
But the members of KCF have ... I did for a period of time then I too heard the voice of God saying RUN AWAY....

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Kirkby Christian Fellowship
Posted by: rrmoderator ()
Date: April 20, 2007 02:06AM

Littleyellowspider:

It sounds like you don't understand coercive persuasion techniques in cults or cult-like groups.

See [www.culteducation.com]

There are some stark contrasts between the education and discipline of a teacher and "thought reform" or coercive persuasion.

See [www.culteducation.com]

Note the distinctions made through the above linked chart composed by a clinical psychologist.

I have seen Ph.D level professionals, lawyers, doctors and educated/free thinkers, mainpulated, by unethical leaders and groups without ever knowingly surrendering anything.

This is more about an often deceptive process of manipulation.

Blaming victims for the injuries, which were caused by a manipulative leader isn't a very reasonable or meaningful response to the situation.

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Kirkby Christian Fellowship
Date: April 20, 2007 07:44AM

MOD,
I think you misunderstand me...
I was a member of this Fellowship for many years and I know the individuals personally.I dont profess to be an expert on cults I simply speak from my experience and from what I see. Neither am I blaming the victims. I am one of those victims and I have lived through the whole experience of KCF. I am being honest and sharing my point of view from my experience. I dont think you can tell me what I should be thinking...

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Kirkby Christian Fellowship
Posted by: yetigoosemonster ()
Date: April 20, 2007 08:16AM

Hi Rmod,
I must say the 2 links you have given on coercive persuasion is written in in complicated psycho-babble . This is very difficult for my average brain to comprehend. It needs to be translated into normal language for lay men such as myself.
I can understand what yellowspider is saying having been a member too. I think dont think Cheryl has used physical violence yet? Correct me if Im wrong gang?

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Kirkby Christian Fellowship
Date: April 20, 2007 03:00PM

Re: Control & Manuipulation.

Yellowspider, I have to slightly disagree with what you say about 'Teacher/Pupil' type of control, and the types of fall under it, re vunarable/isolated.
I would neither class myself as either one of these, yet i was a 'willing' partner to abuse. Its seems incredible now, but the control is subtle at first, usually with some form of 'carrot' offered to the unsuspecting person. Its difficult to expound I will come back to this again, but you only have to see what's going on now in the fellowship. Most know about this website, have seen all whats been put on, are they running from his place? are they challenging their pastors? The truth is everyone there is for now willing to believe their side of the story. I would'nt class everyone in this place as 'vunarable' etc Thats the point with this type of control, it effects everyone, like the Mod stated,well educated, balanced, independant individuals, who don't realise they are being manipulated. We know what's happening because we have broke free of it, not because we recognised it, but the abuse had taken so much out of us, As Tina my wife said earlier, we could'nt cope no longer.
I hope this for now explains it
Love to all David

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