Well, thanks to the symbolism of UM theology, the mere sighting of a Daddy Longlegs can cause irrational worry in a follower over some perceived life complication or other, possibly necessitating a visit to the nearest practitioner asap.
Regarding men's massage, the UM clinic does offer it, but it doesn't appear to be as specific as the 'esoteric breast massage', so I think
Forum:
"Cults," Sects, and "New Religious Movements"