Don't be so sure the sexual abuse does not still exist. People who were raised in an abusive environment where their own boundaries were violated are much more likely to violate those boundaries with their own children, as happened to my daughter by a leader's son.

You seem to care more about defending the "us", the "we", without care of the "them" that were harmed. You seem to say if we didn't do it, see it, hear about it, then it is not relevant. When you see one rat there are often many more. I did not participate in owning slaves, but I can still appreciate the horror and would not support an existing group with that heritage. Don't kid yourselves, abuse still exists in these families wheather you see it or not.

@truthseeker2- I would be highly suspect of any activities that involve seeing Grandma for the weekend or extended visits. Divorce is never an easy circumstance, but I think you run the risk of being vilified by your ex-mother-in-law for lack of Godliness, or not allowing your child to reach her "true" potential. If not overtly, then subtly. The older generation is much worse with this kind of thing than the younger kids are, but there are plenty of "youth" that can be down right nasty if they want to be about people they feel aren't good enough. I think time with them would give the family a chance to work on her. Every event, the more people your daughter gets exposed to, that's more people that can say something that she might hold onto, like a cancer that has a chance to slowly spread to make her wonder why she doesn't see them as much, or if there is something WRONG with you.
I think discretion is really important for your daughter's sake. If you make it seem like they can NEVER see her, this may pique her interest and want to see them more. Just a thought. Good luck.

To whom it may conern:

If someone your children may come into contact with is in a "cult," in my opinion you should endeavor to avoid any and all contact. There is no point in allowing children to come under such an influence, unless you are required to through a court visitation agreement. And in that case you should probably do everything possible to have supervised visitation, i.e. the children are never alone with the cult involved individual.

Thanks for your reply. Unfortunately, my daughter's injury was what might be seen as passed down to the next generation. We were never involved with the religion. I divorced her father when she was 2. The family acted very odd in response to her allegations of abuse by her father. He voluntarily gave her up and my second husband adopted her. So, we have moved on, but she still has questions about that family as do I. I am also not sure if it is wise for her to have any further contact with her grandparents given the information on this site. I do wish I could get compensation for her. I do not know how all of this abuse has gone unanswered.

I don't see anyone from the Smestad clan on facebook

XSmes
Why not go public about this abuse and help others. There are likely more victims that would be validated. Perhaps there could be a class action suit against the present day cult.

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truthseeker2
You seem to care more about defending the "us", the "we", without care of the "them" that were harmed. You seem to say if we didn't do it, see it, hear about it, then it is not relevant. When you see one rat there are often many more. I did not participate in owning slaves, but I can still appreciate the horror and would not support an existing group with that heritage. Don't kid yourselves, abuse still exists in these families wheather you see it or not.

I'm just guessing here that you meant to respond to an older post/poster, but didn't quote it. I don't know who you were referring you, but I do want to answer it.

The "youth" who might be writing on here are in serious conflict. Some of these people are still involved, against their will. This means a piece of their mind has awoken to the fact that what they have been taught for ever, their whole life in fact, is wrong. That in itself is a big pill to swallow. But they are still tied by family, real blood family, best friends, spouse, etc to "the family." So these people, these kids really, are obviously not ready or in a position to just walk away, or they wouldn't talk about still being a part of it. So to allow a truth like, "people you know and have looked up to your whole life may be abusing your friends or their own children" is probably something they cannot psychologically handle.

I definitely hold the thought that this group is like an iceberg. Be afraid of what you see on the surface, but you better jump ship now, because that's only 10% of the actual mass of the thing.

In some ways I am very lucky. I don't have loads of my entire family involved in this thing. I am walking away with a group of friends who were a part of it from birth like myself, so we can commiserate and process the enormity of this thing together. I am walking away with an amazingly supportive set of friends that have never had ANYTHING to do with this group. And I'm walking away with a spouse who is breathing a very heavy sigh of relief that I didn't get sucked under forever, and didn't expose our child to this crazy cult theology.

Other people on this board, they are not so lucky. They'd have to give up on their ENTIRE extended families to leave, and make it a clean break. In my mind, if you can't make a clean break and cut all the ties, then you haven't really left.

Confused:
You do not seem confused at all. You seem to be very "in" . As you are doing nothing but justifying a current leader of a bizarre cult and attacking anyone who is hear to caution others. Shame! The Emporer has NO clothes.

Brainwashed:
You illustrate my point. Victims often victimize. One should not pity them or excuse their behavior due to their abuse. They need help and shoud be directed toward it.