We have been wondering how things wer going in Shilo.

My 'reprobate mind" remembers the past all too well. In the 1960 Fairfield had a college for "dumb rich kids." It closed but they sold it to a group...the Mahrishis."

Sine I am over taken with "bitteness" that a chunk of my children' inheritence from their great grand mother went in the funds to buid the conerence retraat way back in the 70's I hope that Shiloh is not sold to the muslims. Thinking like a buiness person there will be no return on people's investment in the kingdom of god.

Aren't there people living there in apartments? I apologized for being sanrky because I still care about the people who are still there believing.

Yes, I remember he did. I worked at the public libary as a student so i went and checked it out.

JRS read a lot. I think that many things he read were presented as revalations.

I don't know that age of most on this forum so some may not know this little tid bit of his history.

BAck in the early 60's I remember him teeing how he was bullied. The old timers at Christian Tabernale also mentioned it in a loving way. I don;t mean it as a critism. But he focused on the word not on the thing his peeers foused on. so yes, he had to have been kind of a McFly.

We have have know the skinny guy who got picked on in school . later he built us his muscles to become Mr Atlas.

I think JRS spent time doing a lot of self improvement in his presentations to become charasmatic. Taht is quite populat to do today to know how to market yourself.
Beside His father was a very living kind man that our home community loved. JTS grew up to influence sheep. I am not condoning nor condeming.

I know this thread is 2 1/2 years old. ( I just got approved to join the group) Yikes this is disturbing! but, if true, ( and I think it is) this is a real eye opener as to who was wearing the pants since mid late 60's.

paleface, I have read many of your other comments about the whole Nazi thing. We are on the same page re destructive pattern of behavior I think as I have been researching on "mind control". It behooves me to understand how so many Germans in the 1930's saw a problem but did nothing. This history repeats its self over and over all over the world.

We did do something by Having walked away from the Walk some time ago, it becomes more clear that we "good people" to some degree may have been the norm of codependants who did " nothing" like the Germans. it is hard to get the Walk out of my system as far as we were taught something life changing that was good up to a point. have we identified, yet, where the line was crossed relative to similar issues in the in stream religion games?

No matter the time in history or in the future whether is is spiritual or basic human survival prioities change can be very good and neccessary. However, what I am reading about m' radical culture changes of waht I see as "Amazon women" seems NUTZ!

There is some spiritual about power and control by a few people.

We walked away... in good time... but how many others are still there being compliant to possibly psychopathic behavior. Why?

I am open to my opinion changing. I am trying to figure things out in order to heal.

Jon, does Grandma Bowzer or the name Shirley ring a bell? If so they baby sat me before I grew up in the walk. If so I baby sat you and your siblings one day way back when.
I'd love to talk to you.

NancyB Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Hey larry bobo you said "Funny, I don't remember
> John teaching that the kingdom is a dictatorship,
> but rather a relationship. It was the lordship of
> Jesus Christ"
> Glad you said that you don't remember jrs saying
> somethings. At the time there were many things
> people said that I did not hear at all, either. I
> was devoute! I listened to tapes.I was on the
> front row.
>
> I've been reading thread wanting to jump in. I
> just got approved to join.
>
> In my opinion, I think different leaders and
> different churches made a lot of their own
> interpretations. Many sheep came into the Walk
> with their own set of ideas that carried over too.
> I don;t now, maybe his wrds could be open to
> interperation and Holy sprit was taking a nap or
> slying dragons instead of imparting truth?
>
> I would take notes and walk out of a meeting at
> t Shiloh. A friend might ask me what they missed
> while doing thier chores. The od thing was my
> friend said no one she asked seemed to take away
> the same point from the message.
>
> Anyone else experince that?
>
> However, I have learned that dealing with a
> a narsasits the story can change to be what we
> want to hear.
>
> "God is not the author of confusion" so why are we
> all confused on what jrs said?.

NancyB. I like your posts. Glad you jumped in. Shared some of your memories. Yes. We each seem to have our own memories. Of those days. And what was said. What was meant. Some have healed. Some still lead lives of quiet desperation.

thanks paleface for the book suggestion.

( Pleasae let me know if I am out of line.)

After I left the walk I craved fellowship. So I joined churches of any denomination that was conveint and people seemed enough to be safe.. I went to church bueiness meetings and what they had to offer for fun. To avoid my verbose tendenies my point is I was shocked at how many church leaders had not read the Bible. They did not know the basics like even naming a real book in the Bible.

My mentors in Christian Tabernacle in the old days made sure we kids hid the "word of god in our hearts." We memorized a lot. I have to question now, just how many sheep had read the Bible for themselves?

I had to question that fact at the time of personal chatter. if x__ zealots were grouened in the word or just going along with the movement with herd mentality( I worry I have a critcal spirit I feel live a Pavlovian dog salivating.)

I don;t know about you, but at different CLW locations newbies were spouting off stuff alegdiing JRS to have said and things were not scriptual at all. Did he really says some stuff or not? Who will ever know for sure even if we have old tapes? I think this coudl be were some twisting was enhanced????

EVen as a kid I listened to JOHN when he came to Washington. I learned so much ABOUT THE WORD OF gOD. He read from the Bible. ( I know things changed at several points on the time line.)
I think I was 9 when John preached about the children of Isreal wandering around 40 years in the wilderness becasue of whining and complaining about ungratefully wanting the things they had in Egypt. So Jess and Olive Rada had the children ministry were telling us about the Exodus and they went right into the promised land God rewarded them...Of course I raised my hand to smartly says " John robert says they were naughty and it took 40 years wandering aorund followwing the big cloud.) Olive was not happy with me at all. I wasa convenced she was wrong to skip 40 years of history. I was a kid I trusted my teachers, but she was wrong and I ruined her twisted point.

I forgive her for the mistake I caught her on. However, in the Walk I really have to question how much did those who stepped into leadership were not ever grounded in Biblcal principles? How can they minister or prophically know the voice of god speaking to them if they don;t read the bible?

I do know many leaders were reading the Bible so much the books wore out ( I think I wore out 3 or 4 bibles and Bowman was way ahead of me ) But sometimes there were self appointed leaders who I supposed were really goats. yes, JRS was the door opener the leader-what a resposoncibility! But, really, did we sheep not have a responcibility to make our own good choices based on the scripture ? did "we" ever say, " Hey, can you lead me to the scriptures taht back that up? I'm having trouble fitting thos epeicces together?" ( Or is that why some good pators and members got kicked out?)

As a whole, were "we" or were we not questioning non scripturally based or twisted scriptures? When some one did and got kicked out, why did folks not walk away with them?

"We can't change any one else's behvaior. We can only change our own." For myself, I think in order to come to some resolution and show love and support to loved one who remained in the walk at what ever level of understanding, is for me to figure out what I need to fix in my own thinking. My opinion becasuseI was in only one CLW location at a time.

Anyone have informaiton on Kingdom School in the '80's particulary in Fulerton?

My 2 oldeset were there. My son got beatings and learning to swear.

My kids ended up in foster care. My daughter a few months then was returned home. My son, David, for 7 years. Of course he lost track of dear friends. he thins of sme of them often.

Any one interested in exploring the subject of outright abuse at that time in the school. How did it affect the future for those children with what happened to select kids who some leaders thought they could beat into submission?

Great to touch base. Hopw you are doing well.

I know this is an old post but I am reaching out to you any in hope I can help by maybe giving you some missing puzlles pieces.

I grew up in what I call "the mother church" before the Walk. JRS started his ministry in his fathers church where I grew up. I left years ago after the "damage" to my children born from '72 to '83. My late father in law was a kingdom leader until his death. Talk about award faily relationships.

i just found this site, gratefully. My son and I have had many many discussions about things most famillies don't need to ever talk about, I would think. It has really been hitting me how much harm my children and their peers may have suffered because of the walk and kingdom school.

Now, because there were so many leaders in so many locations with so many of their own agendas all listening to the same directive words there will be consideable differences. Also how the children of us baby boomers in the walk will have been affected by how mentally healthy we parents were befor or when we got involved in the Walk.

My son, now 44, had run into a number of people who had also attended a kingdom school at the time we went. They said that it was an amazing experience. Turned out his step grand mother had been one of their teachers adn they liked. ( you know taht many of the teachers did not have a college education?)

Well, my son was beaten and he learned to swear from more than one teacher. I had taught him to read and how to multiple and dive and he wsa in Kindergartn. so I dont think he learned a thing. His scores certainly rasie the avearge test score for his school wheile he attended.

I think one major problem you "kingdom kids" now as adults faced was that your parents were never emotionally available.. too much warefare to loose the apostle or kill the nephulim. That was not healthy for them. Certainly for children in their formative years who need nurturing ang guidance...killing peoples' spouses with violent words is simply not OK, let alone normal part of chidl growth adn development.

From all of the of people I new in the Walk, for the most part they were honeset, loving, kind wonderful people who just wanted to serve god.

But something went wrong in the expectation of the leadership or interpretration and people maybe fell into a delussion by giving unconditional trust to some one they seemed to idolize ( Like a rock star).

Any real spirtuaity went out the door, but, people stayed because they wanted to find truth in some "higher power".it was hard to spearte from a fmaily support sysytem. Where wer people supposed to go to make awilling with "slave labor" week long intersessor" as job skills?

( I guess the wolrd was suppoed to end and we were suppoed to live n heaven on Earth. OOPS!

All men want to search for and find meaning. Something went terribly wrong and then it only got worse. This was not the worst "cult" to be in is no consolation for missing on on important parts of our child growth and development.

I don't have all the answers. But I do have a shoulder to bounce things off of for you as you look for some resolution.

WOW! I can "witness" to that word Bro! thank you You nail some excellent points


I am trying to breathe to get my words out.. the courage to blurt out. my responce to your words "it was totally about control and had nothing to do with helping me gain a better understanding of the truth. Perhaps if I had understood the truth I would have left sooner."

"Control" is the key word that I wish so many of us understood earlier in our lives. I have had a hard time putting the subission thing into the pain of my younger life. I can now say the Walk was like being molested... for me, any way.
"My" preditors did not just touch my private parts but my soul, my spirit with the heious act of Power and Control.

This way we were used was like sexual assualt which is not about making love kind of sex. it is power and control. The prediotr blames the victim and the threaten, "Your are special. No body will ever love you like it do. Don't tell any one our little secret. They would not understand. Dtell your mom. She will mad."

Storming the kingdom was not about spiritual matters or sex but power and control/ The basic statments once the 'sermons" deviated from the the Bible made me feel ashamed as I did with "my molestors". I was afraid some one would find out and I would be judged. I felt JRS "knew" how bad I was becasue I was molested. Do you remember how he could look right thru' you?

I could never say this. I wonder if any one else felt anything like I did. ( I know I have always had issues. I am not alone. I know... that made me very submission to adults in authority.)

I wonder if "we" as survivors want to take deep look at "our" secrets and vulnerablity that we allowed ourselves to be emotinally black mailed?

I would caution others to be very careful about exposing deep secrets like I just did on-line. (Exposing secrets in a cult group is a cult leader's tactic to capture people. Make them vulnerable. JRS did this. Holy roller churches do it. Not emotionally healthy. Get a licence therapist not a secret group.) I blog about this kind of stuff for years. But this is the first time where I have been able to link it to the walk part of my past. #metoo