Reepicheep Wrote: November 27, 2019 11:52PM
> Posted by: puddington ()
> Date: November 27, 2019 08:25AM
> Reep, I’m thinking about John on his deathbed. I
> imagine, in a moment of clarity, he looked around
> the room and saw only his groupies. People he had
> created by feeding them fairy tales. And other
> people that wanted his power. It must have dawned
> on him that these people didn’t REALLY love him.
> They just wanted something from him. Or they were
> there as bondservants to The Apostle. And then he
> remembered Martha. The one who loved John the man.
> Just the man, not the apostle.
> That sounds entirely plausible, puddington. I have
> also been told by someone who knows that Martha
> Stevens loved John for the rest of her life, in
> spite of everything. So my question is, if there
> is such a thing as a nephilim channel, which one
> was it? The one who loved her husband in spite of
> everything, or the one who became so infatuated
> with his own grandiosity that he needed
> worshippers attending him 24/7?
Reep and Pud,
your statements touched me to the core. JRS WAS capable of love and every bit an imperfect human as the rest of us. I think this is your insight is the heart of the conflict for many of us survivors.
I shudder to think that JRS died at a younger age than a number of of are today. He had a lovely family. He came from loving and kind Christian parents who served the community of Washington, Iowa.
That family history is over ridden by the fact that JRS was "seduced by the Dark side" of LA/ Hollywood lifestyle that was so different from his parents and the community I grew up in had been.
Personally, I am in conflict with the olden days memories of when I knew JRS, Martha and girls when they came to Washington for special services. tho' I now call those times "when the circus came to town" my home church did benefit from the special meetings and chatting with the Stevens.
From my perspective going to church with Stevens and his loving family was a very positive influence on Christian Tabernacle families - up to the turning point where Marilyn era began. ( There is no doubt that JRS and his cronies had sexual addiction issues to say the least that were very secret.)
The sh*t had to have hit him hard when he lay dying. It grieves me so that a man I had respected for teaching me Biblical principles ( up to a point) could suffer helplessly at the merciless hands of M & G.
In my mind I have compassion and empathy for JRS as he died even knowing that he royally screwed up and lead us into dark hole with dark and unscrupulous people who did not share his families "Christian values." What a lonely way to die knowing that he opened the doors for the woman and daughters who loved him had gotten screwed by his mistress. this is gut wrenching.
My perspective I know is so different from the bulk of survivors. This does not make me any better or worse- just different. I have a burden for my family and friends in Washington county. I can understand their perspective at this time. My heart goes out to them and I just want to hold them in my arms to say, "I understand your grief. I understand why you stayed in TLWF. Please let me help you separate out the good from the bad."
I think it is important at this time of auctions and bulldozing to be cognoscente of the fact that with Living Word Fellowship there were vary different groups of people. We form the old timers families in Washington knew and loved the Stevens family as our own. The dream for Shiloh was supported by the Washington people - we were family along with John, Martha, and his girls.
I'm babbling from my perspective that is distinctly in an unique niche separate from the crimes of the Hargraves. We Christian Tabernacle folks will grieve the loss of a dream build by a human man who died a sad lonely death because of his own mistakes. And we CT people have suffered the loss of our dream of a 'church camp with flush toilets'.
When we process our unresolved grief
of a former pastor and friend and new grief then we Christian Tabernacle core families will have to explore our part in enabling
the criminal element
Thanks Reep and Pud for speaking up about the love John and Martha had a husband wife. I believe this point fact will be very relevant to the healing of my core family from Washington.