Jeri442:
Thank you very much for the detailed post. That type of truth-telling is the first step to moving forward, in my opinion.
Most of these "LGATS" work in a very similar way.
I will throw out a few ideas for you, and you can consider if they have any value for you.
First, it seems you are "blaming yourself" for what happened after PSI far too much. We need to remember that the people running these types of groups are not used car salesmen. They are EXTREMELY sophisticated manipulators in the arts of "Influence".
It could be that you are just more "suggestible" as some people are more suggestible than others. This means that all of the techniques they run at PSI, could affect you much more powerfully that other people.
So there is no need to beat yourself up, those PSI folks are experts in manipulation and persuasion. They really know how to mess with your mind, and that appears to be what happened to you.
It happens to most of us, at one time or the other.
I got sucked into LGAT's hook-line-and-sinker when I was younger too. It took many years to figure it all out, and then move on. Some of us are just more "suggestible" and thus these types of Social Influence can really take us over.
But moving forward, I would encourage you to continue to educate yourself about LGAT's, as much as possible. That helps to figure things out. Read all you can about their methods and techniques.
Write about your experiences, and reflect. This also helps the healing process. Write about everything the PSI folks did to you, and how they did it. Write, write, and write some more, online, and in private.
Find a good Cognitive-Behaviorial Therapist, and work through some things.
But don't ever give up hope. You have paid a high price, but many have also. Many people have gone bankrupt from these LGAT's, as they work people into a frenzy of spending. (The Tony Robbins LGAT''s are notorious for people spending all the money they don't have on more courses, courses, courses). [
board.culteducation.com]
Many lose their homes.
Many get divorced.
Many don't get proper health care due to Quackery.
Sometimes it can take years to work it through.
BUT, once you have figured it out, and know what happened, and have recovered, then you will have LEARNED what happened to you, and how they did it. Then its far less likely anyone can ever do this to you again.
I have said for years that its the "regular folks and soccer moms" who are the most harmed by LGAT's, like the Tony Robbins one. Why? Because they might not have the psychological defences of a hard-nosed entrepreneur, perhaps. The LGAT's are able to take the most KIND, decent, and trusting people, and literally almost wreck their minds.
People who are already kind of nasty, are harder for them to mess with!
Its the "nice folks" who really get screwed.
So there are many stories of recovery, and once you are able to work everything through and understand, you really can come out as a stronger person on the other side. But it takes time.
These LGAT's at this point function like a type of Big Brother "mind control" system, and are very, very sophisticated. Don't blame yourself, it can happen to anyone.
But if we learn a bit more everyday about LGAT's and related issues, we can come out of a stronger and more adept person.
All the best.