former lanmdark person
I just went through the forum and the advanced course December 2009 and June 2010
For about a week and a half after the forum I was in a "funk" if you will not full blown depression but not myself
Looks like I am repeating the cycle again after the advanced course.
During Sunday of the advanced course I told my wife I would be willing to pay landmark the 230.00 each just to have them leave us alone.
The only good thing at this point is I told David Cunningham to his face NO this is after being badgered by him directly on Sunday to take the SELP.
Right now I am waiting for the phone calls to start
I watched him tell a woman that was molested at three that she had to take responsibility for it!!!!!
If you want to help shut this new age form of stealing and mental abuse please please file complaints with both your Attorney General office and the Federal Trade Commission
Hi 'former landmark person' - your experience matched mine after the Forum. I did it in mid-2005. For a whole year and a half after the Forum, I was in a "funk" - to put it mildly, not knowing what the hell was going on. I was confused about myself, what I'd heard in the Forum, some of the powerful stuff that was shared in there that really shook me to the core, mostly because it was stuff I'd done in my life, but never admitted to anyone, e.g. hid what I did very well - adultery. I was certain that what I was doing was "ok", from my perspective and was quite addicted to the 'hunt', sex, women, prostitutes, etc....
All that changed in the Forum. The problem is that the change happened long time after the Forum. I saw people 'popping' in the Forum. I don't think I popped. I went DOWN, completely, like you.
The first culprit for how I felt was, as you pointed out, Landmark Education. They indeed stopped calling me, I stopped taking courses, but for some reason I couldn't get reprieve from whatever was ailing me - and I wasn't sure what it was. I just felt depressed and the more depressed I felt, the more I tried to fix it with my past behaviors - more infidelities, more sex, more of whatever the cycle was, as you noticed.
Then eventually I took the AC, my head cleared up more, and then the SELP as well as the ILP, like nettie.
Ultimately, it came down to the fact that I was addicted to sex - wasn't willing to admit it - and I attempted to use Landmark Education's courses to "fix" myself or other people's view of sex to match mine. For some reason, everytime I'd engage in this kind of fixing - it backfired on me 10x.
Eventually, I stopped going to LE altogether and went and sought out a CSAT - these guys take sex addiction therapy seriously, and I was able to overcome all of the destructive behaviors that had me be out of integrity. I stopped jacking off to porn, seeking affairs, prostitutes, etc - and started to take pleasure in what I had in life - a beautiful and forgiving wife who went through the shit I put her through, a young daughter who was growing up quickly, and a career at which I stagnated for a while as I was in recovery - all of which changed once I addressed my _real_ problem - lust and sexual addiction.
Landmark Education was not able to help me deal with my "little sexual probleml" square on - in the sense that there was no room to discuss these things in their courses. The language that is allowed at Landmark is very limited, and even though it allows you to describe any and every issue from an ontological perspective, it does not help you SPECIFICALLY address issues the way individual or group therapy does. The Forum and their courses isn't therapy - and they make that clear to everyone who signs up.
To Landmark's credit - they did shake me up sufficiently to be able to look at myself in a very rigorous way where I would stop blaming OTHERS or my circumstances for how I was behaving (that cycle you're talking about), as well as stopped blaming MYSELF - which is even more detrimental to recovery from any addiction. Thus I stopped taking their courses and sought our professional help - covered by health insurance too, so it wasn't a big deal.
It is very easy to confuse Landmark's courses for therapy or some kind of a fix. This is _not_ what they are selling. And this is the problem I've seen with many other people who'd much rather take Landmark courses - than go to work on what's really going on, thinking the next course will "fix" them... which was my view for a while, yet I kept slipping into my pattern.
To be specific about what _REALLY_ happened at Landmark - I actually brought up my issue with sex addiction _once_ in a small group while I was attempting to lead an introduction. An elderly woman that was part of the introduction I was leading actually got offended, reacted to what I brought up as a topic/possibility that I was creating in the introduction for myself and I got completely turned off by her response, took it personally and lost all hope in the ILP.
In a way, that's good - because I am exactly where I need to be right now - dealing with a very very personal/intimate problem I have had linger for a while that has me be out of integrity.....
In my opinion - it's futile to point the finger at other people for how we feel about something that may have happened years ago, just like that woman who remembered being molested at age 3... Even in therapy - professionals with degrees, psychiatrists, psychologists, etc - she would have to confront the trauma of what she went through - and the therapist would be ripping her off or setting her up for failure if he or she did not have her 1) re-experience/release the trauma in some way, and 2) create a new interpretation around the event that took place, regardless of how traumatic it was.
In LE terms - they call this 'geting off it' - except the problem is, the deeper the trauma, the harder it is to get off. Some people DO NOT want to get off. It's not _SAFE_ to get off it. If they did, they'd fall apart. This is the sensitivity training therapists have that LE leaders do not necessarily - so they'd just ask you to 'get responsible', as though this happens in a moment, or overnight - it DOESNT, and the more you push and the harder you push for people to get responsible inside of 3 days straight, the more resistance you get, and the more of the "fixit" mentality prevails in them....
Can you hold Landmark responsible for making you feel a certain way? It's a fine line you'd be walking there.... legally or otherwise. Can EVERYONE who walks into LE's courses be aware at once as to what's going on in their own heads, and get present to what the core issue/belief is? Hardly....
But I definitely think that making them wrong for the service they provide is not beneficial. There are people, after all, who do not deal with addictions as I did - and see their courses useful in other ways, even inside the 3 days that they administer them.... and get something out of it immediately without seeing them as a 'fix' or some form of therapy.
It is incumbent upon the participant to decide after doing the Forum whether it is the proper avenue for whatever ails them - an addictive pattern of some sort - or whether to seek professional help from people who can dwell on the details, and who DO have the required sensitivity training to pull someone through from trauma to personal freedom from anxiety, depression.... Sometimes medication is required too.. and Landmark can't prescribe that either :).
To summarily dismiss the Forum as "evil" is not beneficial. Having been on both sides of this issue - I completely empathize with you as well as with what LE has to offer people...
I hope you get the real help you need elsewhere if LE wasn't able to help you.