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Re: Kirkby Christian Fellowship
Posted by: Mork ()
Date: May 10, 2021 08:59PM

I found another resource that seems pretty good; you can find it here.

A few highlights that I thought were relevant from my experience.


Characteristics Associated with Cultic Groups -

The group displays excessively zealous and unquestioning commitment to its leader and (whether he is alive or dead) regards his belief system, ideology, and practices as the Truth, as law.
Questioning, doubt, and dissent are discouraged or even punished.
Mind-altering practices (such as meditation, chanting, speaking in tongues, denunciation sessions, and debilitating work routines) are used in excess and serve to suppress doubts about the group and its leader(s).
The leadership dictates, sometimes in great detail, how members should think, act, and feel (for example, members must get permission to date, change jobs, marry—or leaders prescribe what types of clothes to wear, where to live, whether or not to have children, how to discipline children, and so forth).
The group is elitist, claiming a special, exalted status for itself, its leader(s), and its members (for example, the leader is considered the Messiah, a special being, an avatar—or the group and/or the leader is on a special mission to save humanity).
The group has a polarized us-versus-them mentality, which may cause conflict with the wider society.
The leader is not accountable to any authorities.
The group teaches or implies that its supposedly exalted ends justify whatever means it deems necessary. This may result in members’ participating in behaviors or activities they would have considered reprehensible or unethical before they joined the group (for example, lying to family or friends, or collecting money for bogus charities).
The leadership induces feelings of shame and/or guilt in order to influence and/or control members. Often, this is done through peer pressure and subtle forms of persuasion.
Subservience to the leader or group requires members to cut ties with family and friends, and to radically alter the personal goals and activities they had before they joined the group.
The group is preoccupied with bringing in new members.
The group is preoccupied with making money.
Members are expected to devote inordinate amounts of time to the group and group-related activities.
Members are encouraged or required to live and/or socialize only with other group members.
The most loyal members (the “true believers”) feel there can be no life outside the context of the group. They believe there is no other way to be and often fear reprisals to themselves or others if they leave (or even consider leaving) the group.
Michael D. Langone

I was also interested to read this


How can we recognize a healthy church? In addition to matters of appropriate doctrine, a healthy church is reconciling and restorative, not adversarial and elitist. Members of healthy churches seek to deepen and strengthen their family commitments. Legitimate leaders will welcome dissent and hard questions from members without threat of reprisal. Trustworthy leaders will encourage accountability, and they will establish checks and balances.

Ronald M. Enroth, Ph.D

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Re: Kirkby Christian Fellowship
Posted by: I can see ()
Date: May 11, 2021 09:35PM

Informative post mork. I did some research myself. There is a lot of information and help out there if you want it. Unfortunately you cant really see kcf for what it is when you're in it but deep down you know it's not quite right.

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Re: Kirkby Christian Fellowship
Posted by: Mork ()
Date: May 25, 2021 04:26PM

Thank you. I watched one of Bill Turners videos, it was really interesting. He talks about putting things to the fiery test, (Based on 1 Thesselonians 5.21 “Prove all things and hold fast to that which is good.”) He goes on to say “If it comes to pass, then you will know whether it’s right or not.” - Wise words.

A bit more "what to look for" -


A safe group/leader will answer your questions without becoming judgmental and punitive.
A safe group/leader will disclose information such as finances and often offer an independently audited financial statement regarding budget and expenses. Safe groups and leaders will tell you more than you want to know.
A safe group/leader is often democratic, sharing decision making and encouraging accountability and oversight.
A safe group/leader may have disgruntled former followers, but will not vilify, excommunicate and forbid others from associating with them.
A safe group/leader will not have a paper trail of overwhelmingly negative records, books, articles and statements about them.
A safe group/leader will encourage family communication, community interaction and existing friendships and not feel threatened.
A safe group/leader will recognize reasonable boundaries and limitations when dealing with others.
A safe group/leader will encourage critical thinking, individual autonomy and feelings of self-esteem.
A safe group/leader will admit failings and mistakes and accept constructive criticism and advice.
A safe group/leader will not be the only source of knowledge and learning excluding everyone else, but value dialogue and the free exchange of ideas.

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Re: Kirkby Christian Fellowship
Date: July 02, 2021 02:21AM


I found this video really helpful about trauma bonding and cults and how we carry it throughout life, unless we do the work. I am now doing the work as suggested by Richard Grannon, and it is working. There is a free course on his website that gives you the tools to heal. I know I have complex PTSD enhanced by my time at KCF. I am 60 but why should I continue to suffer until I die.

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Re: Kirkby Christian Fellowship
Date: July 08, 2021 10:08PM

This is a song that sums up the devastating experience at KCF


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