Thank you Nichijew and DrJesusEsq.

The day I got my Gohonzon was actually one of the happiest in my life.
I felt as if everything in my life was going to get better from that day forward.
I was always up early to do Gongyo, just like you DrJesus.
At the time, I was going through so much emotional distress that I chanted with the goal of simply making it through my day.
I spent many teary eyed sessions just crying in front of my Gohonzon.

And in truth, my life actually has gotten better in so many ways since that day.
I think that I started to believe in myself that day. I think I did find the positive side of what having faith can do to improve your life.
The practice of chanting helped me to control my emotions and give me hope.

Nichijew: There is such a beautiful nugget of gold in the Lotus Sutra.
I think that's what I was supposed to find from my experience with the SGI. I am grateful for that. Thanks for the reminder.

I will be moving on from the SGI shortly, with no regret.
Again, just thankful to have found this forum. I am one of those people who always jumps in with a full heart to contribute.
If I hadn't realized what I was jumping into, I'm sure it would have been much more heartbreaking and traumatic down the road for me.

I still have to remove myself from my toban duties...Lol!!!

Yes, I see back in the day – good old Ikeda’s title was just president – and nothing more, more or less – over the years especially after the breakup in 1991 things started turn towards Ikeda and away from Nichiren – more now is focused on Ikeda guidance – and less on Gosho – now on to ESD yes it’s a conditioning center – full of Ikeda statements – slogans – and songs – years back when my kids went to a gosho camp – upon their return I asked so what did you cover @ camp – they were very disappointed and replied all we talked about was Ikeda it was awful – because we didn’t go there - we kept asking about the Gosho study that really never happened. Needless to say red flags all around. I am sure ESD is fully engaged in Ikedanization of a new generation.

With all the talk on here about Rock The Era I got really curious and checked out some official SGI websites. Holy cow. One of them has a running countdown to the meeting. As I write this, RTE is only 5 days, 12 hours, 5 minutes and 23 seconds away - hooray! Conveniently placed next to the clock is a link to the RTE Online Payment Site where you can download a credit card payment form.

They've also set up a RTE Facebook page with links to Youtube videos. The most disturbing one starts out with a shot of the cosmos and the faces of the 3 presidents fade onto it - not unlike gods looking down upon us. Another one has the lyrics of the RTE song "Rise" (which contains the line "We pray, like Sensei we pray") over video footage of people preparing for the big event. That one was personally unnerving because I saw people doing what I used to do in preparation for all the big 80's conventions: playing in the band, performing gymnastics, etc. As a fortune baby I only knew of a life within the SGI, so all of that cheering, singing and running around for Sensei was completely normal to me. Now, looking at that stuff in my late 30's, it's downright creepy to watch. "This is our time!," "Decisive Victory!" - ugh, no thanks.

Dear OTP

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overthetop

I still have to remove myself from my toban duties...Lol!!!

I'm sure you will miss cleaning the toilets, the very heart of SGI training [as if the training within the life of a Votary of the Lotus Sutra weren't enough].

Mark

@WFC Nichiren never declared himself the Buddha. He had reason to believe he might be the reincarnation of Bodhisattva Jogyo. Even SGI study material mentions that.

@DavidM You wrote, "I'm in two minds on what to think of it. On one hand, it could be a mistake by SGI, they applied too much pressure on people to give up their time, money and personal life in the name of 'Rock The Era'. This has tipped people over the edge who have had issues with SGI for a while and has been a big shock to people relatively new to SGI."
I think it was their mistake. They overreached with the size of the venues and the expectation that YD would introduce tons more YD. I cannot believe that SGI would deliberately host an event that is bound to look empty simply to drive out more well-informed members. Remember, they know that these attendees will want a dynamic event, FULL of other YD. Young people don't like to feel they are doing something so uncool that no one wants to come. That's where the organization misfired. Many of the young people who have given the last months to SGI will resent being made to feel that they should have done more to bring out more people. Some of those people will wind up here and then, kapow!

One thing that I really found disturbing and strange is how much pressure the WD and MD have been putting on new youth to go to Rock the Era.
I feel like they were really just hammering away at some of these people until they finally gave in and said Yes. Probably just so people would
leave them alone. Geez, what's the point of forcing all of these young people into doing something they can't afford?
I think this kind of mentality and behavior is just so wrong...yet another reason I have been turned off by the SGI.

@overthetop, @doubtful

The formula has always worked before, why won't it work now? Just stoke up the fires of "prove to sensei you are worth his trouble" and the WD will come out of the woodwork wagging their fingers at the slacker american members who won't participate or pay their zaimu!

Sadly, the numbers of those WD are shrinking along with the rest of the membership who are looking for something real and meaningful and instead get Ikea action figures and Gosho coloring books. Talk about dumbing things down.

I remember the good old days when you sacrificed time, fortune and energy based upon (what seemed to be) consistent philosophical basis. Now it is just "you better do it because the master says so!".

For the umpteenth time, sure am glad I'm out of it.

Wakatta1

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wakatta1
@overthetop, @doubtful

The formula has always worked before, why won't it work now? Just stoke up the fires of "prove to sensei you are worth his trouble" and the WD will come out of the woodwork wagging their fingers at the slacker american members who won't participate or pay their zaimu!

Sadly, the numbers of those WD are shrinking along with the rest of the membership who are looking for something real and meaningful and instead get Ikea action figures and Gosho coloring books. Talk about dumbing things down.

I remember the good old days when you sacrificed time, fortune and energy based upon (what seemed to be) consistent philosophical basis. Now it is just "you better do it because the master says so!".

For the umpteenth time, sure am glad I'm out of it.

Wakatta1

@wakatta1
Interesting... In 17 years of practice I don't remember any instances where all of that activity was based on any sound, consistent philosophical basis. What held me was the thought that if I stuck it out just a little longer, I'd "get" something important that I was missing. I spent 16 years doubting my feeling that something was very wrong in NSA/SGI, and just kept pushing.

It's good that we have different experiences. I'm enjoying reading how other people interacted with the organization. Unlike most I read about on this thread, I somehow remained an outsider.

But like you, I'm very glad to be out of it.

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wakatta1
I remember the good old days when you sacrificed time, fortune and energy based upon (what seemed to be) consistent philosophical basis

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dragon14
I spent 16 years doubting my feeling that something was very wrong in NSA/SGI, and just kept pushing.

Funny enough though I can relate to both of you. Compared to what I witnessed before I left (80's and 90's) there seemd to be more serious study. At the same time I must admit that I also felt something was wrong. The notion that I might be part of a cult was there quite early on after I joined. Study, "Cultural activities" and the way other faiths were mentined was allways over the top.