Re: Landmark in Australia - beginning of the end of my partner and I
Date: July 10, 2008 11:11AM
I was in your mans shoes just over a year ago. I was on the emotional high of just completing the Advanced Course myself. Things were going good I thought, that is until the fog started to lift and the dark underbelly of what had been done to me started to surface. I give much credit to my then girl friend for bringing me to my senses, all be it roughly and not a pretty sight.
She kept prodding me to think and kept pointing out how my reasoning didn't make sense. She kept telling me that I didn't need them (Landmark) to be successful etc. Soon afterwards, about the time I got into the SELP, things started going down hill in my life and I started questioning things. I started putting two and two together and realized that my slide started after joining Landmark and taking the Forum and the pace of the slide really picked up after I took the Advanced Course.
In the end I lost everything! My relationship with the woman I loved and I wanted to marry, my financial stability, my sanity, my health, and eventually my job! It was agonizing slide that didn't stop until this February when I lost my job, even though I had left Landmark in June of 2007! In fact I'm still dealing with it from time to time. The woman that was my girl friend is still in my life but not the extent that she was before.
All I can say is that since he did go off on them in the Advanced Course there is hope. But also bear in mind that you are dealing with a very strong man with a previously well defined identity. When it hits him that he has been "taken for a fool" by a cult, he is probably going to be devistated, and probably very hard to handle. If he ends up hitting rock bottom like I have it is not going to be a pretty sight. Be prepared for the worst, and that is the honest truth and it could very possibly set him back for months even years, as it has me.
When he finally comes to his senses all I can say is be there for him. Don't baby him, just be supportive. Don't be judgemental towards him after he leaves Landmark. He will probably make a lot of stupid decisions. It's okay to point out what he is doing wrong, just don't come down on him harshly.
You can start out making him think by pointing out all the successful people in his life that are not in Landmark as well as the successful people he doesn't know personally. Be sure to point out people he can relate to. Success comes in many forms, not necesarily the monetary kind.
Another think to be aware of is that Landmark is going to desire for him to come into their fold and become a leader of somesort and start spreading their dogma. They will want him because he is charismatic, successful, and can get the job done. Plus his position as a Lawyer gives him an air of authority that is useful for them. Landmark wants and needs people like him to keep their organization afloat, and he will recieve a lot of subtle pressure from them to join their ranks.
I'm telling you this because this is exactly what happened to me. But in the end I was too much for them to handle and now I'm one of their biggest detractors, on this forum at least. I'm not afraid to spill my guts about what I know personally about Landmark. I'm no where near Nettie's level of effectiveness but my disdain for the organization is definately something to be reconned with. I'm sure they would love a piece of me because of what I have written on this forum.