I was hoping someone might be able to please help explain this Landmark Forum concept.

My partner deemed that he was complete with me- no regrets, no unfinished business.

He called off our 18 mon relationship and 30 year friendship after attending the Landmark Forum with a phone call.

He won't answer my phone calls, respond to emails or text messages. He did take down my photos from his prolific social media at my request. He did leave his favourite photos of me though which is highly confusing.

To say I am heartbroken, confused and complete shocked would be an understatement.

Could someone please explain what on earth just happened as I have no idea. Will he ever snap out of this delusion? Previously he was damaged from a passed relationship and healing that now seems his focus whilst literally disposing of me is of no consequence to him - so it seems.

Any insight or advice would be greatky appreciated. Thank you. I just need to understand as it makes no sense to me. It is cold and callous behaviour from someone I loved.

Throughmyeyes,

I am so sorry that he did this to you.

Generally, when someone in L.E. says that they are "complete" with something or someone, they are saying that they are done with it, or, as you wrote, "no unfinished business."

Cold and callous is par for the course in Landmark, though they put on such a show of supposedly caring.
Two other adjectives that I would add are "calculating" and "manipulative."

I can't tell you what his thinking was, or if he will snap out of it. Sometimes, people will see enough that turns them off that they will leave. I did.

I know that you are hurting, and that you want him back, but if he does suddenly contact you to (seemingly) apologize, after a period of time, please be cautious. He could contact you to say that he was "inauthentic" about something. This call may then be followed a few days later with a sales pitch, trying to get you to go to an introduction. IMHO, there is nothing as inauthentic as the calls that Landmarketers make about their "inauthenticity," (often as part of an assignment).

Once again, I'm sorry.

Hello kdag

Thank you so very much for your response. I have been doing as much reading as I can to try to undestand how this happened. It is so hard to fathom losing someone this way.

I would agree with your calculating and manipulative statements but because they aee so out of character I've been so confused. LE has essentially altered his persona but asbyou say he is foming access all sensitive and caring to everyone else but with me he has literally flicked a switch.

I don't think I will hear from him again as he was quite adament in the ensuing email that he had made himself quite clear on the matter and that there was nothing left to say. I was speechless. A friend of mine quickly looked at his fb page and walk my photos etd are still there so it makes no sense to me at all. However I suppose in his head if we are complete then these wouldn't really effect him would they? It is so confusing.

He had started misconstruing everything I said. A classic example was before he was to fly out for another SELP session I told him o was worried about his physical and mental health to which he responded - are you saying I'm fat??? His mind would go in a completely different direction to mine. It was after his course - three days after this conversation he called it off without warning.

I am scared for him. He has two more, two entire day sessions in Sept and Nov in which is he already sleep deprived before he gets there so the end will be interesting.

Thank you for your forwarning re the phone call. If it ever occurred I will be very cautious.

Again thank you for helping me I really appreciate it. I am very stumped with this one xx

An alert to readers of this discussion.

If any trolls show up, this is a sign that someone does not want this
discussion to be easily followed,

This is not paranoia. We have seen this pattern for many years on CEI's message board whenever a discussion becomes especially powerful.

Warning for Throughmyeyes:

Your former ex and his handlers may be reading this right now.

This may be a trap for you.

Right now you crave an explanation for why this person has dumped you with no
explanation.

You are feeling abandoned and CRAVING an explanation.

This may be a set up, a trap. Corboy is just fantasizing here.

He may return.

He may call you.

If he calls you or shows up at your place, you
are a human being.

Your entire nervous system will light up like fireworks.

Unless you are dead or stoned, you can't help but feel this way.

You will feel so stunned, relieved, GRATEFUL
that it will be (maybe) better than the best lovemaking you've
ever had.

Repeat: This may be a trap.

Your X may return and exploit this --- to get you to do Landmark.

Here is Corboy's speculation, a hunch, a First Amendment protected fantasy

Perhaps he was coached to do this.

Dumping you like this is grounds to cut him off. He is currently
radioactive. Being in his presence, listening to his voice will trigger your
nervous system and make you vulnerable and influenceable.

If he pleads with you to let him come back so he can make it up to you,
tell him to treat his next girlfriends better than that and
not run any LGAT jargon on them.

Now, a troll may come visiting and say that you are an adult woman
you are free to make your own choices.

The troll will say I and the rest of us on Cult Education are infantalizing you, being controlling and nannying you.

First, making choices is meaningless unless we have full knowledge of what
we are choosing. This is called Informed Choice.

You can freely choose between aspirin, Tylenol and Ibuprofen because
each bottle has a paper giving a full list of side effects. You can
talk to your doctor or pharmacist.

LEC doesn't give us this.

LEC got a place on this website and has been criticized by many because LEC
gave them bad side effects.

No. LEC is the control freak factory, not us.

Some LGAT recruiters will pay for you to attend a transformation weekend.

Or say they've paid.

It is a powerful way to leverage a skeptical or reluctant friend to feel a sense of obligation and attend.



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 09/17/2017 09:15AM by corboy.

It is alarming to see how they are perceived to be deep thinkers, kind and caring to everyone else, yet are cold and callous to those who love them and genuinely have their best interests at heart.

I know when he was made to do his three and five year goal plans, they predominately featured around his work, kids and himself. I was not included. I only found this out after bit I noticed the change in him when he said that was his next assignment. It was after this assignment the dynamic and everything between us changed. He stopped talking to me about anything to do with the course and became quite closed and secretive.

His current actions contradict the person who he was, so internally he must be in such turmoil I would say.

I think on reflection after a huge fight we had in July in which he acted completely disproportionatly and irrationally to a statement I said, he kicked me out of the house and didn't talk to me for two days. He then called and wanted to pretend it never happened and move on. He never apologised though. Between this and us breaking up in August he started to critisise me and would become irritated by me for simple mundane things.

I think he must have been broken down during this session and not given any coping/re building mechanisms for the way up.

As both Corboy and Kdag have mentioned his critical thinking ability seems to be null and void.

Again that's for your contribution as it is helping me.

Suddenly disappearing on someone with zero or a jargony explanation is called
'ghosting'.

IMO this is massive abuse, psychological assault, taking the form of abandoning you.

If he did this after a 30 year relationship, this demonstrates how powerful
the LGAT process is.

If something like this was put into a pill, the FDA would make it Schedule One, if it even became legal.

Vanishing with no explanation is abusive as hell.

Explanation and information is exactly what a human person needs so they can regain agency by making sense of why they've been rejected.

When someone ghosts you, every cell inside of you is screaming for an explanation, on top of feeling abandoned.

When your friend dumped you with only an incomprehensible explanation,
he denied you contextual information you need to heal yourself.

You are NOT needy to feel this way.

You are NOT 'running a racket' (Landmark jargon)

You are a human being with a heart and mind.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 09/17/2017 09:19AM by corboy.

Oh my gosh, thanks Corboy that is exactly what he has done hasn't he? I didn't even think of it from that perspective but you are right. He completed me and then ghosted me! Yes we had been friends since we were 12 years old and I have found the disrespect and complete disregard for the longevity of our friendship let alone our 18 month renationship, really difficult to comprehend.

Gee these LGATs are so powerful and so very dangerous.

Thank you for making me see that no, I am not the needy crazy one.....nor was I doing and saying the things he was accusing me of.

Is there anything anyone can do to help him? I know he told friends of his that I can be mean but that was him taking my sentences completely out of context. If I was mean we wouldn't have been friends for 30 years...

He has to travel this journey alone doesn't he?

It is so sad.

I made a mistake.

Quote

If he did this after a 30 year relationship, this demonstrates how powerful
the LGAT process is.

If something like this was put into a pill, the FDA would make it Schedule One.

I would write "the FDA would probably make it Schedule One" --- unless the rules of the game have changed!

Schedule I drugs are illegal.

[www.google.com]

Cults Inside Out gives a detailed description of exactly how LGATs recruit, the methods used to indoctrinate and change people into relationship vandals.

[www.amazon.com]

You two have been friends since age 12. You go all the way back to
the last year of grade school.

As part of the Landmark process they regress subjects to childhood
by using songs like Old Macdonald Had a Farm"

(More here)

Quote

Quote

https://www.culteducation.com/group/1020-landmark-education/12510-when-it-comes-to-landmark-education-corporation-theres-no-meeting-of-the-minds.html

Dating/relationship possible with a LEC fan?
Posted by: hotshot (218.101.71.13)
Date: December 23, 2003 03:01AM

Yeah, one of the worst things I saw there,
was when they do the part where you have to write down one of the worst things that has ever happened to you, on paper, and then they put you in pairs, and you are meant to read out your PROBLEM until you feel no emotional ties to the past, and I was put with a lady that was sexually abused by her dad, and then they started playing OLD MACDONALD HAD A FARM, over the speakers, and I looked at this poor girl, and she was so upset, and it was just BIZARRE!!!!!!!!!!wrong
Now i suffer from anxiety, and I didnt put that down on the part of the questionarre, about having emotional problems, so Im quite lucky that I came out okay, it could have been really bad,c onsidering people have gone through mini psychosis.

In New Zealand where I am from, I believe that we have one of the highest participants number per capita

That method goes right to deep structures in the brain -- where we
were in childhood and where we regress when processed through
Landmark. Its an age younger than when you learned critical thinking.

No so single person can rescue him until he has genuine doubts.

If he comes to your place,
do not let him in.

He may come back and profess doubts about Landmark.

Beware.

He's been through the advanced courses by now. He will likely
become thoroughly processed.

We have had pro Landmark trolls who have tried to disrupt discussions by pretending to seek healing from Landmark or claiming to have doubts about it.

Even if your BF expresses doubts about Landmark he might be pretending to do so.

For your own welfare do not be pulled into becoming his "therapist".

He may claim that only you understand him.

No. If he has any respect for you and how he hurt you, he'd be ashamed to ask you
to be his exit counselor.

He would seek his own counselor. And no, if he asks you to recommend someone,
tell him to do it himself.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 09/17/2017 11:24PM by corboy.