Anyway, I fought this past year and a half for me and my children! I realize now how strong I am and I am very very thankful for that. You stay strong for you and for your children and keep posting to the board as it was healing tool for me!
Although I'm kind of "trundeling behind" on this thread, I've read through all the pages here & it is so very upsetting to read all the individual stories here...
I am glad & very relieved for you that you have been able to carve out your own path away from your soon ex-to-be(?) husband. I can only imagine the pain, the sorrow & the despair that diabolic couple has created in your own home base. Same goes for the enough poster & all the others who have suffered because of the A-H Law of S***.
Although I came in touch with A-H only briefly back in 2002, it really deepend the whole 'attraction law' crapology that people like Louise Hay had begun to 'promote' with her "You can heal your Life" book. A-H were just the 'better' BS merchants (kind of comes with the territory what with a MLM 'rip-off' mentality trying to sell ice to the eskimos, if you get my drift...).
And even though A-H 'exploded' onto the "public new age circuit" with the 'help' of "The S**t-Creed", my then 'manifestation coach' had completely been done & sucked in by the whole A-H 'isms'.... When I finally had the 'questionable privilege' to see "The S**t-Creed" on wide screen, I well & soundly fell asleep during the screening! I had me a nice little nap!
I'd seen all these self-made con-men-/women before & had been 'overexposed' to them from the www.manifestyourlife.com website...which is why I probably had gotten tired of that lot by then given I knew their whole spiel inside outside & like the back of my hand.... Boooo
All 'hail n' glory' it wasn't either with the mostly European audience I was watching it with. Most of the viewers thought it was "typical American BS" & being completely obsessed with the 'acquisition' of material goods & filling one's pockets.
I 'saw' the original version - not that it made that much of a difference to me, as, like I said, I slept mostly through the 'movie' & woke up when it was over...
I am sorry to say though, that I had been 'spoon-fed' this LoA crap "theology" from various other sources over the course of several years. One of the things I could never really 'get my head around' was, for ex. that mentally & physically handicapped children would've 'asked for' it. Or other people with terminal illnesses (notably, children) or those born with HIV in the backstreets of South Africa, Zimbabwe or God knows in other forlorn places of the planet with no healthcare, no nothing, not even a reason to stay alive.
My mother used to work in a home for mentally & physically handicapped children & I grew up around them as a youngster & only those who have seen the heartache & helplessness parents of such children feel & are confronted with can truly emphasise & just be aghast at the unbelievable cruelty that betrays A-H 'isms' with 'a license to dish out unasked for advice' without thinking twice what craters these so-called "truths" can create in those affected.
Same goes for all the other 'stigmatised' unofficial "outcasts" of society that is 'defended' with a zombie-like 'self-justification programme' (which, the Law of S**t-Creed really is) of the "mind is absent - nobody home, come back later" Hicksters.
I have also long suspected that those who open themselves up for 'channelling' purposes often "attract" (there goes that word again - uuuueeehhhwww!!!) questionable & dubious 'spirits' that often 'cloak' themselves as "benign" when in fact it is always a very, very
mixed bag at best, & seriously
distorted at worst...
Certainly, the 'entities' "Esther" (what a biblical name!) seems to 'channel' are, what could at best be described as "sharks in sheeps' clothing" (in blue chip circles, or as in recent months, the wheeler dealers of Wall Street are referred to as 'sharks' - lawyers are the other professional body that are 'honoured' with that dubious label). If one is a good 'actor' one has a quite some presence, even if that 'presence' is iffy... Any good sales person knows who to put up a good front.
The one thing I learned & took away from it is that taking real responsibility for one's own life (including one's unresolved issues that one inevitably schlepps around [un-]awares if not taken care of properly & which then finds the "perfect" soil to 'grow' some utmost bizarre 'solutions' to much deeper lying problems that, even with the "best of intentions" no 'LoSC' can solve), taking action as & when required are quite different from what the LoCrap is teaching.
Still, as empty-handed as they are 'left behind' (reminds me of another sect! Yiikes!), the drones nonetheless continue to 'propagate' the very thing that destroys not only their families but a genuine sense of 'right' & 'wrong', of ethics & morale.
In addition, as has been noted here throughout the thread, it truly 'nurtures' & brings out an obsessive, childish sense of 'entitlement' (the screaming spoiled brat in the store comes to mind here...!), a 'de-lineation' from anything to do with reality as is given that the Law of S**t-Creed is all 'plastic' in the sense of a "plastic, i.e., 'malleable' universe".
Part of being a genuine grown-up, mature & hopefully balanced individual is to become one's own 'guru' (without any followers, please!) rather than listening to, or watching endless hours of "how to's" without getting off of one's own backside. That includes looking at what's "kaputt" in my backyard (i.e., my past unresolved hiccups) & get busy finding some real
professionals rather than pseudo-'help' doctors who just make the whole situation worse & leave ya back in the mud to waste away when you can't gather the energy anymore to get up on your own feet...
If anything, standing up for oneself, rather than "lying down & thinking of England" (metaphorically speaking), fighting tooth & nail for one's rights, shouting out one's disagreements, are the 'lessons' the LoS**t-Creed can teach. And sometimes being all "sweet & lovey dovey" just won't do the job.
We have a lot more power than we realise & sometimes adversity brings out the best in us, our true colours, our strength, our stamina & most importantly, our power to not back down until we get what we need. Often, there is an enormous difference between 'want' & 'need'.
I sum it up as "want" being/coming from the ego whereas need
is coming from our heart, the centre of our emotional hearth. The new age BS crapology often sorely ends up mixing up one with the other or, 'dismissing' the real 'need' (not the imagined) in importance over our 'want'....as is the example with your 'hubby'.
The need for justice is a universal need. The want for material acquisition is 'cultivated' in the industrialised nations very much to the detriment of those who don't even get their most basic daily needs taken care of.
Recognising the 'confusion' & blurred lines, it then is no longer an issue of "oh, I'll have to buy another book so I can do one better!", rather we can just find our own source as close to ourselves as possible.
When we heal
our hearts we can find the courage to leave this 'plastic crutch' behind that is so fragile that with the first strong gust of wind, it'll crack under our weight..
If we reclaim our true inherent
power, we don't need to go on a ridiculously expensive 'cruise' (cruising them bankaccounts while laughing all the way to the docks!) that not only has nothing to do with any bloody friggin' laws of "attraction", other than the 'law of selling', but more over, leaves us with a sense of "is/was this all there is? What next? What now?"
It took me a long time to get away from this sick mindfuck that it is, & I am still working on 'disentangling' myself more & more from this mean, ill-directed & plain nasty 'Law of S**t'. And, one of the primary reasons was, like I have said, that it didn't fill my empty heart... I had to learn to nurture that elsewhere (not
with a new sect/crapology, but with real people who worked professionally who are properly
to help people with just such issues).
These days, I prefer to be a hardnosed realist rather than to fall for any other "quick & easy" schemes, 'methodologies', any other BS lines or BS merchants (which there are plenty to be leery of!). And, I'd rather rely on my own common sense, my intuition, my BS radar/detector, my own brains & do as much as I am able to within my circumstances to cover my square butt (wink!) with taking action as I feel it's necessary, appropriate or called for.
I ain't waitin' no more for some 'miracle' "Law" to 'get going'... Like a bloody carrot on the stick! I was a donkey all right for way too long. Only thing for me left to do, was to step out of me donkey suit & stop "eeehing & aaahing" & get real, come back down to planet earth & create my own little niche here with what I have, know & what I learned. It's not that bad really...a nicely accumulated 'back log' of plenty of ups n' downs, being round the block a few times & being punched more often in my face than I care to remember. Oh well...I guess that makes me 'well-equipped'...
It's quite comforting to know I
am the master of my own
ship (no cruise necessary thank you very much!), I call the shots & if I don't like it, I walk away, or better yet, I call their bluff.
That way, I
at least can 'steer' my path with my own
compass & thus have a much more "here&now" sense of reality & it's in my hands of what I'm going to get.
Being in control as the grown ups we strive to be, in a world that would have us believe the opposite (& which, as a result, makes it so easy game for BS merchants to pull the out wads of cash of our pockets & our souls as an 'extra side-dish' to go along) is what makes all the difference, says "guilty as charged" (that'd be little me!).
Congratulations for coming out of this stronger. I hope the new year will bring you all still more clarity, sense of direction & purpose to you than the year you leave behind.