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The overall result of reading the book is that it has significantly deepened my concern that Ole has had far more control than any one man should have. While Ole struck me as a dominating personality, it seems even more clear that he has had too much control over many areas of TFI's culture. In fact he seems to be the creator of it. This troubled me from the beginning. This suspicion has now fully surfaced.
Nathan, you posted this a while back. Are you aware of how much you vacillate?
Good question. If you note in my previous post I actually mentioned that I thought I would have to forget Trinity because they have seemed to be doing people some real harm. I really have been through the experience of some disappointment there. I concede that Doug, and some ex-members have some valuable things to say to Trinity. It has just become my belief that all the blame cannot be put on them as a destructive cult, because I do not believe they are a full-blown destructive cult. There are two sides to this story, and those of you who are posting here would have me believe that your side is the only valid position. I have respectfully heard them, as I have respectfully heard you, and aquiesced when you wanted me to read the book. There are definitely two sides to this story. While some are judging TFI's lack of a public response as a failure to look honestly at themselves, I would say it is more of a grace. I have heard Doug say far more negative about TFI than I have heard Trinity say negative about Doug.(maybe that is because I've talked to Doug more) In my opinion a destructive cult would try to demonize someone like Doug, and while they are critical of Doug, I don't see them as hateful or unmerciful towards him.
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Just for the record Wendy's book did not come "out of the blue" as far as TF was concerned. Gary knew about it when she first started the book and then again when she began looking for a publisher. Another day another lie. I don't know if reconciliatin is possible either. You NathanA have been lied to once again, not that it will matter to you (though I pray it does). I know how beguiling this group can be. You probably think they see you as a hero. They don't. They see you as useful.
cultaware
But didn't the fact that she was writing a book about TFI come from "out of the blue"? It seems to me these things were written before Doug or Wendy sat down with them and said, "Look, these are the issues we have with you...If you do not come clean about these sins, Wendy is going to write a book that exposes you for what you are, and we will tell it to everyone." The very serious step of writing such a book and going public was taken before Trinity was allowed to have a fair discussion with them. You do not just send a few emails over time to your enemy, you make your best effort to sit down and ask those who have sinned against you to repent before you go that far. To the best of my knowledge, Doug and Wendy did not do that because Doug says he would be setting himself up to be abused again. Personally, I don't think he should have been afraid if he knew he really had the truth. I don't believe he would have really been placing himself in danger. I think Doug should have faced up to them first, before going on to accuse them of not doing the very thing he would not do. If he would like Trinity to repent, he ought to first go and confess this fault to them, and then and only then could he justly take up his case with them.
And by the way Cultaware, I don't give a flying flip if Trinity sees me as a hero. I think they had better put their money where their mouth is, and seek the reconcillation they supposedly desire. If they don't, they will prove to the world what hypocrites they truly are. It will certainly upset me to have given them the benefit of the doubt in this, and see them not seek peace with you. I think that would be fair grounds to say that your claims about them are in fact very true. I just think Doug needs to go to them first, as would have been fair to do before this book was written.