question lady Wrote:
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>
Quote
yg
Hi Solea
>
> The issue of authority is a big one, and if we
> e were not looking to authority outside of
> ourselves, or authority learned from outside of
> ourselves but now internalized, we would not be
> prey to so much.
>
> [snip]
>
> Getting free of the lure and the hypnotic
> influences of some these things I had to really go
> deeply into this authority issue and wanting to
> give my power away or another way to say it is
> always looking for Mommy and/or Daddy to tell me
> what to do. Either authority outside of myself,
> or internal learned authorities operating
> internally.
>
> yg
>
> This makes a lot of sense to me yg.
>
> Here is an excerpt from one of BK's books, A
> Thousand Names for Joy:
>
>
Quote
I was sitting once with a friend who had a
> huge tumor, and the doctors had given her just a
> few weeks to live. As I was leaving her bedside,
> she said, "I love you," and I said, "No, you
> don't. You can't love me until you love your
> tumor. Every concept that you put onto that tumor
> you'll eventually put onto me. The first time I
> don't give you what you want or threaten what you
> believe, you'll put that concept onto me." This
> might sound harsh, but my friend had asked me to
> always tell her the truth. The tears in her eyes
> were tears of gratitude, she said.
>
> [
www.thework.com]
>
> What struck me about this was the way the BK
> invaded this woman's boundaries and invalidated
> what she had just told her. BK ignored the woman's
> expression of love, then presumed to tell the
> woman that she did NOT love her, and even told her
> what she would do at some future date. To top it
> off, she says she did so because it was "the
> truth". Wow.
>
> The friend expressed her inner reality to BK and
> BK essentially said "no, that's not what you feel.
> I'll tell you what you feel." This is exactly the
> process Patricia Evans describes in her book
> "Controlling People." Evans says someone is trying
> to make a control connection when they define you,
> rather than respecting your right to define
> yourself.
>
> I am wondering, does anyone ever ask "Is is
> true?", in response to Katie's edicts about HOW IT
> IS.
Metaphor, to an embedded command, to a direct suggestion, to another embedded command. She's putting everyone listening in the vulnerable spot of being hospitalized with cancer. She's telling them to love her. She's then preframing by using a strange direct suggestion: she is the cancer inside of you, doing bad things to your body and health, and she caused bad things to happen to you. This may be handling objections, which is part of the NLP sales close:
1: Get rapport;
2: ask questions;
3: find a need/desire;
4: link the desire to what you're selling;
5: close and handle objections.
She goes on to preframe that it sounds harsh, to handle objections, but she gives a suggestion that they expect her to always tell the truth, and that she does. She then suggests through the metaphor and a quote that you will shed tears of joy. Also, by linking the love for her to the cancer, she's telling you to love cancer.