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Lady Pleiades
I also relate to your situation and, luckily, was able to move to another state, but knowing that some of my old friends probably believed the slander. To recover, I found several things that helped: filing legal complaints, having professionals tell me again and again that what the cult did was crazy and harmful, and finally the good feelings I get from knowing that I KNEW it was wacky which is why I left. I knew it would be hard to leave for all the reasons that are happening now. I have been out for several years. It gets better, but it does take time. Be gentle with yourself. I found that the institutions that are the least dogmatic are of some comfort to me. Books about grief and loss, too.
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Lady Pleiades
I also relate to your situation and, luckily, was able to move to another state, but knowing that some of my old friends probably believed the slander.
Thank you for sharing.
One thing i've acquired is an intune keen ear for the kind language and insinuations used in my former cult experiences among the members.
I moved to another state for several reasons unrelated to the cult. I will not move again.
As for the delibrate malicious lies and slander doesn't impact me too greatly because i now understand in cults there are no true friendships. And my true friends and family are not in the cult and my personal life doesn't reflect the lies and slander. As you know the slander is to blind the remaining members to the truth and evoke fear for control not so much about the singled out member.
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Lady Pleiades
To recover, I found several things that helped: filing legal complaints, having professionals tell me again and again that what the cult did was crazy and harmful, [b:67fcc14fb0]and finally the good feelings I get from knowing that I KNEW it was wacky which is why I left. I knew it would be hard to leave for all the reasons that are happening now.[/b:67fcc14fb0]
Interesting...
In my case, I suffered the stalking infatuations of several men who developed dangerous obsessions with me to the point of making me into a martyr and labeling me 'Hagar' and 'Mary' in the bible to justify their illegal and unethical conduct toward me. I never truely had positive experiences within the cult because all the years spent inside the cult was dedicated to making me accustomed to abuse, subjecting me to dangerous promoted envy and jealousy, and trying to brainwash me by the abusers who were obsessed over the fact my self autonomous state which was termed as "arrogance" it was too strong for their ususal methods that has successfully worked for 75 years, yet needed and wanted my innate gifts to further their program. The harder i fought the more abusive and evil the methods to brainwash me became.
My abusive experiences is all about control and nothing else. I could never get away from the men in the cult or escape the promoted vicious envy and jealousy among the women.
It has always amazed me that sincere people committed to the mission work are lied to and abused. What is the purpose for using mind control in claiming it is needed to get people to do the work when most come naturally and sincerely already committed to doing the work?
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Lady Pleiades
I have been out for several years. It gets better, but it does take time. Be gentle with yourself. I found that the institutions that are the least dogmatic are of some comfort to me. [b:67fcc14fb0]Books about grief and loss, too.[/b:67fcc14fb0]
Interesting that you would describe your experiences as a lost.
In my case, there is no love lost. I was enthralled in the schemes of higher ups who never had my best interest at heart and used me for selfish purposes. I know the torment and depth of misery in the lives of my abusers. It is their lost not mine.
To the demise of many I am healthy and very happy beyond the cult and not one day since leaving have I lived in grief over not being involved with the cult.
It was my curiosity and desire to learn and understand that took me back into their midst via the internet as I sought deep study concerning the insanity and corruption justified as methods and logic within the cult handling of innocent persons some of whom have killed themselves over their experiences within the group. I needed to understand the history and science used for my own recovery and to help others in the future.
I do not wish to fight the organization. My only wish is to help those in simialr situations regardless of the group in the future to recover successfully as many do not heal. I am one of the lucky ones. I also want it understood that I want absolutely nothing to do with its doctrine or members. These people have exceeed the limits. I innocently fell into the cluthes of a more fundalmentalist offshoot group in the doctrine via the internet, people I do not know, who violated several criminal laws in devising a plan to lure me off the website into physical attendance into their group who have threatened me and speak of using intimidation in further pursuing me against my wishes.
I want it understood that using the 75 year old history to keep tabs on me in the future will not be tolerated. I want it adhered to and understood that I will not be returning or believe in their doctrine. Seeking law enforcement is within in the right of anyone facing a group with a documented record spaning 75 years of using intimidation to force persons into membership.
I made the mistake of falling into the "stockholm syndrome" in believing my former abusers were not as bad as the current ones who proselytize
on the internet and believed the slogans about change only to realize I was being violated the same way as before only with different faces and names who joined forces with former abusers who made plans and battled over what group I would be made to join behind my back without my knowledge or permission.
Your suggestion that a less dogmatic group is questionable as cult members have a tendancy to believe that everyone needs to be involved in some kind of religious group. It is as if cult members encourage and believe in institutionalizing persons and gives a partial explanation why some members tend to float from one to group to another within the same doctrine; because you are taught that you are nothing without the doctrine.
It is also another way to keep tabs on former members as leaders from various offshoots of the doctrine share information about members so yu never really get away from the reputation intentionally made for you as no one is allowed to remain "Green" there is a need to throw dirt on you in order to control you and tie you to scripture in keeping you caught up in a maze forever fighting lies and proving yourself trustworthy, and sincere as malicious gossip and slander is encouraged to keep victims confused and exposed to verbal and emotional abuse, a tactic to promote false humility as most members unaware of the psychological assault, which is a training method to make members see abuse as normal and a part of the spiritual experiences needed to see the hearafter, those unware eventually breakdown and conform to the cult wishes as you tire over fighting the never ending intentional slander and lies in hope of proving yourselves innocent.
Personally, my perspective on religion (way of life) has changed forever.
Thank you for an eye opening exchange. :D