THe question I want to ask Cherie Aills...Cherie Phillips
Posted by: chaupil ()
Date: May 25, 2006 01:04AM

Is What hurt you so much that you feel you had to hurt me to heal it?

You hurt someone I Love and respect, me. I am worthy and important to many. My heart was not yours for the taking. I deserve better. You leave a trail of broken hearts and dreams--You think only of you and feel for no one unless you need something from them and then that is only a ruse--a mask worn only for a time so that you may have your reward. You project. You harm and you blame everyone but you. Remorse is a foreign concept.
I am not disposable. No one is. I am not the first and I am sure, not the last. Because I do not have the gift of indifference you sport, I cannot just run as you do. Indifference is a place where you dwell---where reality is distorted that makes you the victim and ultimate victor as committment to you means nothing. It's always just about you. You've indoctrinated yourself well and with help, and without the ability to think and feel for others, without true compassion and empathy you are an empty shell destined to "allways" be alone even when others are present with you and for you. You take no time to learn about you, no time to heal so that you stop your sojourns of hurt--you fake healing others so as to not address your own issues. You are a trust bandit and a coward. It is me who is strong and you who are weak. There are days I loathe you and other days I understand your wounds. You've lived enough life to know by now right and wrong--you do make conscious choices and you have been doing so for some time. It is time you make a right choice and end the charade. It is time to finally be honest and step out from behind the wall of deception and shame and into the light. It is time you stop running and set free the pain you harbor and dispense. May you learn from this and may you finally know you. May you finally stop hurting other people...God be with you...

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