I am not really sure what to say here. I may end up adding more later as I think of things so please forgive me. I am going to use the lingo too because I want to make sense to myself. This is actually going to be in parts because I need to think about each area and need less distraction when I write.

My mother did the Landmark forum back in the 90's. I was never ever interested in it. She never really "enrolled" me. Knowing what I know now, I look back on and really press that point. She never "enrolled" me. I never got she ever listened or heard my frustration with our relationship because it was all ok with her, but she never got it ok with me.

I married my husband 5 years ago. It has been up and down. reasons why are really not important, it is the usual reasons why. Nothing too terribly pressing or depressing.

A year ago my mother convinced him to take the forum. He attended the introduction and signed up without even discussing it with me. The problem with him is he is not always a man of his word even though he wants to be. He does let his exhaustion get the best of him sometimes and it bothers him. He would even go to blame others for his lacking because he never spoke up. With that being said the lingo to bring him to "authenticity" really hit home with him. More than ever. It was even more important than living within the actual financial realms set in place for us. Anything I said was unreasonable.

He took the forum and came home Sunday night all super happy and crap. He was trying desperately to look in my eyes and get me on his level. I was pissed off. I was pissed he was so damn happy. He was using this lingo I didn't understand and not only that , I WAS NOT ALL FRIGGIN HAPPY ABOUT LIFE LIKE HE WAS. It was like if I didn't get him right there then I was being the asshole. All I can say is we went DOWNHILL from there.
Fast. I just needed some compassion and it wasn't there.

The only call I got during his forum was one on Saturday. He said he would like to help me with the finances. That was it. I thought, you are spending all this money to tell me you need to help with the finances? What about all the crap between us right now? What about us and our family? But all I said was, "ok". I was expecting some major revolution about himself and all he came up with was that. So by Sunday I was more than livid.

In the meantime, my mother's girlfriend was taking the advanced course.
Now this woman is a salesperson. Not only that, she is a bitch too. She just is. If live is not falling in her direction, EVERYONE KNOWS IT. Even if you are just visiting for the night. She is controlling and selfish. A few days ago a felt bad for having this perception of her. Now, not so much.

As I go on you will agree with me.

So now it is a problem with me because I haven't taken the forum and *maybe* I should have been the one to take it first instead of my husband. At this point I am so desperate I will try anything.

TBC

melissapissa,

I was involved in a group called PSI Seminars. From what I understand it's very similar to Landmark. I understand your frustration with the things going on in your life. Please think of yourself before you fall for this. I wasted several years and relationships on PSI only to wake up and find that I lost a lot more than I gained. You can be happy, not not at the cost of your mind.

Please think of what this could do to you. Look at what it's done to your husband in so short a period of time.

I will pray for you.

Landmark is not the answer to a 'troubled' relationship. Those who invest in its doctrine will follow a predictable path, ie feeling high, feeling strong, feeling as though they have finally cracked the 'meaning of life'.

Beware. Just as predictably, unless they continue to invest, all these feelings will dissipate - it is very, very much like a drug-induced state of mind. With the high will come the fall. This is guaranteed. I've seen it dozens of times.

If you want to 'save' your relationship you will have to remain calm and strong, but most importantly, you'll will have to seek professional counselling. Real professionals, not the business-trained Landmarkians.

What you are experiencing has been shared here by many other people. I know that's no comfort except for you to realise that you're not alone.

Do you have trusted friends and family you could confide in?

I understand things from a Landmark perspective and outside of Landmark perspective. What kind of feedback to you want? And how are things these days? What kind of specific day-to-day problems? Is your hubby doing lots of Landmark activity still?

I too am extremely sorry to hear your troubles.

Hang in there, your in my prayers also.

Quote
melissapissa
So now it is a problem with me because I haven't taken the forum and *maybe* I should have been the one to take it first instead of my husband. At this point I am so desperate I will try anything.

TBC

Will there ever be an end to this? Will these landmark criminals ever stop?

Melissa, you have my prayers too. Don't give up hope.