Dont get financially entangled with them, no matter what. And the longer you stay anxious and stressed, the more tired you will be and that will put you at risk of 1) making a harmful decision and 2) getting accident prone.
It sounds like you know you are involved (however peripherally) with a bad organization. Adults cannot transform for the better if subjected to emotional abuse.
This article will help you see exactly how this group is subverting its own stated goals.
If you have the time, you can try and do Google searches (both Google and the Google groups) on each of the staff members' names. It will be interesting and informative to find out what other groups or teachers they got involved with before starting the ITL
Am curious--are they in the SF/Bay Area, or are they still confined to the Chapel Hill/NC?
I am afraid there is not much you can do for your former boss. She's already made such a heavy commitment and lost both her marriage (and a pot of money) that she's probably hell bent on justifying her affiliation with the group.
She will probably only leave when she becomes so exhausted that she loses the energy to sustain the state of illusion she's currently in. As long as we have enough energy reserves to give ourselves boosts of adrenalin, we can justify damn near any amount of abuse.
Its usually when people are just plain exhausted, physically, as well as financially, that they begin to question the situation. And that point of adrenal depletion/exhaustion is different for everyone.
Your boss knows you're concerned and that is enough. She may contact you later, if she comes to her senses. In the meantime, Id recommend finding another place to work so you can get out of there. Thanks for warning us. If you like, go to [www.craigslist.org
] look for a city near your area and consider posting a warning about this group. You can supply the URL to this thread in the RR.com discussion section.
Try and get out of there ASAP. The winter holidays are not far off, and 1) they are high stress and 2) its tempting to put off major decisions 'Until after the holidays'.
Good luck. Let us know how you're doing!