Father joins Landmark
Date: June 30, 2006 07:32AM
Good evening (well, its evening HERE anyway),
First off, I have read the last three solid pages of threads in this particular forum, and nearly every other article on this site. The resources that are available are nothing short of phenomenal.
My particular situation appears to resonate differently with me than the majority of the others posted from concerned friends and family members, which is the only reason why I am starting a new thread. Basically, I am looking for more feedback about my specific situation.
And here it is. Ill try to keep this as brief as possible. I appreciate your taking the time to read in advance:
I am 30 yrs old, and married. My father and stepmother recently joined Landmark together. They invited me to join them for their Tuesday night graduation. Initially I had hoped to go along with my wife (I knew nothing about the Forum, I just wanted to be there for my Dad because he asked). However due to circumstances outside of my control, we ended up not being able to go. My father did ask why (mainly money, their seminar was in Cincinnatti which is a two hour drive each way, and we were already short on cash at that point in the month). He offered to give us a ride, and I would have accepted except that my wife really had a lot of work to do. Since we had never committed to going, I felt a bit of sorrow that I could not be there for him, but no guilt. My father did not push the issue at all, and said that he understood.
This past weekend my dad mentioned that there was a seminar in Cincinnatti on Tuesday, and that he was able to bring a guest. My wife was unavailable, but I was free. I gladly accepted his invitation. At this point he has told me a great deal about how the Forum has changed his life, and offered some basic insights into how and what a few of the exercises were. Most importantly, he is focused on how it has helped him in his life.
[b:a52c532831]This intrigues me, because my father has been a relatively unhappy person his entire life.[/b:a52c532831] He is brilliant, and a leading educator in the field of literacy. While he is gregarious and a skilled conversationalist, he is also generally unhappy. I dont think he ever quite figured himself out.
[b:a52c532831]What I notice in him now is an amazing reversal.[/b:a52c532831] He appears both far more lucid, but also far more honest with himself, his wife, and with me. My stepmother appears to have enjoyed a similar transformation, and I must admit that I find her far more interesting to talk to than I have for the previous 20 years of their marriage.
In short, from my perspective into the operation of these individuals in their native environments (i.e., away from the forum) is that they appear more happy, healthy, and confident than they ever have before.
With that in mind, I go to the seminar with them. I'll spare you the details, as they are easily recounted in all of their variations in other posts on these boards. I got the hard sell, declined, and moved on to meet up with my dad and stepmom again.
Driving home I was conflicted. I felt like I had just witnessed...something...that I wasn't entirely ok with. I couldnt place my finger on it. During the exercise for the newcomers, I was the only one in my group who was utterly without any emotional connection by the end of the activity. I dont have a reasonable explanation why, except that at this point in my life, I simply do not have much emotional baggage. Everyone in my group, on the other hand, seemed to be suffering from a great many regrets and emotional hurdles.
[b:a52c532831]I came home, and stayed up till about 3am doing research on the Landmark Forum.[/b:a52c532831] Much of it was on this site, as well as LECs own site and many others. I have come to the conclusion that even if I was NOT slightly wary of the Forums past and present techniques, it is not for me.
So here is the crux I am presented with: I am concerned that this may be a poor influence on my father, but I have absolutely NO empirical evidence that supports that conclusion. My father is not displaying many of the more troubling symptoms of "lekkies" as described on these boards. Instead, I have seen a very real and very positive change in him.
What should I do or say, if anything? [b:a52c532831]My question to all of you is: Can this be a GOOD thing for some people, as it appears it may be for my father and stepmother? [/b:a52c532831] I dont think I will ever stop being wary or watchful for the destructive behavioral patterns described in these forums, but CAN this be a good thing for some? Obviously I want to believe so, but I would like feedback on that.
I appreciate any and all responses.
[b:a52c532831][i:a52c532831]P.S. : My apologies for the somewhat grotesque nature of my username. I have been using it for years in online gaming, and it is simply habit. Please look past that, if possible.[/i:a52c532831][/b:a52c532831]