Dear Demon,
I am sorry to hear you have been ostracized by family and friends. Leaving "The Church" in Utah can be pretty rough.
I was raised mormon, in Utah, but got out at an early age. Fortunately, my immediate and extended, mostly mormon, family has continued to love me and include me consistent with the mormon emphasis on the importance of family. I realize this is not everyone's experience and I am sorry it has not been yours.
Whether the church is a cult or not - I don't know. I do think it is overall destructive to it's members. There isn't much room for individuality. Being a mormon woman is pretty much a Stepford Wives experience.
Regarding the selection of a new prophet, I have never understood it to be a democratic process. I was always told that the identity of the new prophet is "revealed" to the "quorom of tweleve". As a practical matter, it is always one of them.
I was surprised to hear of these restrictions:
Quote
Demon of Kolob
Extreme Sexual rules even for Married. No oral ,rectal ,birth control, toys,dirty talk etc.
Certainly my devout mormon parents and siblings use birth control (and do some of the other stuff too). My understanding is that LDS encourages people to have as many children as possible because there are spirits who are waiting for bodies, but there is no prohibition on using birth control.