Dear concernedmom83, I am an ex-cult member of a cult with a relatively similar believe structure and behaviour as Desteni, and have spent the past year educating myself on cult psychology (which falls under social psychology) and personality disorders of cult leaders.
I'm afraid when it comes to destructive cults, South Africans are rather uninformed, because the problem isn't as prolific here as it is in the States for example
From
Captive Hearts Captive Minds:
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In America today an estimated 5000 cults have affected over 10 million people. Whether their focus is religion, politics, therapy or self-improvement, cults exact an inestimable cost, both emotionally and financially, from those who join. Sensitively written by two former cult members, this book provides the hands-on help ex-cultists need to recover from manipulation and mind control.
Education is the only way to combat cults. I will share my most helpful sources with you.
The Cult Leader - Personality Disorders:Firstly, to understand the poor psychological condition of the cult leader/s, one needs to have a good grasp on narcissism and psychopathology. Cult leaders are without exception all narcissists. Narcissitic Personality Disorder (NPD) is a poorly understood psychological disease. Psychopathology often enters the picture with cult leaders as well.
Narcissism is frequently misunderstood as excessive egotism. In fact, what distinguishes the narcissist is not the strength of their egos, but their weak sense of self, their thin attachment to any tradition or community, their inability to form lasting relationships, or to take comfort from the past. In a word, narcissists are uprooted persons. They are prone to exalted fantasies of fame and power because these help to firm up a chronically weak sense of self.
A great deal has been written about narcissism.
See here.The fraudulent money scams they're perpetrating might make
Snakes in Suits: When Psychopaths Go to Work a must read as well.
Also check out
The Sociopath Next DoorThe above reading is crucial for understanding what you are dealing with. There is no reasoning, rationalizing or talking sense with a malignant narcissist or sociopath.
The bizarre belief system and behaviour of the cult leader also make it likely that he is
schizophrenic.
From
Captive Hearts Captive Minds - Madeline Landau Tobias and Janja Lalich (p. 67):
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The Cult Leader as Psychopath
Glibness/Superficial charm
Glibness is a hallmark of psychopaths. They are able to use language effortlessly to beguile, confuse, and convince. They are captivating storytellers. They exude self-confidence and are able to spin a web that intrigues others and pulls them into the psychopath's life. Most of all, they are persuasive. Frequently they have the capacity to destroy their critics verbally or disarm them emotionally.
Manipulative and Cunning
Cult leaders do not recognize the individuality or rights of others, which makes all self-serving behaviors permissible. The hallmark of the psychopath is the psychopathic maneuver; which is essentially interpersonal manipulation "based on charm. The manipulator appears to be helpful, charming, even ingratiating or seductive, but is covertly hostile, domineering....The victim is perceived as an aggressor, competitor, or merely as an instrument to be used....The manipulation inevitably becomes the end-all and is no longer qualified by the reality principle." In other words, there are no checks on the psychopath's behavior - anything goes. The Psychopath divides the world into suckers, sinners, and himself. He discharges powerful feelings of terror and rage by dominating and humiliating his victims. He is particularly successful when, through an overlay of charm, he makes an ally of his victim - a process sometimes described as emotional vampirism or emotional terrorism. Examples of this type of manipulation are plentiful in the literature of Jonestown and other cultic groups. It is especially prevalent in the one-on-one cultic relationship, where there is direct involvement with the manipulator.
Grandiose Sense of Self
The cult leader enjoys tremendous feelings of entitlement. He believes everything is owed to him as a right. Preoccupied with his own fantasies, he must always be the center of attention. He presents himself as the "Ultimate One" enlightened, a vehicle of God, a genius, the leader of humankind, and sometimes even the most humble of humble. He has an insatiable need for adulation and attendance. His grandiosity may also be a defense against inner emptiness, depression, and a sense of insignificance. Paranoia often accompanies the grandiosity, reinforcing the isolation of the group and the need for protection against a perceived hostile environment. In this way, he creates an us-versus-them mentality.
Pathological Lying
Psychopaths lie coolly and easily, even when it is obvious they are being untruthful. It is almost impossible for them to be consistently truthful about either a major or minor issue. They lie for no apparent reason, even when it would seem easier and safer to tell the truth. This is sometimes called "crazy lying." Confronting their lies may provoke an unpredictably incense rage or simply a Buddha-like smile.
Another form of lying common among cult leaders is known as pseudologica fantastica, an extension of pathological lying. Leaders tend to create a complex belief system, often about their own powers and abilities, in which they themselves sometimes get caught up. "It is often difficult to determine whether the lies are an actual delusional distortion of reality or are expressed with the conscious or unconscious intent to deceive. These manipulators are rarely original thinkers. Plagiarists and thieves, they seldom credit the true originators of ideas, often co-opting authorship. They are extremely convincing, forceful in the expression of their views, and talented at passing lie detector tests. For them, objective truth does not exist. The only "truth" is whatever will best achieve the outcome that meets their needs. This type of opportunism is very difficult to understand for those who are not psychopaths. For this reason, followers are more apt to invent or go along with all kinds of explanations and rationales for apparent inconsistencies in behavior "I know my guru must have had a good reason for doing this." "He did it because he loves me even though it hurts."
The Christ Complex – Mara Sophia Ellen Weis R.O., ThD.D.Cult Psychology:Take Back Your Life: Recovering from Cults and Abusive RelationshipsCults in Our Midst: The Continuing Fight Against Their Hidden MenaceCaptive Hearts, Captive Minds: Freedom and Recovery from Cults and Abusive RelationshipsCombatting Cult Mind Control: The #1 Best-selling Guide to Protection, Rescue, and Recovery from Destructive CultsRepairing The Soul After A Cult - Janja Lalich, Ph.D.Brainwashing: The Science of Thought ControlRick Ross – Warning SignsThe Guru Papers: Masks of Authoritarian PowerThought Reform and the Psychology of Totalism: A Study of Brainwashing in ChinaCult Recovery 101 - video
Cult Recovery 201 - video
Robert Jay Lifton interviewed by Steve Hassan [See disclaimer concerning Steve Hassan below] July 13th 2011 - video
Social Psychology (optional):Youtube: The Solomon Asch Conformity Experiment - 4:10 - Groupthink, conformity and suppression of dissent
Sway: The Irresistible Pull of Irrational BehaviorWhen Prophecy Fails: A Social and Psychological Study of a Modern Group That Predicted the Destruction of the WorldMistakes Were Made (But Not by Me): Why We Justify Foolish Beliefs, Bad Decisions, and Hurtful ActsOn Being Certain: Believing You Are Right Even When You're NotTerror management theory~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A few last very useful articles:Inside the cult controversies: Recovery from abusive groups - Joe Szimhart
Razor's Edge Indeed: Cult behavior defined - Joe Szimhart
(
Joe Szimhart is a good source on cult psychology.)
Traumatic Abuse in Cults: A Psychoanalytic Perspective - Daniel Shaw, C.S.W.
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I did not read the entire thread, I just read a few of your posts. You are likely already familiar with some of the above sources.
I wish you all the best!
Disclaimer regarding Steve Hassan
The Ross Institute of New Jersey/May 2013See [
www.culteducation.com]
The inclusion of news articles within the Ross Institute of New Jersey (RI) archives, which mention and/or quote Steven Hassan, in no way suggests that RI recommends Mr. Hassan or recognizes him in any way.
News articles that mention Steve Hassan have been archived for historical purposes only due to the information they contain about controversial groups, movements and/or leaders.
RI does not recommend Steven Hassan.
RI has received serious complaints about Steve Hassan concerning his fees. Mr. Hassan does not publicly disclose his fee schedule, but according to complaints Steve Hassan has charged fees varying from $250.00 per hour or $2,500.00 per day to $500.00 per hour or $5,000.00 per day. This does not include Mr. Hassan's expenses, which according to complaints can be quite substantial.
Steven Hassan has charged families tens of thousands of dollars and provided questionable results. One recent complaint cited total fees of almost $50,000.00. But this very expensive intervention effort ended in failure.
Dr. Cathleen Mann, who holds a doctorate in psychology and has been a licensed counselor in the state of Colorado since 1994 points out, "Nowhere does Hassan provide a base rate and/or any type or accepted statistical method defining his results..."
Steve Hassan has at times suggested to potential clients that they purchase a preliminary report based upon what he calls his "BITE" model. These "BITE reports" can potentially cost thousands of dollars.
See [
corp.sec.state.ma.us]
Steve Hassan runs a for-profit corporation called "Freedom of Mind." Mr. Hassan is listed as the corporate agent for that business as well as its president and treasurer.
RI does not recommend "Freedom of Mind" as a resource.
RI also does not list or recommend Steve Hassan's books.
To better understand why Mr. Hassan's books are not recommended by RI read this detailed review of his most recently self-published book titled "Freedom of Mind."
See [
www.cultnews.com]
Steve Hassan's cult intervention methodology has historically raised concerns since its inception. The book "Recovery from Cults" (W.W. Norton & Co. pp. 174-175) edited by Dr. Michael Langone states the following:
"Calling his approach 'strategic intervention [sic] therapy,' Hassan (1988) stresses that, although he too tries to communicate a body of information to cultists and to help them think independently, he also does formal counseling. As with many humanistic counseling approaches, Hassan’s runs the risk of imposing clarity, however subtly, on the framework’s foundational ambiguity and thereby manipulating the client."
RI has also learned that Mr. Hassan has had dual-relationships with his counseling clients. That is, clients seeing Mr. Hassan for counseling may also do professional cult intervention work with him.
Professionals in the field of cultic studies have also expressed concerns regarding Steven Hassan's use of hypnosis and Neuro-linguistic programming (NLP).
Based upon complaints and the concerns expressed about Mr. Hassan RI does not recommend Steve Hassan for counseling, intervention work or any other form of professional consultation.
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/10/2013 09:19PM by rrmoderator.