It’s not what you know that counts; it’s what people think you know.
It can be very hard to be me. You have to understand what I go through and my consternation when it comes to religion and politics.
Ever since I came back from Israel in ’95 and wound up on Federal Social Security Disability benefits, I am like the proverbial Humpty Dumpty. All the king’s horses and all the king’s men have been trying to put me back together again.
I am in a housing program, get therapy, and also have a job counselor. I am trying to resurrect myself financially from the proverbial dead. If I manage to make a career as a freelance writer finally, I will have achieved a financial “tichiyat hamatim” (“resurrection of the dead”) that would rival Jesus Christ’s. But I am not trying to get doctrinal here as preaching is against the rules of this forum.
One problem I have always had is that people cut me no slack and give me little in the way of respect sometimes. I feel like the late Rodney Dangerfield (“I don’t get no respect”). I will explain.
If I come off like an Orthodox Jew, people get offended by me and attack me for being “too Jewish” or “the enemy.” And if I dress down and try to assimilate, people start to give me lectures about Jewish religious topics that I know infinitely more about than them. It’s hard to strike a happy medium.
I will illustrate with the following examples:
Some yeas ago, I was in a local Laundromat and a pert, young woman who looked very stylish started talking about the “ancient Israelites” and looked and me and started to giggle. It seemed to me that she was a Christian who is involved in some form of study of the New Testament. I imagine the fact that I am visually very much identifiable as a Jew of Ashkenazi heritage is an issue.
I thought to myself, if this woman were to meet an ancient Israelite, she would appear to be the strangest looking creature to him and she would not really be able to dialogue or understand him either. He wouldn’t think too much of her either and that might be a shock to her but it wouldn’t be to me. Neither would be prepared to deal with the other.
Furthermore, although I may look somewhat plain and unimpressive, I bring with me a rich background in Jewish culture and religion of a variety of experiences. I have lived in Israel for about 4 and ½ years, I went to college there, studied in Haredi yeshivas there
and in Brooklyn and know more about Judaism and Christianity than most people that I know. In fact, I forgot more about Judaism and Christianity then most people know.
The background that I have is appreciated in the various Christian congregations that I go to. I participate in 3 churches and go to sermons, Bible Studies and other events where my knowledge of the Torah and also the New Testament prove useful.
But years ago, I decided to assimilate as best as I could after I bombed out with Chabad in ’88. I was not able to do so.
As soon as I went to the shop floor at AT&T, people who wanted some information from me about Judaism and Jewish politics approached me. Some of my coworkers actually were trying to give me an “education” as to the languages used in certain prayers and also tried to tell me what language the Talmud was written in. I had to argue with them and when I convinced them that I knew what I was talking about then I got some respect.
The truth is that I probably learned certain prayers that Jesus Christ himself actually learned as per the Kedusha – Sanctification - (aka the Shemonah Esrai – 18 Benedictions or Amidah – Standing Prayer). It’s a long story but Jesus definitely did know common beliefs and practices that the Jews had and did at his day and age.
Some people seem to think that whatever the Jews were doing before Jesus was valid and they were on the right path then. But after Jesus, the Jews (of which I am one) were off spiritually.
John MacArthur wrote in Twelve Ordinary Men, that the fact that Jesus established his new religious order without using any mainstream Jewish religious leader was a condemnation of the Pharisees, Sadducees and the scribes. Simply put, he used the common man to create his order. Personally, I find all of this hard to take.
To be sure, over the millennia some Jewish leaders who actually had smicha (“rabbinic ordination”) actually did convert to Christianity. How good were they and what was the caliber of their scholarship? I don’t know the answer to that, but some Jews, even supposedly knowledgeable ones became Christians and vice versa.
Some years ago, when I was a computer programmer/analyst working for AT&T one of my bosses who was Catholic got into a conversation with me about Hebrew. I studied Hebrew for years in a Hebrew School and also learned modern conversational Hebrew in Israel. That is I know both ancient and modern Hebrew. But my boss told me, “I’m not talking about Modern Hebrew, I am talking about ancient Hebrew.” I should have told him that I went to “ancient Hebrew School!” I did such for 4 nights a week, three hours a night too. And I got grades that were at the top of my class at Suffolk Jewish Center in Deer Park, LI, NY.
I also got into an argument with him about the situation with the Palestinians and I was not too sympathetic back then. In retrospect, I have to admit what happened to them was terrible. You have to realize that the Pope told his flock to dialogue with people about religion and politics.
Basically, my take on it is that 6 million Jews died as the world did nothing (and in fact, some Catholics killed Jews too) and now after that fact, the world has a “conscience”. I also think that such a Palestinian State might be used as a base for anti-American and anti-Israel activity. There are Moslem extremist groups that want to over throw every non-Moslem regime and I find that hard to take. As such, I am at least skittish as per the establishment of a homeland for them.
Many years ago, when I was on a date with my girlfriend at the time I was in the Ben Yishai cult, my girlfriend said, “Christian Dior.” I replied, “Hebrew Christian Dior!” She giggled over it. We have to analyze this as follows:
As a member of Ben Yishai, I wore modern style, fashionable clothing that made me look marketable for a boss. This is juxtaposed to what happened when I hooked up with Chabad after I got my Master of Science in Management degree from Boston University.
I was just mistaken. I really thought God really wanted me to dress like an Haredi Jew and assimilate into Chabad.
My dad kept screaming at me, “You don’t have money for a streimel (fur brimmed Chasidic style hat) and a kapoteh (frock coat). Shave your beard, grow your hair back (I got a yeshivisher style haircut which he called “a monkey haircut”) and make yourself look marketable for a boss.” Luckily, I managed to survive my own error. And people reading my postings can benefit.
My dad always says, “It’s not what you know that counts, it’s what people think you know.” My question is how to tailor myself so that people know about my comprehensive background in Judaism, Christianity and also in Islam as I have studied the latter too.

Hi Richard, we share the same name except my middle name begins with a J.

Anyhow, reading your post I can sympathise/empathise, I too have skills and knowledge that would surprise folks if they gave me a chance to display. The thing is, if you/we seek others' approval we are forever their servant. So cut loose, be yourself and if people don't recognise you for who you are then it's their loss.