Hello, I'm writing to ask for any advice you can offer with the situation my wife's family are in. My wife's sister has for the best part of two years been cutting off contact with family and friends starting a relationship with an individual who subscribes to the cult/thinking of Rudolf Steiner (Apparently they read his "work" everyday) with my sister in law's mind becoming less of her own and starting to believe in some really bizarre ideals. Her partner has a son but doesn't believe in being a father to them as he doesn't want them to grow up with any dependencies on anyone. So he never sees them nor supports his family.

It is true that my sister in law has always had a turbulent relationship with her mum as they are too similar in character (I believe this turbulent relationship is being used as the main driving force to keep her separate as she was citing trivial things from 20 years ago as reasons to not be in her parents lives) and about 6 months ago she told her parents not to be in touch with her, replying very angrily when they have tried. They have been the most caring parents they could have possibly been all their years (though possibly to the point of harm) as they have always been afraid that they would lose her if they stopped giving in to her demands (mostly financial) and though this continued to the point where her parents literally had nothing left to give, my sister in law is adamant that she has had very little help from her parents, an opinion we believe being re-enforced by her new partner and an anthroposophic doctor (Again, Steiner related) who "treats" her. This "doctor" has also advised cutting herself off from family.
They have now stopped trying as they are scared of being blocked on the phone. She has started blocking friends (Friends who have supported her for years both emotionally and financially) sending them very cruel messages and blocking their phone numbers so they can't be in touch. She has always been a person who adapted to the thoughts and life styles of what partner she had at the time and so we feel there is no way to get through to her as she seems to be treating this new partner as some sort of deity.
We know deep down that my sister in law is not happy but that she sees this new life as a way to avoid confronting her fears. She has for a long time been someone who runs away from problems and explodes when confronted with whatever responsibilities she is ignoring at the time.
My wife has not seen her in over two years and has not heard from her sister in a year and a half. She is too scared to be in touch with her as there is a more than likely chance that she will receive a nasty reply and then be blocked. My wife knows from her parents that her sister was demanding to be left alone for "an undertermined amount of time".
Other than the risk of trying to be in touch and being rejected, my wife is at a loss as to what she can do.

Any help or advice you could offer would be greatly appreciated. Many thanks for your time in reading this post.

Kind regards

C

Hello Mod,

Is it possible to edit thread titles and posts. I'm wondering if I posted maybe too much info on who the problem is with and should cut some of that out?

Many thanks

C