Lulu: Welcome to the forum. It's a good sign that new people are signing on. You have raised a lot of curiosity with your Beatles reference. Hmmm... I believe and hope, that with new participants to this site, we will continue to see total and complete exposure of the truth. Just two of what are probably many areas still hiding in the dark are the Trust finances and the direct sex
Forum: Former Cult Members and Affected Families

Reep - Yes I believe the 3rd generation concept grew out of his and his mother's desire for Rick to rule. Anyone associated with Rick and with 3rd generation sure had a lot of power for a while.
Forum: Former Cult Members and Affected Families

I posted an error. Rick was born in 1959. He turned 60 in 2019. Little Lord Fauntleroy.
Forum: Former Cult Members and Affected Families

4Generation - I would like to see your post presented in a more public forum. I would like to see it in Gary's hands. You presented the position of their cover-up and lies so well and eloquently stated the position of "us" the survivors who have been accused of being bitter and who have been battered with the hammer of "forgiveness" since the exposure began. I would
Forum: Former Cult Members and Affected Families

As I clean out files from 2019, sometimes I find notes that may be interesting. For example: Rick Holbrook DOB 4-3-1960 Wife #1 DOB 9-3-1960 Wife #2 DOB 11-19-1964 Wife #3 DOB 8-4-1970 Wife #4 DOB 3-6-81 Wife #5? Anyone's guess
Forum: Former Cult Members and Affected Families

PowerTrip - You are so very welcome here and you have nothing to be ashamed of. ALL of us who were involved for long years wish we had spoken up when we could tell things were wrong. But we must not be ashamed. The fear you describe is one of the ways they held all of us under their control. They had to keep us as prisoners because we knew so many truths about their wrong behavior and decei
Forum: Former Cult Members and Affected Families

Thank you, Melissa. And thank you, Reepicheep. I was around some people a few weeks ago who are still caught up in the religious, convincing deception being produced by former leaders like Hargrave and his minions. I am also exposed to a lot of political information that shows me how people are also still caught up in believing that the current President is a good Christian. And I am really
Forum: Former Cult Members and Affected Families

Did everybody have a moment when you looked back at all the hard work, focus and prayer that you gave toward bringing the Kingdom (or whatever current vital project was going to achieve that) and try to figure out what exactly you were expecting? All that effort, time and money, for what? So weird. And the weirdest part is it went on, and on, and on, and on until it stopped. Like you said C
Forum: Former Cult Members and Affected Families

Relaxing as a sin. What a nasty concept drummed into our minds and conditioning. The hard work now is taking baby steps towards freedom from that life robbing drive to achieve value by always working. I loved your post, Reep. Liam your former and current posts are always great. ;-)
Forum: Former Cult Members and Affected Families

Liamthomasusa - I love you too.
Forum: Former Cult Members and Affected Families

"It is time we take back that WHISPER." YES!
Forum: Former Cult Members and Affected Families

Reep - You got some nasty focus that's for sure. By safe, I meant within the people who genuinely post. Not the trolls. There have been many.
Forum: Former Cult Members and Affected Families

Northerngate: The first time anyone ever discussed PTSD with me, it had to do with my father and then the cult. No matter the cause of the trauma, the panic of feeling unsafe is genuine. I don't focus on causes from my family because my dad has been dead since 1995 and we got close before he died and I miss him. But while he was alive, I never stopped hoping I could find a tender moment
Forum: Former Cult Members and Affected Families

I forgot to share one of the primary keys my therapist taught me. In creating a new life after the cult, make "Self Care" your top priority. Even taking a small step and doing something consistently that is caring for yourself (preparing healthy meals, bathing with a lovely new soap, etc.) starts the process of removing the conditioning of the negative life under cult control. I
Forum: Former Cult Members and Affected Families

OMG. I forgot the most important thing from my therapist. It all starts with making your priority over everything else, "SELF CARE." When you give all control over your life to someone (a cult), you put yourself on the back burner so entirely that you don't know where to start. Keep self-care as your priority and steps a few times a week and build from there.
Forum: Former Cult Members and Affected Families

kBOY - Your friend's therapy is a good one. My law practice was also family law and that is part of the reason when I left the law practice, I left in a big way. The clients are going thru very dismal and emotional transitions and it's an unhappy place. I was very lucky in that I made some lifelong friends who continue to be friends on our journeys in life. But I wouldn't subje
Forum: Former Cult Members and Affected Families

I learned something beneficial from my therapist yesterday. We went back over the notes of my very first meeting with her. At that time, I was nervous that I would not be able to stay in therapy long enough to achieve the result I was looking for, which was to dig deeply into 40 years of conditioning by a destructive cult. At our first meeting, she said, no to my idea of therapy. We don
Forum: Former Cult Members and Affected Families

Larry - Thank you for your post and I heartily agree. In fact, I have been experiencing a restoration of relationships all during this past year and the level seems to be amped up right now. People I wanted to find and have even tried really hard to find and could not, have somehow contacted me and it continues to be very amazing. We are living in an exciting time as we leave our oppressive
Forum: Former Cult Members and Affected Families

JesusJesusJesus - I almost fell off my chair when I read what you wrote about G&M's dishwasher! hahahahaha Good one!
Forum: Former Cult Members and Affected Families

Well, definitely the apt JRS had wouldn't have been fabulous enough for G&M. And I just confirmed with a former Shiloh-ite that the balcony was built when remodel work was done for G&M. My other question was - an elevator? They installed an elevator for one floor of stairs? Wonder how much that cost. Rick wasn't the only one who threw money away on follies of his own design
Forum: Former Cult Members and Affected Families

I don't remember JRS's apartment having a balcony. Was one added later for G&M for just that purpose, to wave at the throngs without having to get dirty rubbing elbows?
Forum: Former Cult Members and Affected Families

Reepicheep - What you said about JRS's blood family is so true. They knew. They experienced the change in him. I was just wondering today -- when JRS had the meeting with the Lord after he had been kicked out of both the 4-Square and Assemblies and I think it was just before he started South Gate, and the Lord was going to kill him for his withdrawal. Was his withdrawal tied into his w
Forum: Former Cult Members and Affected Families

KBoy - Yes, amen. My remark about the kingdom being stopped in its tracks was said as a wiseass remark.
Forum: Former Cult Members and Affected Families

Reep - I think you're right that it was 1978. Maybe it stopped the kingdom in its tracks for him to choose a life with Marilyn. It stopped a lot of fulfillment in its tracks. I think we can all attest to that. I agree that after that JRS never seemed the same. Drinking constantly. The Kling house was interesting as a home for John & Marilyn after they were together. John had
Forum: Former Cult Members and Affected Families

Reep and others considering the failure of the JRS's kingdom to arrive on time. Martha left JRS on September 25, 1979 - or was it 1978. Because JRS was with a woman having an extramarital relationship when he saw the future, maybe Martha leaving and him winning the prize of Marilyn (his concurrent extramarital affair) in his life 24/7 was all the kingdom he needed. Oh, wait. Having Mari
Forum: Former Cult Members and Affected Families

Northerngate and Chachakitty - They held us against our will through mind control that eliminated our ability to determine our own will or desires. It was a prison of the multi-realm type, holding us by psychic, spiritual, emotional, and psychological means. They also used different playbooks for different people. If your landlord was someone who had wealth, then he or she was managed by th
Forum: Former Cult Members and Affected Families

They are renting a church facility in the Bulltown strip mall for services. Announcements have said they would have services in a meeting room at a business address in Kalona (Chamber of Commerce?) until they get the carpet installed in the new location. Someone said the big focus is on having things in North Liberty, Iowa. And that Craig and Phyllis Haworth are moving there. Gary and Bru
Forum: Former Cult Members and Affected Families

Lael - One of the "stopovers" on the road to healing is anger. I wish I hadn't remained in the angry mode as long or as often as I did. But I am not sure I would have said anything different. I would have felt differently and probably spoke more softly but the truth is the truth. Please don't compare yourself to Gary Hargrave. He is continuing on his road of wreckage
Forum: Former Cult Members and Affected Families

Lael (Chachakitty) - I am so thankful that you are posting on the Forum. We need to learn from you and hear what you have to say about your transition out of abuse. If you didn't read the FaceBook posts after Shalom posted the bombshell, Lael (Chachakitty - great name) was the student at Shiloh that was beaten with a paddle for an endless amount of time by Bob Raba and Scott McDonald be
Forum: Former Cult Members and Affected Families

Changedagain - Perhaps #AnotherNewDay #NewVictimPool Thank you, Typer. I remember JRS trying to get Wayne married off. He did the same thing with others who were homosexual, like Tony Flores (who was a serial rapist/molester.) He did this with Mike Wood of the Colorado church, who wasn't homosexual but was known to be a serial pedophile/rapist until his death by suicide. Thank you,
Forum: Former Cult Members and Affected Families