It’s not necessary, nor is it relevant that you believe me. What matters is that we agree that children should be protected. That only happens with accountability, transparency, and care. The rest: acknowledgment, apology, and reconciliation, is between the fellowship and those who were harmed. If that doesn’t include you, there’s no need for you to insert yourself. I’ve said what I came h
Forum: Destructive Churches

It’s now been six months since I spoke here about the abuse and coverup at KCF. In that time, the response has been the same as survivors always faced: silence. That silence is not neutral. Silence is an action. It protects institutions, not people. It tells survivors, once again, that their pain is inconvenient, and that comfort matters more than truth. Those who continue to attend or defe
Forum: Destructive Churches

To those reading quietly, this is for you. You may have noticed how quickly conversations shift here - from speaking about harm, to being interrogated or pathologised for speaking at all. That’s not random. That’s what happens in systems where abuse is protected - focus is redirected, silence is rewarded, and whistleblowers are made to defend themselves instead of being listened to. I’ve
Forum: Destructive Churches

This is how gaslighting operates in religious spaces: someone says, “There was abuse,” and someone else replies, “But I had a nice time.” This is a deflection. A shield. It protects institutions and egos, not people. What’s striking is that this response comes from someone who’s spoken elsewhere about the harm and deception they endured in their own church. You’d think that experience might h
Forum: Destructive Churches

This past weekend brought yet another stark reminder that those who have been abused live with it every single day. Abuse isn’t something you “move on” from easily - it leaves a mark that shapes the rest of your life. Tragically, those lives are often cut short. Virginia Giuffre, who fought so hard to be heard, recently took her own life after years of living with the consequences of abuse and
Forum: Destructive Churches

Justin Welby’s recent comments offer a stark but important contrast — and a reminder that it is possible for church leaders to speak plainly about abuse. (Link here for those who want to read). Something Welby said also highlights one of the more insidious abuses perpetrated at KCF. "I have never, ever said to a survivor, ‘you must forgive’, because that is their sovereign, absolute indiv
Forum: Destructive Churches

It’s been a month since I first spoke up here about the sexual abuse of children at this church and the cover-up that followed. In that time, there has been no response. I can’t say I’m surprised. Silence is familiar. It’s what survivors faced when they tried to speak out. It’s what the leadership relied on to protect themselves instead of protecting the vulnerable. And it seems it’s still wha
Forum: Destructive Churches

Does anyone else find it strange that when a serious issue like the covering up of child abuse comes up, it gets… covered up here too? Ignored? Wasn’t this forum set up to warn people about the abuses of this church, support those who’ve been harmed, and challenge the institution itself? If your priority is theological debate, there are plenty of other places for that. But if this forum is bec
Forum: Destructive Churches

I see that this post has had just under a thousand views in the last week and yet there’s been no response. I have to say the silence is deafening. This is not just gossip or some petty grievance. This is about the sexual abuse of children and the church’s decision to cover it up rather than protect the vulnerable. It’s about the ongoing trauma suffered by survivors who were blamed, shamed, an
Forum: Destructive Churches

Sexual abuse of children happened at this church. Much like the Church of England’s scandals, the leadership handled it “in house” and then covered it up. There has never been an admission of wrongdoing, no accountability for those who enabled or concealed these crimes, and no apology to the survivors who were blamed, shamed, and cast aside. The church continues to dismiss those who speak out
Forum: Destructive Churches