For me there is practically nobody that seems able or willing to relate to cult experiences out in the real world, although who knows, that may change I suppose. I've just never had that anyway, for whatever it's worth.

But even just sharing experiences and/or emotional reactions to cult-life can be a huge benefit. From what I've seen even typing a few words on a computer screen and getting some kind of intelligent, reasonable, kind, or even pointedly insightful response from another human being can be a great start to a healthier view of traumatic experiences, or even perhaps the traumatic experience of having neurons starting to function in an atmosphere that is not oppressive and controlling.

More than once I've heard people share that even though they've been reading an online message board for a long time, once they started to share and exchange with folks they were surprised at the emotional intensity even a brief exchange could bring up. Venting, ranting, mourning, and even cussing are things that I have seen from folks who started posting on a cult message board. And for the most part once the brief intense periods were over they were thankful that they started exchanging thoughts and feelings with other cult survivors.

But I enjoy hearing how people have been helped by therapy. For me that represents a good change in attitude because my former cult promoted a culture of prejudice against all types of therapy and the practitioners thereof. (Now it's obvious that was a cruel and self-serving ploy on their part.)

My husband and I facilitate a former cult member's support group. Last Saturday we had eighteen people. Your are so right about "saying it" - former cult members need an opportunity and venue to process their experience.

Our group was very anti-therapy and yeah, it is self-serving on their part. After we left the cult, my husband earned his masters degree in counseling and now is able to counsel folks who have experienced cultic or spiritual abuse.

My husband and I facilitate a support group for former members of cults. Last Saturday there were eighteen people in the group. Ex-cultists need the opportunity and a venue to process their experience. Support groups and forums, such as this one, provide that venue.

Our cult was also very "anti-therapy" and yes, it is a self-serving ploy. After we left, my husband earned his masters in counseling. He has a "day job," but offers counseling in the evenings and on weekends to individuals who are recovering from cultic or spiritual abuse.

That sounds like some very good things are happening there Wendy!

It also sounds like a huge responsibility to do your best to keep things going in a good directions for folks. Eighteen people is a lot of interaction and a lot of individuals after all.

I certainly wish you, your hubby, and your eighteen or so folks all the best.

Thanks! This was the largest group we have had since we started over two years ago. If it keeps growing we will have to split up so that more people will have the opportunity to process.

If you are in the Dallas area, feel free to contact me for more info.

Thanks Wendy!

Unfortunately I'm on the other side of the country, but am in the central time zone at least.

But if and when it may happen I will remember to let you know. :)

In my former cult they have spent considerable time insuring folks DO NOT discuss their experiences anywhere or with anybody!

And within different cliques within the old group one thing is fairly constant, people who talk are defective and consorting with them is out of the question.

I've seen judgmental youngsters who are led to believe there is no point. I've been insulted by my peers. I've been told to, "NEVER CALL US AGAIN!" I've seen pseudo-spirituality that seems very smug, as long as the one holding this view can somehow salve their conscience as to all the lies they speak.

It seems to me that two-things are diametrically opposed:

#1. A cults need to silence their victim by any means.

and

#2. A cult victim's need to talk about it in order to help them process their experience in a safe environment.


The cult apologists [CULT APOLOGIST, a new phrase for me thanks to the resources here. :) ]that I've been up against were as cruel to victims as they could be and still get away with it.......buggers........and they were fairly good at getting on administrators' good sides in order to acomplish their goals (SILENCING THE VICTIMS).