I thought people might like to talk about the books that they are reading or have read in the past that helped them in the process of cult recovery.

Not everyone lives in a place where there are 'exit counselors' available who really understand the process of coming out of a cult. At least that has been true in my case.

I think possibly many people, like myself have had to sort through a lot by themselves and that books play a key role in that.

Right now I am reading 'Them and Us: Cult Thinking and the Terrorist Threat' by Arthur Deikman. At first I didn't think of reading it because I'm not that interested in learning about terrorists right now. I know, I know, I'm still so self involved trying to sort out the mess in my life :)

But in fact, it's a fascinating book that deals with the experience of one couple in particular who were in a cult called 'Life Force'. Dr. Deikman, who is a licensed therapist, talks about the ways that cults meet wish fulfillment fantasies of individuals, such as to have a 'perfect parent' who will offer unconditional love, protection and support.

Then it goes on to discuss how 'cult thinking' (things like 'compliance with the group' and 'devaluing the outsider') is prevalent in many areas of our everyday lives, and eventually goes on to discusss the terrorism aspect.

If anyone else has read this book I'd love to hear what they thought about it. Or otherwise perhaps people could share a different book that really helped them through the process of getting out of their cult and recovery after the fact?

Rebirthing got me out of the cult. "Parental disapproval" that is targeted in rebirthing helped a great deal.
BTW - REAL rebirthing that is about breathing....not the Colorado BS..

"Cults among us" helped me figure out that the anxiety I have in making simple descisions is normal. It also helped me to nail down a theory I had that I have been movinf from one cult to another with my mom since I was 5 years old. I started in a meditation cult. It made me feel more secure about the odd things my brain does, like have panic attacks during biofeedback and relaxation classes. It really gave me hope in learning that certain things were programed and can be relearned and other things are natural consequences of what I've been through.

"The emotionally abused woman" talks about abusive individuals but the tactics of abuse and emotional blackmail are used by cults as well. They are spelled out step by step and how to avoid the abuse in the future.

Stephen Cope's book, "Yoga and the Search for the True Self." Cope writes about his experiences in the Kripalu Center in Massachusetts, with Yogi Amrit Desai. My group was, in many ways different than Kripalu, but there were still many things I could relate to in Cope's book. Like Deikman, Cope writes about how people can become involved with a charismatic leader and his/her group because they feel adrift and unconnected. You can long for family, and the leader can feel, at first, as if they are the all-wise and loving parent you never had, and the group can feel like the brothers, sisters and friends you've longed for. These longings can really keep you from seeing the leader and the group as they are, for quite some time.

This book really helped me understand how I got drawn into the group I was in -- as well as how I eventually became disillusioned with it, as well as giving me hope that I could do well after leaving.

"Controlling People," by Patricia Evans also helped me. When I read it, I saw how, in my family, my role had always been to take care of others, regardless of my own needs. No surprise, as an adult I was very drawn to this group in which I was expected to play a similar role.

Sweetface, - I just finished reading 'Enlightenment Blues' by Andre Van der Braak about his years as a disciple of Andrew Cohen. At one point Andre was ordered by Andrew Cohen to do 100 Re-birthing sessions over (I'm not sure how long,) maybe about six months!

He described it as 'hyperventilating' for 45 minutes at a time and that the increased oxygen causes all kinds of emotions to surface. So it was actually used on him while he was still in his cult group.

too much - Do you mean Cults in Our Midst? by Margaret Singer, or is that a different book you read?

tsukimoto - We had such similar experiences, I think I will try and get the Stephen Cope book. Have you read 'Enlightenment Blues'? It's quite an easy read and also very interesting for me. Maybe you would like it too.

You know the strange thing, tsukimoto? I was not aware of feeling 'adrift and unconected' at the time I joined my group. It is only now looking back that I see I really was! I always thought I was so independent and strong. I did not connect the feeling of 'coming home' and the sense of peace and surrender that I initially felt with any desire on my part to forget my concerns about establishing an adult life for myself.

I thought I was embracing my spiritual responsibility when I was actually to some extent trying to escape my adult responsibilites in the real world. Wow. Realizing this is pretty humbling.

Regarding doing well after leaving, as you know from other posts, I've had some trouble with that and it is still hard for me at times. There are some good quotes from Enlightenment Blues you might like and might help others too. I will post them here later.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 07/26/2008 03:40AM by solea13.

Sorry, You're right - "Cults in Our Midst" is what I was trying to say. I keep rereading parts of it.

The most helpful book for me and others who left my abusive church was "Twisted Scriptures, a Path to Freedom from Abusive Churches" by Mary Alice Chrnalogar. At the end of each chapter is a checklist where you can evaluate your group based on the topics read. It was very sobering and frightening to see how many traits my former "church" displayed.

Hi all. Well to be honest. In one way there was a college text book I read about the Media or Communications. Called "Makind Sense of Media", Ibeleive. And it helped me in some ways with cults it may have also helped with just common every day things, really though it helped me with cults though.
And also "Your Boy" and "Your Girl" by Vicki Courtney. Thease books deal with alot of modern society and children adn young teens. Also though it talks alot about you the individual stnding your grounds and not being influenced. And the real world society that's not often talked about, about the groups that approach people at colelges, high schools etc. Parents who let their kids have mor adult freedoms than necessary and similar things, under the guise of being "good people". Thease things did help me. And I would reccomend them for you all.

Murakami's book 'Underground. The Tokio gas attack and the japanese psyche'.
The first part of the book is interviews with people who suffered the attack, the second part interviews with cultmembers and ex-cultmembers.
The people who manifectured the sarin themselves and later released it were all recruted from the prestigieus Tokio university. They were honor students with brilliant carreers before them. It shows that people don't have to be needy to get sucked in a cult, that the most brilliant analytical mind can get manipulated as long as it happens graduelly and under false pretences.

''Healing the Shame that Bind you'' by Bradshaw. Very light and easy reading. It gets into the role we might have played in our family and how that shaped us for society. It helped me see how the brainwashing that my own mother did to me weakened my defenses and made me more susceptible to cult leaders.
The Bible. My cult leaders used bible quotes in a ridiculous and absolutely perverted way. I mean that seriously. They did absolutely perverted things and quoted the Bible. So reading it for myself helped me to see that they twisted every word...not just some things..every thing. They twisted every word.