Hello everyone,

I have recently walked away from years of indoctrination under the Samael Aun Weor phenomenon. I have wasted almost a decade of my life under this garbage and now I need to heal. I won't name a specific group or give out details because I wish to remain anonymous, but I want talk about as much as I can without revealing a lot. I have been following the threads here for a while and only now have I found the courage to even sign up for this board.

One of the greatest things that is bothering me right now after having abruptly left this body of indoctrination is that they persuaded me to abandon really good friends that I had known since early childhood. I treated all of them like dirt and now I feel that because a certain (and long) amount of time has passed, the damage can never be undone. I am thinking about seeing a mental health professional to cope with some of the anguish I am feeling. Thankfully my former instructors were never able to fully break the bonds I have with my family. I now talk about it with my closest family members on a regular basis and it helps. But now I need to speak with others who have gone through this to just work this poison out of my system.

The way this poison works is that it uses reasoning, the very thing they profess to hate, to get to you and turn you into a non-thinking slave after you use that reasoning to jump to some very illogical conclusions, if that makes any sense to any of you that have gotten away from this.

As part of my own self-prescribed psychotherapy, I have been spending as much of my spare time as possible debunking Victor Manuel Gomez Rodriguez's works and lectures and keeping it in a folder in my computer. I don't have too much right now, but I hope to build it up more and more as I keep researching. I'll share what I have as soon as I can, but right now I'm a little too busy to post what I have. I'll aim for posting what I have within a couple of weeks. Right now I just hope I can get your support, because I feel alone right now.

Regards,

The Lone Flame of Eternity

Hi Lone Flame,
you are not alone,try looking at <la gnosis develada> about the sect of SAW and translate the page.His plagiarism is a disgrace.Have a look at the gnostic laughter therapy page, very helpful. The English speaking world needs lots of warning so this cult makes no further advance in Europe,USA etc.
I was also too many years as missionary,instructor and priest until I started to investigate.There are so many corruptions I cannot begin to mention now. Good luck with your work and recovery.

Hi Lone Flame, I was in two groups, E.Baron's CEG in the 90's and the IGCU of Lakhsmi from 2004 until this year.Had to do some therapy work with a Buddhist 'core process psychotherapist', it helped a lot.And also very effective was homeopathy.Its not impossible to get this junk out of the system is the good news. Also there are real spiritual paths, not the pseudo mish mash Sam was presenting.I think he was out of his mind after spending too much time in the jungle drinking yaje with the natives.
Where are you based, I am in the UK.
All the best, Wayne.

Hi clearlight,

I am situated here in the States. Without revealing too much detail about the last group I was in, it was one of them that said adultery was necessary to achieve the "final liberation." For nearly a decade I went from one group to the next, trying to fit in. Finally, I got to my final group and I heard them talk about adultery being necessary, and I said "Whoa! Hold it! I thought repenting was about not committing terrible things ever again!" I also started reading things from outside sources again, and then it all just started to fall apart in modern gnosticism for me, if it can be called that.

I won't specify my age, but fortunately I am still young enough to turn it all around and start a career (I have re-enrolled in my university studies). I was taken advantage of at a vulnerable part of my life; but no more. The true me will shine through with no inhibitions from Samael's doctrine.

My family is happy that I left of my own will. But now I have to live with the ugly fact that I abandoned and alienated some of my best friends overnight: I totally cut them off without ever telling them why or explaining anything to them. This is why I am seeking psychological counseling, I desperately need to know how to handle the guilt and remorse. I am afraid my former friends wouldn't understand how this evil cult poisoned my reasoning and almost destroyed my life.

If anyone has any advice (even if you weren't involved in this group) please help me out!

After I have taken all my final exams next week I will talk about my findings. It is very necessary to keep this doctrine from invading the English-speaking world.

Regards,

The Lone Flame of Eternity

Dear Lone Flame:

You are very fortunate that you trusted what you knew to be true and removed yourself from that group while still young enough to resume your career path.

It is a very powerful and identity disruptive matter when a leader plays chess with the marriages and friendships within a group. It may be that some leaders live vicariously by controlling the sexual expression and relationship bonds of members--like a child playing with toys. In the guise of spiritual evolution, you are being used to entertain the leader, and that means being used as an object.

Dunno if this will be of any help, but there's a book about Balsamo Cagliostro, an 18th century magician/entrepreneur/healer that you might find interesting.

The book is entitled The Last Alchemist: Count Cagliostro Master of Magic in the Age of Reason by Ian Mccalman

[www.google.com]

Cagliostro pursued the 18th century's equivalent of esoteric studies and taught some of his hand picked disciples that transgressing normal standards was necessary to advance on the path. He used his charm and his prior training as a monastic to persuade his young and beautiful wife to seduce other men and thus bring them into her husband's schemes.

It can sometimes help to find out that versions of this have been circulating for hundreds of years.