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rattyboy
Btw, regarding parades, when the one parade I was in was over and we were on the bus, our "cho" or whatever he was as a leader was pumping his arms and his voice was nearly gone from screaming in delight over our victory. He reached toward me, grabbed my shoulders and shook me while looking wildly into my eyes. I wanted to give the right response and react way big beyond my usual introspective nature and gave him a great big "Yeah!" right back, but he froze and looked in my eyes with horror (I know, my favourite word) and furrowed brow as if I were devoid of genuine response, gakkai fever, Buddha nature what have you, and the parade had zero effect on me. ( picture Woody Allen saying " I thought it was pretty decent") I basically harshed his buzz. I took reactions like that as a sign that the diehard members were really perceptive at picking up high life condition or the lack of it. It almost chills me now thinking of it. I mean like the programming working on me again, right now sort of way. Life Condition. I hated those frog-faced slight looks of disapproval from those stooges.

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rattyboy
Btw, regarding parades, when the one parade I was in was over and we were on the bus, our "cho" or whatever he was as a leader was pumping his arms and his voice was nearly gone from screaming in delight over our victory. He reached toward me, grabbed my shoulders and shook me while looking wildly into my eyes. I wanted to give the right response and react way big beyond my usual introspective nature and gave him a great big "Yeah!" right back, but he froze and looked in my eyes with horror (I know, my favourite word) and furrowed brow as if I were devoid of genuine response, gakkai fever, Buddha nature what have you, and the parade had zero effect on me. ( picture Woody Allen saying " I thought it was pretty decent") I basically harshed his buzz. I took reactions like that as a sign that the diehard members were really perceptive at picking up high life condition or the lack of it. It almost chills me now thinking of it. I mean like the programming working on me again, right now sort of way. Life Condition. I hated those frog-faced slight looks of disapproval from those stooges.

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dragon14
I was in Boston in the late 80s, and as a YMD then, I took a lot of trips to Flushing Meadow in Queens to participate in these same kinds of activities. One time, George Williams made an appearance while we were sweltering in the sun. To this day, the "Ay Ay Oh" stuff also makes the hair stand up on the back of my neck. In a five minute "guidance and encouragement", we'd do that cheer about 15 times, and follow it up with the ever-contrived and practiced-in-advance "let's have a picture with Rijicho!". Those photo ops - argh! - spontaneous my a**! Unlike some contributors who have said they value the time they spent in the SGI even though they're no longer members, I still feel regret at the valuable time I wasted on these cultish activities.

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dragon14
I also recall a time when someone told me (a secondhand account) about Richard Sasaki (the then YMD chief) coming to New York and in some "guidance" telling the YMD that they were "pussies" for not doing more daimoku. It's right in line with what you reference: problems are solved by doing more shakubuku and daimoku, even if the rest of your life suffers from neglect.

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That "Kansai Fighting Spirit", with your diapers full, made you a better member. I kid you not. I'm 100% serious. We were told to strive for that same kind of "spirit." The implication was very clear - that if called upon, it would be a honor to sh** our pants for sensei.

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Hitch
That constant feeling of "doom" is classic cult psychological manipulation. It's also mentioned in the video I posted early "How Cults Work" (along with all the stupid activities - i.e., marching/parades - and a very humorous song for the leader - i.e., forever sensei). You're supposed to be afraid because your thoughts have been reformed (i.e., you're brainwashed, as were we all at some point).

As per wakkata's post, that's how it all starts. Confirmation bias, cherry picking the evidence to support what you want to believe, nothing more. Did you see my post earlier about the lady who wasn't actually chanting yet the members told her it was because she was? Even if she had told them she really wasn't chanting, they still would have come up with something else, like "well, it's because you've met the gohonzon/true law. You're so fortunate to even obtain such a benefit even before you start chanting!" Trust me, they can always come up with something. It's ridiculous at times.

I've grown up in the practice and have heard, literally, hundreds, if not thousands, of "experiences." There was never one, not a single one, that I remember that could not be explained as confirmation bias. 99+% of them were the usual silly things. Even the <1% that wasn't asinine, were vague and only appear as "miraculous" due to ignorance (of the personal, scientific or statistical variety). I've always laughed at Ikeda's making a big deal about him overcoming tuberculosis in his novel (HR). It's a perfect example of such ignorance. I can't count the number of times I've sat in gakkai meetings listening to members' experiences and had to suppress my desire to roll my eyes at what they found as an "incredible benefit."

The confirmation bias works in both directions, positive and negative. This is in the negative direction. It's also an entirely different fallacy that has a name - "argumentum in terrorem" (an argument to terror/an appeal to fear) [en.wikipedia.org]. This kind of stuff is the basic ham & cheese of cult/religious psychological manipulation and delusional thinking. Know what is and recognize it for what it is. There is nothing mystical about it, except only for those who want it to be (or in the case of the cult, need it to be, to keep control).

It's always liberating to dump all the emotional and psychological baggage that one is carrying around. All of this baggage was placed there, without your knowledge, by the cult, too. They're not going to come and clean up after themselves, because they don't want it cleaned up. It's up to you to do it yourself. I personally don't recommend (in the words of anticult) "jumping from frying pan to frying pan and straight to the fire" by joining another cult/religion, but that's just me. As I've also said before, we are all different and have different needs. Best wishes to you. Keep doubting and thinking for yourself, it's healthy and should be done by everyone. Anyone who tells you otherwise is either ignorant and/or manipulating you.

Once you're completely free, on the other side, you'll look back in amazement as to how you ever fell for any of the nonsense. I do, now. It's also good for a good laugh for me now, too. If I hadn't actually lived it, I'd never believe that such ridiculous stuff was even possible in real life. Finding this mb, I realized I wasn't the only one.

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Nichijew

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rattyboy
Btw, regarding parades, when the one parade I was in was over and we were on the bus, our "cho" or whatever he was as a leader was pumping his arms and his voice was nearly gone from screaming in delight over our victory. He reached toward me, grabbed my shoulders and shook me while looking wildly into my eyes. I wanted to give the right response and react way big beyond my usual introspective nature and gave him a great big "Yeah!" right back, but he froze and looked in my eyes with horror (I know, my favourite word) and furrowed brow as if I were devoid of genuine response, gakkai fever, Buddha nature what have you, and the parade had zero effect on me. ( picture Woody Allen saying " I thought it was pretty decent") I basically harshed his buzz. I took reactions like that as a sign that the diehard members were really perceptive at picking up high life condition or the lack of it. It almost chills me now thinking of it. I mean like the programming working on me again, right now sort of way. Life Condition. I hated those frog-faced slight looks of disapproval from those stooges.

Ya mon! If Shakyamuni Buddha or Nichiren Daishonin were in the Gakkai, they would be reprimanded for being thoughtful, reserved, and serious.

Disgusted Nichijew

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Wakatta 1
I recall in my very early days with the SokaGakkai in Japan at age 20, I was having a very rough time of it (away from home, feeling isolated, coping with "adult" grade problems). The individual that was most responsible for getting me to accept a Gohonzon and I spoke one day when I was really down, and he said "you are being punished by the Gohonzon because you aren't chanting enough". He went on to point out that my life force was draining away and the only way I could get it back was to chant (along with a lot of equivocations about how it was a great blessing because I was changing "poison into elixir", etc. etc.). It was all so easy-peasy, just chant!

At that moment I think is when the "hook" was set, and it wouldn't be for years until I re-examined that thought process. Life has its ups and downs, whether you are "buddhist", buddhist, christian or a member of the Church of Bob. There are a lot of philosophical stretches you can make, but the whole "Divine Punishment" thing is probably the longest and most insidious.

At the time, the next questions were "what do I do" and what was dispensed back was that it was all "cause and effect" (i.e. you might have some influence if you knew what the cause was) and the only way to "solve" the problem is to open-endedly throw yourself into Gakkai (cult) activities. That is where the fanaticism comes from, it is totally open ended, and there is no way of knowing whether it would make things any better.

At the District meetings you now are hungry for examples of how it has really worked out, That is when you take a deep drink of the "kool aid" and start listening to other people's opinions (and of course "experiences" in which people, (singled out and under social pressure), stretch very hard to identify how their life has been "improved" by the practice. (In my many years of Gakkai, NSA practice I never heard one person say "I chanted and chanted and chanted and nothing happened", instead it was "I chanted and *holy smokes* I found a 5 dollar bill" instead.) In other words, cause and effect goes out the window and it becomes a "mystic reward" (Magical!) Essentially side-tracking things into expectations of some sort of "miraculous" event to occur instead. Implications being that if YOU don't see miracles happening in your life, it is because you don't chant hard enough and you must redouble your efforts, donate more money, join Kotekitai, do toban, carry flags in parades, do Pac-Man Shakubuku, revere sensei, etc. etc.) Surely it couldn't be the practice that is wrong....

Consider the case of someone with a life-threatening disease and the doctor tells them they can cure themselved "if only" they knew what cause would do it - and then they provide them with a list of a dozen, life-long tasks to choose from. Essentially, under the guise of providing direction and wisdom, you are instead given a shot of "cult" indoctrination with the goal of making you into a robot for that cause.

So that sense of "Impending DOOM" is pervasive in the group's guidance, literature, experiences and is the unspoken "boogieman" of the practice. (Possibly one of their trademarks I daresay) I recall reading guidance to the effect of "when you are worrying it is your life sensing that bad karma is appearing, and to avoid it you must do gongyo and chant tirelessly until that "impending doom feeling" goes away which will mean you've changed the karma. (And by the way, you sadly discover that the sense of impending doom never goes away, no matter how many times during the night you get up and look under the bed)

Wakatta1

"Better out than in I always say" -- Shrek