Followers of Christ Church, CULT????
Posted by:
Mustang Sally
()
Date: March 11, 2004 07:41PM
Hi my name is Jonni, and I have just recently joined this Forum.
My reason for doing so has to do with my husband & his family. He was raised here in Southern Idaho in what I would consider "Strange" Cult like circumstances.
He was born at home, actually at his grandmothers house as was his 5 brothers and sisters. His all of the people on his Mothers side of the family were members of the Followers of Christ Church. None of them had ever been to a doctor in their life, and they all believed that if one got ill, that the elders of the church would heal them, or God's will be done. I thought this was very strange when I came into this family, and in fact his siblings did not want him to marry me, because I am a nurse. Oh and also because I was raised Catholic(another cult another time).
Anyway, after I was married into this family I found things were very strange. The first thing was the day that we were married my husband had to produce a birth certificate. He produced one, but when I looked at it I noticed that it had not been recorded until 1978 when he was 9 years old. I never mentioned it, but it was strange to me since my birth certificate was recorded 7 days after my birth. After we were married things all began to come clear, but at the same time began to really puzzle me. No one in his family had ever seen a doctor, and even though I knew that his mother died when he was only 3 years old, I had no clue what circumstances she had died in. Apparently she was suffering from what they now say had to have been breast cancer, and that she died in the same bed that she had been born in and had had all of her childern in. I was then shown pictures of this apparent wound on her chest. It was the worst thing that I had ever seen. Her left breast was completely gone, it had been eaten away, and she had what looked like gang green in her chest cavity. Only half of her right breast was still intact, and there was a lot of drainage from the site. You could see her ribs and breast bone in the picture. I asked why she had not been taken to a doctor, no human being should have been left to suffer such a loss of tissue. Even in 1972 there were treatments that could have prolonged her life, or made her quality of life better. What I was told next shocked me!
I was told my by Sister in Law that they did not believe in that type of thing, and that they thought what I did as an occupation was wrong and immoral. I was very puzzled by this. She then told me that they did not believe in any doctors, hospitals, etc. That it was their belief in this Followers of Christ Church that God's will be done. Oh my God, I could not believe this. So it became clear to me that they had all sat around while the Elders of the church prayed for my Mother in Law and did nothing to help her, nothing to ease her pain. She told me that her Mother would not even take an asprin when a family member that was excommunicated from the church offered her one. That it was God's will that she die this way, and that she had to be pure of heart to go to heaven.
So my Mother in Law left her three year old son, and died an horrid death to save her soul. That sounds a bit selfish to me. Now after all of these years of dealing with this family, and still not being able to live by the rules, a fact that has gotten my husband in trouble with the elders several times, I am at a desperate place. Since I will not conform to the way of life that I have married into my husband has a choice. Since I can not see the light, I am not worthy, so he has been told to make a choice. The Elders have told him to either get rid of me, or be excommunticated from the church in which he would never be able to be around his family again. I do believe that he told me in an argument about it that one of the Elders thanked God that we had not yet had children, because I was unworthy, and was not submissive, so I would not be a good mother to any child.
How can I keep my marriage intact with my husband in this cult. What should I do? I will not comform to their ways, I will not quit my job as a nurse like they want, but on the other hand I do not want to get divorced, and I do not want to lose my husband. Am I being unreasonable? It is trudition in his family, but he was the one that married me. He was the one that kept it a secret. Should I confront the Elders of the Church? I am at a standstill here, and any advice that you could give me would be a blessing.
Thanks for any help you may give to me.
Mustang Sally
Followers of Christ Church, CULT????
Posted by:
Harriet
()
Date: March 22, 2004 07:42AM
Dear Mustang Sally,
This is such a compelling story! I am surprised no one has answered on the forum, but perhaps because it is such a difficult situation, it is hard to know what to say.
As a nurse, it must be especially difficult for you to deal with people who would ignore human suffering, deny available medical treatment, allow people to suffer AND claim that all of this is God's will.
You mentioned that your husband kept his family's beliefs secret from you before your marriage. To me this seems very unfair and dishonest. Is he willing to face excommunication to stay with you or not? I would encourage you to never join his church or suscribe to his family's bizarre beliefs. Basically it is his decision whether to face ex-communication or not. I wonder if his deception before your marriage is grounds for annulment? ( I know very little about annulment, just an idea)
I have dealt with a simlar situation in which my husband chose a cult over me. Although I was raised not to believe in divorce, except in extreme circumstances, we ended up divorcing because I had to protect our child from the cult influence and he refused to leave the cult.
I encourage you to stand your ground, because you are the sane one in the situation.
Harriet
This is such a compelling story! I am surprised no one has answered on the forum, but perhaps because it is such a difficult situation, it is hard to know what to say.
As a nurse, it must be especially difficult for you to deal with people who would ignore human suffering, deny available medical treatment, allow people to suffer AND claim that all of this is God's will.
You mentioned that your husband kept his family's beliefs secret from you before your marriage. To me this seems very unfair and dishonest. Is he willing to face excommunication to stay with you or not? I would encourage you to never join his church or suscribe to his family's bizarre beliefs. Basically it is his decision whether to face ex-communication or not. I wonder if his deception before your marriage is grounds for annulment? ( I know very little about annulment, just an idea)
I have dealt with a simlar situation in which my husband chose a cult over me. Although I was raised not to believe in divorce, except in extreme circumstances, we ended up divorcing because I had to protect our child from the cult influence and he refused to leave the cult.
I encourage you to stand your ground, because you are the sane one in the situation.
Harriet
Followers of Christ Church, CULT????
Posted by:
Ramasurvivor
()
Date: April 04, 2004 05:21AM
Jonni my heart goes out to you.
Having lived with the fallout that such a marriage can create (I left such a group) I can appreciate your pain. I remember the time that I experienced severe gastrointestinal pain. I will never know if I passed a kidney stone. I was screaming for help, confessing every minor sins and let out into the open a very secret struggle.
I paid long for that indiscretion and R. C. B / commonly called Brother later used that knowledge to prophesy about my malady.
Your husband has to be something of a black sheep to have even dated an outsider / gentile / non-believer and even more so for you not to have converted prior to the marriage. He does face a very real choice between you and his "sect" and most of the family goes with that. While I can tell you that in practice some will disregard the "papal edict" or the shunning should he choose you, he will find himself cut off from part of his family. If he loves you enough, that may be enough but it will be painful.
Caving in will not resolve the problem. The demands will continue until you at some time either take a stand or accept the abuse. Don't. No man is worth that price of dignity and self worth.
I saw a funny thing happen in my time with the brethren. Advanced Education was forbidden until Rama's children became olde enough to attend college.
The rules in these groups are plastic.
It may be painful, but take your stand now while you can and if it costs you your husband it is better to bear the pain now than the great er pain you will surely bear later.
Having lived with the fallout that such a marriage can create (I left such a group) I can appreciate your pain. I remember the time that I experienced severe gastrointestinal pain. I will never know if I passed a kidney stone. I was screaming for help, confessing every minor sins and let out into the open a very secret struggle.
I paid long for that indiscretion and R. C. B / commonly called Brother later used that knowledge to prophesy about my malady.
Your husband has to be something of a black sheep to have even dated an outsider / gentile / non-believer and even more so for you not to have converted prior to the marriage. He does face a very real choice between you and his "sect" and most of the family goes with that. While I can tell you that in practice some will disregard the "papal edict" or the shunning should he choose you, he will find himself cut off from part of his family. If he loves you enough, that may be enough but it will be painful.
Caving in will not resolve the problem. The demands will continue until you at some time either take a stand or accept the abuse. Don't. No man is worth that price of dignity and self worth.
I saw a funny thing happen in my time with the brethren. Advanced Education was forbidden until Rama's children became olde enough to attend college.
The rules in these groups are plastic.
It may be painful, but take your stand now while you can and if it costs you your husband it is better to bear the pain now than the great er pain you will surely bear later.
Followers of Christ Church, CULT????
Posted by:
Hogan
()
Date: April 30, 2004 02:17AM
Mustang Sally: Please see what I've posted under Cults, Sects, New Religions, forum. This may pertain to the group you describe.
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