Thanks for having the courage to share this, Reveal. The place was and is a monstrosity. Glad you have found the right path for your life...and have separated yourself from this madness.

Thanks for sharing all that Reveal. I don't know about anyone else, but it is therapeutic to hear other people's stories and experiences in TLWF. Just to know that someone else on earth knows what it was like gives me the feeling of not being alone in it. I know other people I have spoken to feel this way.

I feel like my number one suggestion to people who are out there, maybe reading this message board, and feeling alone, is try to reach out to people who have also left the cult, and find a network. The people I am in touch with are part of what I kinda call a support group. We get together, talk about our experience in TLWF, and help each other understand. It is such a specific experience (TLWF) that I feel like you need others to talk to who know what it was like. Find a network, and be a network for other people. I have often thought about how funny it is that we heard that saying "The Kingdom is relationships". And ya know what, I think in some ways that has come true, except, for that "word" to come to pass, people had to take it outside that god forsaken place, and walk it out as people. Relationships are important, and vital to our survival as people.

I could, and have, talked for hours about my experience in TLWF, and probably will do it some day here as well, but I have found the most shocking part of that whole experience happened when I left the cult. I've described to my therapist how I feel like I had a really good set of tools to exist within a cult environment, but I had no toolset to exist out in the real world. Having to think for myself, have my own motivations, discover who I actually am as a person. All of that was expressly forbidden in my cult world. I've had to relearn how people function outside the control of a soul-destroying cult. I feel like in many ways, they tried to destroy the people we were as kids raised in that thing. I am thankful to know that they didn't succeed. They couldn't turn us in to "zeros with the rim rubbed out". The human spirit persevered, and we came out on top.

The greatest liberation I have experienced is the feeling that they have no more control over me. I don't live under their thumb or influence any more. I still know people who are in the church, and I don't hesitate to tell them how I feel any more. I love the shit out of those people, and I won't stand by and be a spectator to the continued abuse.

We're free people. We escaped a cult. Be reminded every day that you did something truly courageous, bold, and powerful in your life, and that was your first step in to a new life. What a great way to enter a new life, with a bold move. We all did that, and that is an amazing thing we should never stop being proud of. Yes, we're cult survivors, and that will always be a part of us. But realize that we've got the opportunity now to make our lives about so much more than that place. Let's feel powerful, people!

Reveal - Thank you so much for speaking out and sharing your very personal story. I too still struggle with PTSD - like an abused dog ducking its head expecting a blow. Or the feeling that suddenly everything is wrong about you and looking around for who is coming after you to tell you how bad you are.

I hope all of us communicating with one another continues to help people come forward with NO shame to tell of their own experiences and to find liberation in knowing that they don't have to continue to keep secrets on behalf of any abusive AND/or unlawful organization.

We are getting free, we are getting better and it will continue to get better for us as we move forward. I know that. I believe that. And I am happy that we can all be witness to it for one another. Yay.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 08/18/2018 09:47AM by Onion.

As many of you know, one of my talents is writing spiritually incisive lyrics to worship songs...with the intent of lifting people up into a higher realm, so they can (hopefully) better understand God's purpose for their lives. Anyway, I just want to share you a song I am presently working on. I don't have the melody as yet, but the lyrics are just flowing. I've already shared what I have with a couple mature believers, whose opinions I trust, and the feedback has been positive. One of them said he hadn't come across anything 'quite like this.' The other said the song will 'have an impact.' Needless to say, I'm elated by the early response. It's given me the courage to share what I have so far:

Song Title: Give it to Kevin

My Job
Is to Give it to Kevin
Give it to Kevin
Give it to Kevin
Yeah!
When Gary gets back from Brazil

Hallelujah....
(30 minutes of worshiping in the spirit)
Word
Offering
Announcements etc.

BRILLIANT!!! Could there be a verse on the leaders of TLW having the job of hiding Rick, hiding Rick, hiding Rick? Perhaps this brilliant song could have many choruses designed around various jobs and individuals.

As an aside, Kevin Hargrave has been one of the most horribly mistreated people to ever have the honor of working for Gary and/or Marilyn. That's another story for another day. Of course, he would deny it but I know it and experienced it.

Love your song Changedagain!

Telemarketer? maybe? maybe not? My boss had a stalker who pretended to be a telemarketer- so I'm not convinced. Add those marketers get area codes from other places.
I say, do Not Trust anyone even it they cry "Lord, Lord" and swear with their hands on the First Principals- I mean bible.

Welcome Reveal. thanks for sharing your feelings. I believe that all of us can feel with you the same things.


it is good to see Onion post.

You know dear ones, we are all human beings who breath in then breath out.

Telemarketer? maybe? maybe not? My boss had a stalker who pretended to be a telemarketer- so I'm not convinced. Add those marketers get area codes from other places.
I say, do Not Trust anyone even it they cry "Lord, Lord" and swear with their hands on the First Principals- I mean bible.

Welcome Reveal. thanks for sharing your feelings. I believe that all of us can feel with you the same things.


it is good to see Onion post.

You know dear ones, we are all human beings who breath in then breath out.

Telemarketer? maybe? maybe not? My boss had a stalker who pretended to be a telemarketer- so I'm not convinced. Add those marketers get area codes from other places.
I say, do Not Trust anyone even it they cry "Lord, Lord" and swear with their hands on the First Principals- I mean bible.

Welcome Reveal. thanks for sharing your feelings. I believe that all of us can feel with you the same things.


it is good to see Onion post.

You know dear ones, we are all human beings who breath in then breath out.

Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------

> As an aside, Kevin Hargrave has been one of the
> most horribly mistreated people to ever have the
> honor of working for Gary and/or Marilyn. That's
> another story for another day. Of course, he
> would deny it but I know it and experienced it.

Interesting. It has to have been near impossible to have any freedom of thought being that close to G & M day after day.

> Love your song Changedagain!
Thanks. I put a lot of effort into it :)

Does anyone remember JRS talking negatively about Hammond organs used in church. Is this why most major churches had a custom Wayne Barton rotating speaker rigged up. Didn’t JRS say the Hammonds sounded too “theatrical” for worship and singing in the spirit?