I have made a discovery about myself that has been a breakthrough for me tonight, and I thought I might share it. I have discovered that I have been mad at John Stevens for thirty years or so because he didn't make arrangements for someone responsible enough to be over the Living Word church after he died. I guess he perhaps he didn't think he would die, I don't know.

Anyway, I feel a lot of freedom tonight. I believe it is good for you when you get to the root of things. It is not good to wallow in bitterness forever. It is also not good for you to repress anger, it is good to let it out. When someone is dead, it is a little difficult to get your anger out at them. It is better to feel the emotion. But then there comes a time when you can forgive someone, it is best to do so.

Well, it's Sunday. Today, my new wife and me are heading out to a church. This makes two Sundays in a row at this one. I don't plan to go to the same one long enough for the people to know my name, so they won't ask me when I miss a Sunday "Chaos, we missed you last week....." then the old pause while the seem to await an explanation as to why I missed. It has been about 29 or 30 years now if I am counting right since I was in the Walk, and I still don't have plans on staying in a church long enough to make friends.

Yesterday, I decided I would forgive John Robert Stevens for his part of leaving the Living Word in the hands of the present crew. I don't think there was any video of JRS turning over the thing to Marilyn. If any of you have seen such a video, tell me, I'd like to know.

Twenty Nine or thirty years, and no matter what church I go to, I still miss driving up to Knoxville, or to one of the other local churches for a regional meeting. I don't know if you all in the other areas of the country had regionals... They were always a blast to me. I really miss the old Walk.

The Old Walk, I call the Walk led by John Stevens the "old Walk." It was a cult to, to a degree. If I were to put a number value on cults, on a level between one and ten, ten being the worst, ten being where they mix up the poison laced cool-aid, I call it "cy-an-aid," I would classify the old Walk on a scale of about a five. Meaning about half and half. Half church, half freak show. I would rate the NEW WALK, on a level of about an eight. They are on the level of the broken homes, maybe a suicide here and there we never hear about because someone is put out that has no people skills, that is too afraid or bitter to even talk with someone out "in the world." A level eight is a cult that just might be on the news at any time.

I think John Stevens had too much confidence in impartation. There is no substitute for the work of the cross. Oh, there is much to say about impartation. But you can't make the second and third and fourth generation instantly walk in what it took the previous generation decades to learn and unlearn. Latter Rain theology might have a few bugs in it in some ways............

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Changed4me

At the time in 1997 when I was told I was not welcome, I was devistated because I felt that 25 years of my life just ended abruptly. Here were human beings whom I had counseled, shepherded, took their children into my home when mom and dad were struggling with their relationship, the list goes on. These people I had loved and prayed for refused to speak to me or answer a phone call or answer a letter..... because they were told to cut it off. I hate the fear these people live under.... the fear of being rejected.... the fear of not belonging to a group.

I left in 1997 as well. My tenure was from 1976 to 1997. I wasn't asked to leave, but the pressure for me to conform to a culture I found increasingly repulsive, became just too much. Fortunately my family agreed with the decision to get the hell out--and the leaders weren't able to divide us.
What was the reason given to you as to why you were no longer welcome, Changed4me?
Anything specific? If you have already answered this, my apologies.

You know, Changed4 and Changedagain, I was just in the Walk for 7 years and I miss that comraderie to this day, and I left back in 1984. I never even met John Robert Stevens, and to this day I wish that I had. I feel that I missed something in my life because of it. I am just now getting a handle on the fact, that I myself was effected much more than I had thought.

You two, and all of you that were either born into the Walk or were in it from your childhood must certainly feel to this day that something is missing in your life.

I believe though that every thing does word for the good for those who love God. There is something good that has happened to you that you were tied up in that, and there is something good that you have left it. I am believing that you all find that which is good in all of this.

" I believe though that every thing does word for the good for those who love God. There is something good that has happened to you that you were tied up in that, and there is something good that you have left it. I am believing that you all find that which is good in all of this."---- WHAT did I say??? Oh, Everything WORKS for the good of those who love God and are call for His purposes......Sorry.

By the way, I went to church today. The pastor didn't mention that he was also a bishop but twice, so that wasn't too bad. I am seeking God for a healing also for myself because having been involved in the Living Word I got so tired of hearing those titles mentioned that it actually sickens me to hear any of them, even though they are in the bible, even though they were in the early church, titles bother me to the point that I cringe, and when they are mentioned, I have noticed that often I just stop hearing what people are saying when they mention titles, even when I know they are not bragging about themselves or someone else. I am polite and all, I listen, but I don't hear.

See how it is? See how much subtle effect things have on me? I am sure that there are also little things that happen like that with all of you. The enemy has planted little snares that trap us because of our past experiences. I am I am believing God that what has been meant for our destruction, God will turn around and it will be for our good.

Years ago I looked up in the concordance, a root word meaning for the word virgin, and to my surprise the definition it gave for that particular word used in that sentence was - - having never been man handled.

Simply, I realized that what many of us experienced was no more than falling into the hands of men, who were just carnal and not really spiritual .

We did not know or understand the difference - yes, God causes all things to work together for good. Today there are many now who have been " changed " who now walk carefully , who have set their hearts , to do no harm. And they will continue to be changed from glory to glory.

It might be beneficial to review some of the statements that have come over the pulpit of major Living Word churches over the years. In every instance, these statements have never been rescinded. The leadership would never do that. So they stand as part of the LW "truth". After all, they're supposed to be "Words from God", right? Here's a partial list:

"The Kingdom of God will come in 1979"

"Shiloh is the Center of the Universe"

"When John died, he took satan down with him"

"If your wife is a bitch, you made her that way"

"Marilyn is John's perfect other half"

"John's biggest mistake (sin) was not opening up to Marilyn"

"If you even *think* about talking to Mr. XYZ, you should take your own hands, put them on your neck and choke yourself until you passout and that idea goes away"
(Mr XYZ had been set out of the fellowship and is now shunned - this last one happened within the last 12 months)

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paleface
"If you even *think* about talking to Mr. XYZ, you should take your own hands, put them on your neck and choke yourself until you pass out and that idea goes away"

This one is definitely a word from God...not sure about the others you listed.

Paleface: I couldn't help but think about several people in that service getting that word, and choking themselves till they passed out......I would crack up.. I am more and more getting the idea of flying out west and going to one of those services. I doubt seriously if anybody knows me. I'd love to see something like that.

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jhorning

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Changed4me
I remember when M started designating the wife as the spiritual leader of a marriage and that husbands were to submit themselves unto their wife. I remember the date, time, place where it happened to me. Part of the"pitch" to accept this was M telling my wife and I that she chose us because we were strong and could handle it.... once again it gave us the feeling of having M's approval I remember how Bill Maybe struggled with this. It ultimately drove him away from his marriage, church and son.

Looking back, as hindsight is always 20/20, this role reversal was designed to break the male spirit and establish M's stronghold as the spiritual leader. I remember G telling me how difficult it was for him. From the early days, I think M saw herself in an exhaulted way because she was the chosen one to bring forth the man of God that was going to bring forth the kingdom on the earth. I think she used the same principle with Gary.... he was the voice from the pulpit, but in reality, she directed him as to what the will of God was going to be.... shining bright the path as the Lamp of Israel....what a bunch of mind controling bunk!...just my humble opinion.

My wife and I came to see Marilyn as a "King Maker". She would help the one she latched onto and propel him to the top.

"Kingmaker" is also used in some countries to refer to those individuals with the ability to influence the selection of political leaders. The term though always unofficial, has tended to gain more importance in places of power struggle e.g. politics, sports organizations etc. Consequently, bestowement of such a title is looked upon significantly and more often as a means of indirect gratification for individuals wanting to silently dictate the affairs of the organization."

This is what has happened to tlwf. I was at the 1984 meeting in Sepulveda when she was choosing the men who would stand with her. They have become what we always tried to avoid: becoming like "Babylon". I heard the tapes where she directed marriages to break up. It was a big mess.

Way back in the early days whenever the phrase,"the living word" was used my wife and I always thought of God's Word (the scriptures), what we didn't realize until later is those who used it the most were speaking of the word, sermons, this weeks, and tapes from jrs. He was not the Christ, John the Beloved, or our Father in the heavens. However, regarding the posts seeking info about John. Was he a drinker? A womanizer? That's like focusing on the debauchery of the prodigal son, "Can you tell me more about those prostitutes?", rather than on the forgiveness, grace, and love of the father. John was a man whom God used just like He has used anyone of us. Different calling, different gifts, but the same Spirit.

Galatians 2:6 "As for those who were held in high esteem—whatever they were makes no difference to me; God does not show favoritism—they added nothing to my message."

We have one Teacher, One Father, One Spirit, and we are all brothers. Once again those in leadership have given themselves over to exalt marilyn and gary the same way they exalted jrs. And now with gary reaching out to the catholic church it's all over, but the shouting. IMHO.

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One thing we may find we might agree on today - is that when we are not rightly spiritually related to one another - as a member of a body of believers, as a church - there are going to be all kinds of things that we may experience, in our relationship with one another - as a result of not abiding in the Word of Christ, given to all, regarding the spiritual relationship, brothers in Christ have with one another - found in Matthew 23. 8-10.

Matt. 23: 8 But do not be called Rabbi, for One is your Teacher and you are all brothers.

.....for One is your Teacher and you are all brothers . No one is to allow his brother to relate to him spiritually , as being more than a brother.

1st. John 14:26 But the Helper, the Holy Spirit whom the Father will send in My name, He will Teach you all things and bring to your remembrance all that I said to you.

Matthew 23:9 And do not call any one on earth your father, for One is your Father, He who is in heaven.

We are not to look to or to spiritually relate to any person on earth, as being more to us than being our brother

Matthew 23:10 And do not be called leaders; for One is your Leader and that is Christ.

No one is to participate in a relationship spiritually with a brother , as being more to his brother - than being a brother.
..........for One is your Leader and that is Christ.

This is one explanation or reason - for " Why " we experienced, in our relationships with one another in the church, so many things that we did experience. As a result of those things we experienced - some of us, ( because of what we were experiencing) became aware that something was really wrong - with the spiritual relationship that our members in the church had with us, we with them and with the relationships all had with one another.