relative of (maybe) ex-cult member and I'm finding it hard to let go of certain emotions
Posted by: liv ()
Date: February 02, 2021 11:16PM

My brother in law (brother of my husband) and his spouse were both pretty deep into NXIVM to the point where I spotted the footage in one of the documentaries in an apparently small circle meeting sitting at Raniere's right.

I won't explain too much because this post would get too long and I don't want to make it too tiresome for everybody.

So, fast forward to today. They may or may not be still in the cult. Given that the organization is greatly diminished and there seems to only be a few die hard members still publicly active. And also, my BIL shared a youtube link from another cult-y guy called Shunyamurti from Sat Yoga Ashram.

Nobody in the family talks about it and I am quite frankly several degrees of separation from the "epicenter", since I'm not really an immediate family member. But I find it hard to let go of feeling betrayed. I used to really like my BIL, we connected at an intellectual level since we were both interested in topics like sociology, philosophy or just general random stuff. I felt like with him I didn't have to explain a lot of background before going into a stimulating discussion that would push my own opinions and thoughts further.

But then he was gradually changing to the point where he was not the same person (and not in the best way). It would feel that he was very condescending and overly proud. If I argued any of his points he would just basically disregard the argument in a very "you're just unaware/ignorant/blind" vibe. Once in a very public conversation during Xmas time, he was just very insisting on how murder being morally wrong was just society's artificial rules (that there is nothing wrong with murder) and insisted on this until it just turned out into a full on fight.

Of course he did all the promoting the "Executive Success Programs" to all of us, our friends, relatives and acquaintances as well. But that's beyond the point.

My own problem is, it has been hard for me to get past my own feelings and not judge him, his spouse and my FIL and MIL, who defend him of course. And it's affecting the way I relate to my husband's family.

I appreciate any advice but I would also thank you for listening/reading.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/02/2021 11:34PM by liv.

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