Hello everyone. I've posted on Mr. Ross' forums before. I'm a college film maker, and my final film, an independent study, is about a fictional narrative about a deprogrammer. I've spent around 500 hours worth of time researching and writing my film, including locating the father of cult deprogramming himself, Ted Patrick, and flying out to his San Diego, California to conduct audio interviews. While Ted was very helpful, he's just one side of the story.

If any of you here have ever been deprogrammed, or know a person who has been deprogrammed, either by Ted Patrick or by someone who used methods similar to his own, please respond and get in touch with me if you don't mind to do so. I'd like to know what the actual session was like, what words were used and how logic and reasoning came into play in order to save you from the cult you were involved in.

I'm not looking for former cult members who used "exit counseling". My film deals exclusively with deprogramming, and I want to stick with that.

If you don't mind to discuss your deprogramming publicly, by all means, respond to this thread. If you wish to talk to me in private, please email me at MovieMaker5087@gmail.com. Thank you.

I deprogrammed myself for the most part

It was a slow awakening. My mother rescued me from a dangerous campus cult in which I was suicidal at the time and refused to let me go back to college there. It was about 2 years afterwards that I searched info about cults cuz mom kept calling it a cult, yet I didnt believe her. Well I found rick ross's warning signs of a dangerous group/leader and all the bells and whistles went off...the criteria fit my little campus church group perfectly to a tee. Finding this out was alot more traumatic than I thought it would be. I never got professional help for it...although I needed it. My ptsd was bad, but I found journaling saved my mind.

I then went through a phase of questioning everything I ever knew to be true, or thought was true...but still 10 years later I still find issues in my beliefs that really get in my way. Like the cult taught us that everything we did, willingly or unwilingly is because it was God that did it through us. This has been the hardest one to deroot. It sounds all fluff and wonderful but if leaves you with no will to do anything out of your own initiative...its like sometimes I feel like if something is going to happen it will happen on its own and any nerve I get up to do something to make my life better is futile.

I been peeling away at this one in layers.

Also there was a major effort to completely wipe away everyone's identity and replace it with the group identity...it took several years to reclaim myself, but I never got back my truly independent nature I had before the cult. Before I was very driven and independent, and now after 10 years, I am still very attached to others in my life, even though they are not cult members, they are just my family members. My brother mentioned a year ago he wanted the independent me back. That was when I realized it was missing. There are alot other things I did manage to overcome like a plaguing sense of guilt, fear of God's wrath, and some pretty dilusional thinking like the leader taught that we can reach physical imortality through "being in the spirit"...starvation and sleep deprivation while dancing for 12 hours straight was his method of mind control for those crazy ideas.

However I nearly died in that cult, things went down hill fast after some heavy mind control techniques that lasted 3 weeks. I have autism and OCD and I just cracked and my OCD went into hyperdrive..like non-stop rapid fire intrusive thoughts. I begged the "pastor" to help me and he just told me that this was God's punishment for me seeking attention. I believed him and felt as if I was doomed for hell. I was fighting suicide for 2 months, every day was a fight to live and not just jump off a bridge. Then my mom picked me up for spring break and quickly saw that I was totally nuts and suicidal. I was placed in a crisis center which put me on OCD meds and anti-anxiety meds and I began to heal pretty quickly. I kept wanting to go back to the cult...I missed them so much. I felt disconnected without them. unknown to me, mom called the school and reported the cult to the president of the school and they were quickly told they were no longer allowed on school grounds. The cult eventually disbanded...the leader is now teaching get rich quick seminars. His name is Frank Spencer.

Anyway I knew none of this cuz mom did not tell me what she did until much later. But she very much underestimated the long term damage that had been done.
I have major issues with self- initiative which I am still dealing with. I was the bottom of the totem pole in the cult because I was willful, and it was not till I became "obedient" that I was treated better.

All the warning signs were there...but no one ever warned me of religious cults when I went off for college...I was warned of the dangers of boys, not leaving your drink unattended at a party, and to not let my social life get in the way of my studies. No one ever said watch out for religious cults. When I joined, I just thought it was a bible study...it was a bible study alright, from hell.
At first they loved me dearly as person with autism, that is like crack...I was hooked. But then they started withdrawing their love when I was "willful" meaning having a mind of my own. There was a level system...I stayed on the bottom level until I gave up thinking for myself. Ten years later, I am still trying to get that back.

I think I may be too late for professional deprograming, but I may be wrong. However my insurance doesnt cover cult deprograming and most deprogramers dont take insurance if they did.

So this has been a DIY project.....however if anyone has any ideas how to get my initiative back, I would be grateful.