Dear M:
Get a lawyer so that you can route all communication through that person and do it NOW, especially if your husbands former boss is trying to get you talk to him, or talk to some 'mediator.'
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Elaine wrote:
I would definitely take up the issue with the employer before I pursue force (e.g. the court system). There's nothing that can not be resolved through communication.
IMO, this sounds like an attempt at spin/damage control.
Two...it may be trap. IMO if you take 'Elaines' advice, by talking to the employer,
you may make exactly those kinds of tactical errors that would cause you to miss filing deadlines or weaken your case.
Getting an attorney at this time will actually save you and your husband stress--and protect you from making tactical errors.
Hiring a lawyer doesnt mean you are obligated to go to court. Many, many people have a lawyer through whom they can communicate when handling complex matters.
Most private citizens who live quiet lives are not aware that a lawyer can function in an advisory/representation/negotiation role--and protect you from bullying and also prevent you from making tactical blunders that an adversary can use against you.
nettie advised
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3. get a lawyer (wait with this a while). But to sue will probably be a tough case.
My only modification to 'netties' advice would be dont wait to find a lawyer. And call that federal phone number you were told about. However, finding a lawyer does not obligate you to file a lawsuit.
But.. hiring a lawyer NOW will enable you to find out the filing deadlines, give you someone who can communicate with your husband's former company, and who will assist you on how to avoid making tactical errors so that just in case you later decide to file suit, you will not miss the deadline for filing, and two you will have a strong case, because the lawyer protected you from making mistakes early in the situation.
Its like going to a doctor to get advice early in an illness so that later complications dont develop.
What you want to do is first talk to the lawyer and learn the relevant
filing deadlines in the event that later on, you wish to take action.
Because one strategy your adversaries may use is to try to sweet talk you to 'resolve this through communication' and cause you to miss the filing deadline in case you later decide to pursue the case. A lawyer can tell you right now what your filing deadline is, the window of time you have to stabilize matters and..(very important!) what kinds of mistakes you can avoid making.
Two--if you get a lawyer NOW, this means if anyone at your husbands former place of employment tries to talk to YOU, you can say, sweetly, 'Please talk to our lawyer'.
This will spare you and your husband stress.
Two, it will prevent you from making tactical errors--which are easily made if you let yourselves be coaxed into talking to them.Three, it will be a signal that you two mean business and cannot be jerked around.
Now,, you may be accused of being 'unreasonable' or 'paranoid' if you insist on routing all communications through an attorney. You are not being unreasonable at all. You can bet your husbands former boss is consulting an attorney---so...why shouldnt you? It will even the playing field!
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Elaine wrote:
I would definitely take up the issue with the employer before I pursue force (e.g. the court system). There's nothing that can not be resolved through communication.
IMO, this sounds like an attempt at spin/damage control. And if you take 'Elaines' advice, by talking to the employer, you may make exactly those kinds of tactical errors that would cause you to miss filing deadlines or weaken your case.
Two, notice how Elaine makes it seem going to the court system is 'pursuing force'? E is making is seem you'd be a bully and a brute to hire a lawyer.
You are not. Remember your husband is the one who lost his job for trying to avoid an experience that is bad for his medical condition.
Threatening someone with losing his or her job and or firing him is using force.
This is exactly the mind fuck your husband wanted to protect himself from.
So.. you are not being horrid or a bully or a brute or unreasonable to hire an attorney. Its the very thing these folks do
not want you to do.
And it may be an example of what some of us warned about--the hazard of being coaxed into some sweet talk that will cause you and your husband to delay getting an attorney, and the filing deadline passing.
And...notice 'Elaines' comment "Makeup - get yourself a job in the meantime, how else will you support your husband?"
Its the classic blame-the-victim stance.
If you go into private communication with types like this, you'll just get your head messed with even more.
Do as Mr Ross and the others have advised, get yourself a labor attorney.
In fact, that is probably what this LGAT doenst want you to do, or they'd not have sent 'Elaine' over here in the first place to write this seemingly honey-sweet advice with the sting in its tail.
PS For all we know, 'Elaine' may be a guy.
Edited 6 time(s). Last edit at 08/27/2008 10:25PM by corboy.