Re: human awareness institute
Date: December 25, 2010 12:52AM
I wish for you much better treatment than you received from this man and am so sorry - as one woman to another - for the experiences you have had. Trust is precious and it is heartbreaking when we find it was misplaced.
Several things in this thread don't line up and I am writing with a few facts. Terry is neither a facilitator nor an intern. (I checked our international list of interns and know all the facilitators.) I have no way of knowing if he is an assistant but his bringing lube and condoms makes it highly unlikely.
Team members do not go to workshops preparing to have sex, we go to hold the container for the participants to learn and grow. We are sworn to not initiate any sexuality and/or not dating for a period of months after the workshop. We are not allowed to be sexual with either participants or even our spouses/partners at workshops. We can share bedding with partner, a fellow team member or a participant with whom we are in a previous relationship only if we receive prior permission from the facilitators - even in these cases we spoon and sleep - even kissing is not allowed.
The only exception to these bans is if a participant asks for our help in an exercise - in this case we are still bound to not exceed/escalate the level of sexuality the participant is asking for in the exercise. In my experiences as a team member in HAI, most of what I am asked for is far simpler (lower key) than anything requiring safe sex supplies. I have never been asked to support a participant by being fully sexual nor would I choose to be a 'yes' if I were asked.
As for all facilitators being American - they all live in America currently but they are not all Americans by birth.
The facts won't help your pain (unfortunately) but they may help you clarify a bit more of what Terry is personally responsible for and what HAI is and is not responsible for. I hope that each of you will find your way to understanding what has happened between you. I wish gentler times for you both.
Wishing you many blessings,
(a HAI intern in the US)