Landmark Dropout -- mixed emotions
Date: November 13, 2003 09:45AM
i just joined this bulletin board forum after attending the november landmark education forum in alexandria, va and dropping out after the first day in order to tend to my emotional wellbeing.
my boyfriend jonathan attended the forum and some of the further landmark education seminars. he is an awesome person and he attributes much of his personal development to landmark and the 'transformational technology' they offer. i decided to attend the forum after having several conversations with jon about it. i thought it would help me get over a depression i've been suffering from for the past two years.
landmark makes you sign a waiver to attend the forum if you have a psychiatric history (ie past hospitalization, psych meds, in therapy -- all of which apply to me). they say that you are responsible for your own "physical, emotional, and spiritual wellbeing" and they need to make sure you are able to take care of yourself while you are attending the forum. it is an intense program, 9AM to midnight for three days (fri-sun.) and then three hours on a tuesday evening. but jonathan thought at this stage in my recovery process i should be healthy enough to withstand the long hours and intensive nature of the forum.
apparently jonathan overestimated my capacity for boredom: by the time the second break rolled around, i felt like i could no longer sit in the chair comfortably and i was missing my boyfriend back in virginia beach. i decided to leave after having a conversation with one of the staff members, who informed me that my money would be fully refunded because of my mental health status (if i hadn't signed that waiver, i'd be stuck with the $395).
i was welcomed home by two very worried parents, who had looked up landmark education on the web (they found the rickross site among others) and were pretty shocked at what they found. they were afraid they were about to lose their emotionally fragile adult child to a dangerous cult. my parents were actually the main reason i decided not to return the second day, after jonathan offered to drive up to alexandria and be with me while i completed the forum.
now that i'm back at my own house with my boyfriend (whom i live with), it has been a difficult time. he still thinks i should complete the forum one day when i am more emotionally sound, or when he can go with me to keep me from feeling bored and lonely. i have mixed feelings because i would like to learn the material they teach, since i felt it was interesting and worthwhile (the little i did learn), but i dont think i should have to pay 400 dollars to do it, and i also dont think i should have to support this organization whose methods i feel are unsound, regardless of how valuable their teachings are. it has caused conflict between me and jonathan, and i am concerned that this will serve as a wedge between us as we move to progress in our relationship.
my boyfriend is a highly intelligent and open-minded person, and i have faith that we will be able to work out this difference. but it really disheartens me that this should have to stand in our way, at least for the time being.
so there is my landmark education story -- i welcome any comments/suggestions/questions.