Instead of fool factor, I'd call it deception.
Deception doenst just mean you've been fooled.
It means someone you trusted failed to live up to their promises.
You find yourself questioning your own intelligence, your own take on reality.
And you are led to question the good faith of someone you thought was your friend, who led you into a mess.
Here is something told me by an attorney about how to care for people who are victims of a Ponzi scheme--a situation where feeling fooled is combined with the anguish of losing ones money.
My informant learned this via a continuing education class--and it discussed Ponzi schemes some years before Bernie Madoff hit hit the news.
The lawyer who gave the presentation had an astute and therapeutic strategy for breaking the news to people who had been victimized in a Ponzi set up--what to do when you're an attorney who has to bring your client bad news that they've been deceived by someone they trusted.
The instructor said, persons harmed by a Ponzi set up need very special care.
It wasnt just the misery of discovering one's money had been lost, but the shame of discovering one had been deceived.
He said it was just as painful, sometimes more painful to discover one had been deceived, fooled, taken in by appearances, than finding you'd lost money.
So this attorney had a special counselng technique. He would find as many persons as possible who had been taken in by the same racket.
He did not break the news to them individually, as is usually done when a professional must deliver bad news.
Instead, he arranged for all the 'marks' to be together in the room and hear the bad news from him, as a group.
That way he could convince them that they were not stupid, that they all had been taken in by a well honed technique
And...it also meant that after the meeting was over, the people could be with each other, exchange phone numbers, contact information---and support each other as a community.
It is very much harder having to face this stuff by oneself, at a lap top, or PC, at home, or at a cafe and find oneself alone facing this bad news.
And...suppose the very persons you want to go to for support, say a trusted friend or two, or your 12 step group, are part of the network used to recruit you?
That is what many people are up against--what if your support community, turned out to be the vehicle used to propagandize something that you have now found out was hurtful, and was not what your lovely friend told you it would be?
You cant go to that same friend now that you've found out she's been part of a recruitment set up---one she may know nothing about or, be emotionally invested in defending.
So, where do you go to create the kind of social support that attorney advised other attorneys to create for thier wounded clients?
When a particular deal is something nation wide, even world wide, one has to use the internet to create a support community.
And, persons trying to create support communities find those communities being trolled, unless they utilize moderation.
to see the range of responses look at the comments following Janaki's chapter entitled
'A work in progress'
Edited 3 time(s). Last edit at 04/14/2009 09:29PM by corboy.