Re: Meditation and Manipulation
Date: September 23, 2008 06:10PM
This is going to take a bit but the best way to describe it is that inside my mind were placed a series of beliefs that were codified and reinforced through hypnotic sugestion and trance states. The core belief is that one is psychic and that what causes everyone elses problems are other people energy in your space, and additionally that you are responsible for all the experiences and things which happen in your life. The core was built around a series of beliefs the you are a spirit inhabiting a body and that when other energies get inside of your space, you will leave your body. This was taken as fact and the oversimplification of the whole psychodynamic process was accepted as dogma.
Initially, we were just taught how to meditate and how to use spirit guides for self healing. However, as one progressed in the classes one was taught less and less techniques and was given more and more dogma. Ultimately the capstone was when one took the clairvoyant training program where they could "see" all of this by using their clairvoyance. The further along you got within the church the more secrecy there was involved. In the clairvoyant lectures we were told that the cause of our pain, fear and suffering were caused by "spiritual" snakes and spider and other "beings." Everyday experiences and coincidence were thought to be created by our "spirit" instead of just normal phenomenae. Does this story sound familiar? Well it should to those who know of the Xenu/Scientology mythos. Compared side by side, the stories I was told and the Scientology mythos are almost exactly the same in outcome if not context. The snakes and spiders came from other universes where they ultimately destroyed their own worlds and were forced to come to our world. Quite a good story, but nothing more than that.
Mr Lewis S Bostwick was quite a lazy man and stole everything from Scientology and simply put it into a different context, but ultimately his goal was to convernt people to way of thinking. A full analysis of Mr Bostwick reveals that he was either Bipolar or Schizophrenic. I suspect Bipolar, as he has all the traits and problems associated with the recurrent cycling going through Mania and then into deep depressive states. He rationalized his whole experiences as "spiritual" energies in his space. I observed his behavior first hand and witnessed moments of complete dissociation and indeed mania. The thing which made him dangerous was the fact that he knew hypnosis and mind controll techniques in addition to being Bipolar with mixed episodes.
After having so much taken from me, I began asking the question who am I? The answer eventually came to me in a moment of complete insight. The answer is that I am! The ultimate core of who and what I am goes beyond so many things and then I was able to see that I could redefine myself through various principles, morals and ethics. Shortly thereafter, in my meditation, I saw the "spirit" construct and became free from its influence. Since this has happened, the fear of the Church doing something to me "psychical" has dissapated and I have seen the fact surrounding the whole experience. It is not good.
I am not a spirit inhabiting a body, I am not a spirit having a physical experience, these are false dichotomies which ultimately fall down in the face of both deep insight and indeed critical thinking and indeed in the face of almost all faiths and religious practices. I am not rulled by a mental contruct which was overlaid on my core personality in an attempt to redefine my entire existence through psychotic delusional beliefs.